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Would this wedding idea make me stingy/cheap

(151 Posts)
Flissity83 Tue 11-Aug-15 13:32:34

A bit of advice please...

Me and my partner want to get married but we have very little money due to debts and childcare costs etc...

We'd rather not wait for ages to save some money so I am thinking of ways of having a big celebration but not costing thousands.

Would it be a cop out to have a late ish wedding service (say around 4ish). Then hire a space to have a party. Ignore the sit down meal with speeches but to have a hog roast/decent buffet, some music and some booze. That way people can see us get married and celebrate with us but we avoid all the usual traditions in the middle.

AIBU?

TravellingToad Tue 11-Aug-15 13:34:10

Sounds great!

Balanced12 Tue 11-Aug-15 13:34:26

Sounds like a lovely and sensible idea, may I steal it ?!

Your wedding, you and do need to decide what you want the the opinions of others are moot

WorraLiberty Tue 11-Aug-15 13:34:30

Sounds like a fairly normal wedding to me?

It's your day. Do it how you both want to and enjoy it.

AllThatGlistens Tue 11-Aug-15 13:34:50

Sounds bloody wonderful to me, I'd be a perfect guest wink

QweenCnut Tue 11-Aug-15 13:35:13

Sounds fab, can I come?

Alibabsandthe40Musketeers Tue 11-Aug-15 13:35:19

YANBU

Much better to have just one evening party than try and have a sit down meal on the cheap.

I recommend not mentioning that you are getting married when you book the party space, they will triple or quadruple your cost. Same with the caterers.

CloserToFiftyThanTwenty Tue 11-Aug-15 13:35:27

Another who thinks that this sounds really lovely

Buttercup27 Tue 11-Aug-15 13:36:08

We went to a wedding like this a few years ago and it was fantastic.

Nannyplum2029 Tue 11-Aug-15 13:37:00

Go for it, sounds great!

BerylStreep Tue 11-Aug-15 13:37:00

We didn't have speeches, a best man, bridesmaids, favours, photographer, specially made flowers etc. I'm glad we didn't - weddings can become extortionate.

Your idea sounds lovely. I do love a hog roast.

PrettyLittleMitty Tue 11-Aug-15 13:37:01

Yanbu. That is my idea of the perfect wedding. And much less stressful. Go for it and have a great day.

Momzilla82 Tue 11-Aug-15 13:37:22

Go for it. All the fussiness of a "standard" wedding isn't that fun anyway. Have it your way. It's the only day you get to choose what happens. If anyone asks why- just be honest. We just want to be married but a traditional wedding is too expensive and we don't want to wait.

Mutt Tue 11-Aug-15 13:38:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tea4two4three Tue 11-Aug-15 13:38:34

If I was to get married again now I would do it exactly the way you've described. Weddings that begin at noon and end in the early hours (mine) take more stamina than I've ever had and make for a looooong day, especially when you get no sleep the night before.
Mmmmmmmm hog roast grin

OTheHugeManatee Tue 11-Aug-15 13:38:40

Sounds perfectly nice. Go for it!

firesidechat Tue 11-Aug-15 13:39:10

Sounds perfect to me.

In general weddings drag on for far too long and a casual wedding is usually much more fun than a formal do.

daydreamnation Tue 11-Aug-15 13:39:13

That doesn't sound stingy at all! We're doing exactly the same, late marriage then a party with lovely buffet, cake etc. No sit down meal, speeches or hours of photography - perfect! Guests can dress however they feel comfortable, bring their dcs (or not if they prefer!) and we have also politely asked for people not to feel obliged to bring a gift.
I hate weddings that require a huge outlay for guests for outfits etc and/or lots of pomp and ceremony. People generally hate it and the best weddings I've been to have been relaxed and so much fun. Yours sounds lovely, it's your day, so do it your way! It took me and dp a while to embrace that idea but interestingly, despite all our worries about looking cheap etc, our friends and family are all delighted with our plans and clearly can't wait for our big day smile

SugarPlumTree Tue 11-Aug-15 13:39:42

I would love to be a guest at a wedding like that.

LizardBreath Tue 11-Aug-15 13:40:22

Loads of people do that. It's fine.

PurpleDaisies Tue 11-Aug-15 13:40:35

That sounds lovely. Some friends of ours cut their buffet costs to basically nothing by allocating willing guests to bring a salad, a plate of sandwiches etc. People were really thrilled to be asked to help out and the food was great.

packofbaloobas Tue 11-Aug-15 13:41:08

A colleage did the same. She hired the town hall . decorated with fairy lights. Had a hog roast,steak and trimmings, cake and a big bucket of ice with bottles of beer.
it was lovely and relaxed and memorable.

Twowrongsdontmakearight Tue 11-Aug-15 13:41:17

Sounds perfect to me too. If I had my time again I'd do exactly the same? Xx

cosytoaster Tue 11-Aug-15 13:41:33

I think a lot of people would prefer this type of wedding!

Bonywasawarriorwayayix Tue 11-Aug-15 13:42:37

That sounds great. Try a town or village hall. We had our wedding reception in a town hall. It was really cheap and they let us in the day before to decorate.

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