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To think that it pays to be self absorbed?

(5 Posts)
weebler Thu 13-Aug-15 21:44:07

All of the most popular women that I know are totally self absorbed and talk about themselves and nothing else. People clamour to be their friend and to kiss their arses.

I listen to others, am kind, am supportive, and yet no one ever seems interested in anything about me or my life.

I think I'm going to have a personality transport and just be a selfish cow and only associate with people who fawn over me.

formerbabe Thu 13-Aug-15 21:49:27

I agree in a way.

It's like everyone says not to spoil your children...I agree with this but looking back nearly everyone I know who was a spoilt child has grown up with such an air of entitlement that everyone seems to worship them and do whatever they want and they end up having fabulous lives envy

daisychain01 Thu 13-Aug-15 21:51:05

I don't think it follows that just because a person behaves in a way that basically makes them a pain in the bum socially, that it means you have to change being kind, considerate and thoughtful. If it means people fawn over them, how is that a good thing? What value is that?

I'd rather have one close sincere friend than dozens of sycophants, non?

YeOldeTrout Thu 13-Aug-15 21:51:23

I think I was a lot happier when self-absorbed, worrying what other people think is hard work.

ollieplimsoles Thu 13-Aug-15 22:53:18

I think there is a difference between self absorbed and self confident.

I think a person who doesn't care what people think is more self confident than absorbed. But they can still care about other people and not step over them unfairly to get what they want. I don't think it ever pays to do that.

I agree you do need to not let yourself be walked over if you want to get ahead a bit, it doesn't help you in the long run.

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