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AIBU?

To contemplate stopping breastfeeding at 6 weeks

44 replies

HelenF35 · 10/08/2015 21:20

I'm exhausted, I feel the evening cluster feeds are never ending and my nipples are aching. I don't know if I can carry on! Sad

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Maryz · 10/08/2015 21:22

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Welshmaenad · 10/08/2015 21:23

6 weeks is a tough milestone, a common time for a growth spurt, and in my personal experience once you get past 8 weeks it does get easier.

However it's entirely up to you if you want to stop, and switch to formula, if that's what you want. Nobody has the right to judge you for it.

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Maryz · 10/08/2015 21:25

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HelenaJustina · 10/08/2015 21:25

You are so nearly there. Mine had growth spurts at 6 weeks and it is tough. But you are so nearly there!

You have done the hardest bit now, just take one day at a time and on bad days, one feed at a time. Take care of yourself.

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wheresthelight · 10/08/2015 21:25

If you are finding it too much of a drain then switch to formula - contrary to some people's beliefs it is not poison and will not forever damage your baby!!

Happy mummy = Happy baby!!

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ChickChickQuack · 10/08/2015 21:25

I topped up with formula in the evenings so I could sleep. Didn't affect my supply at all and took the pressure off! I recommend it!

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Maryz · 10/08/2015 21:25

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SnapesCapes · 10/08/2015 21:27

If it's right for you, then stop. And whatever you do, don't feel guilty for even a second. 6 weeks is fabulous. My MW when I had DS1 said to me "every breastfeed counts for something, so if you only manage one, you've done something amazing". By those standards you've done phenomenally. Flowers It's such a hard, hard thing to keep going.

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Runningupthathill82 · 10/08/2015 21:27

It's perfectly normal to feel this way - DS is almost three and I completely remember how absolutely all-consuming, painful and exhausting it is.

Take it one feed at a time, eat lots, and sleep whenever you can (even if just a five min lie down with your eyes closed).

No need to make any big decisions, just get through each feed and, if you honestly don't want to go on any more, then don't. It's not the be-all and end-all, and if you've done six weeks you've already done brilliantly.

Also, mixed feeding is an option - I breastfed DS til he was one, but he had a few Aptamils along the way. Trust me, when your DC is two and stealing jelly babies out of the cupboards by clambering up chairs, this won't seem anywhere near as important as it does right now.

Good luck in whatever you choose.

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MaximiseProductivity · 10/08/2015 21:29

I DH started giving the odd bottle at 6 weeks and BF had finished completely by 10 weeks. Tbh it was only then that I started enjoying my baby. He's 14yo now and I'm still enjoying him and have managed to stay reasonably sane. I'm not sure that would have happened if I'd continued the BF Smile

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Paulinefowler · 10/08/2015 21:29

You should do what feels right for you.
I must say that I found 6 weeks to be somewhat of a turning point where everything became easier- breastfeeding included.

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SoggyBottoms · 10/08/2015 21:29

I stopped at 6 weeks and never regretted it for a second. God the relief.

As an aside, it always amuses me when bfers talk about the 'faff' of formula. Completely missing the point that sterilising a bottle and sticking some milk in it is SO much less faff than suffering with bleeding nipples, milk blisters, mastitis and all the other various problems those of us who are less fortunate with bfing suffer with...

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TRexingInAsda · 10/08/2015 21:29

I was like this, exactly, exactly this. Dd had been feeding aaaaaaaaall day long, and I rang dh at work and said 'bring home some formula, I can't do this anymore'. He came home, took dd away from me to the supermarket to buy some formula - she was fine, and by the time they got back I'd had enough of a break to carry on and dd's marathon cluster feed was over. After that it was an absolute doddle! No getting up at night, ever, no spending money on formula, no washing up, no sterilising. It was easy.

You've got through the hard bit (or very, very nearly), keep going, you're just about to get to the nice, easy bit! x

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FlopIsMyParentingGuru · 10/08/2015 21:29

Just echoing the posters saying you really have done the hard bit. With both DC I found six weeks was the turning point. Hold in there, it's much easier than sterilising etc

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BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 10/08/2015 21:30

I had a friend who stopped around 6 weeks with her first. With her second she got to that point again and I told her to do whatever she felt was best. But once you get through that wall where it all seems like too much, it becomes the easiest thing in the world She kept going and later said it was some of the best advice she'd had. Especially when comparing it to the ball ache that she went through with bottles and all that in the middle of the night.

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Suefla62 · 10/08/2015 21:31

Do what's best for you! I BF my oldest until about eight months, when her sister came along I BF her for six weeks and she never seemed happy and always hungry, I decided to switch her to formula, she started sleeping and became a happy and contented baby.

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whyayepetal · 10/08/2015 21:31

Flowers for you OP. I remember this very well, the cracked nipples and the pain when feeding. I also remember saying to my midwife at the time that I could completely understand why some mums felt that they needed to stop - particularly if on a short maternity leave and wanting time spent with the baby to be as stress free as possible for both mum and baby.

I did persevere, and for me it did get easier (but was never a walk in the park - DD1 now 16 and trying in other ways now Grin)but had my circumstances been different, I may not have. It is such an individual thing, and I hope you are well supported whatever you decide. I wish you every happiness with your lovely new baby.

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CalleighDoodle · 10/08/2015 21:32

Six weeks for Me was the point when it suddenly got easy. Nipples / boobs stopped hurting. All damage healed. I had good p&a. It is definitely a turning point for many.

Give it another week, as breastfeeding is most certainly cheaper and once it clicks much, much easier!

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BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 10/08/2015 21:32

But soggy it all settles down and you don't usually have all those problems

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Bodicea · 10/08/2015 21:36

Expressing or Mixed feeding or both might be a good compromise. I expressed from about 3 weeks on as i had to give my nipples a break and it got him used to the bottle. I then mixed fed from 10 weeks. It never affected my supply and I got a break ( I had a tendency to cracked nipples and blood blisters) also can get those nipple cover things. I never took to them but another friend swore by them. I managed to get to 8 months mixed feeding. It really doesn't have to be all or nothing.

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HaveTeaWillSurvive · 10/08/2015 21:36

YADNBU to contemplate it, I certainly did!

If you're asking in AIBU because you really want to keep going my tactic was to keep setting myself a target of 'just one more week' and eventually it did get easier - although not at the mythical 6 week point people kept telling me about. Honestly it was pretty tough for the first 10-12 weeks but then great, only stopped when DS was about 14mths.

If however it's really getting you down, bringing in a little formula is not the end of the world!

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Sighing · 10/08/2015 21:38

Honestly you've broken the back of the learning curve. If you do switch to formula nothing bad will happen. If you persevere chances are nothing bad will happen.
You've done / are doing really well!

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yorkshapudding · 10/08/2015 21:38

You should do whatever you need to do to ensure that you're happy, healthy and relaxed enough to be able to enjoy your baby. Your baby will be just fine, however they're fed.

If you decide that you want to carry on with BF it may help just to take it one day at a time. Instead of telling yourself you MUST stick it out for 6 months (I found that some HCP's and breastfeeding advocates got so hung up on this magical 6 months that the attitide seemed to be, 'if you don't manage 6 months you might as well not bother', which is ridiculous) tell yourself "I'll carry on today and see how I feel tomorrow". You have done so well to get to this point, whatever happens next should not diminish that achievement in your mind.

You would not be unreasonable to stop at 6 weeks, 6 days, 6 hours or to formula feed from the word go. Anybody who would consider you unreasonable for your feeding choices is not worth your time.

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HelenF35 · 10/08/2015 21:38

I am expressing a bit too. Been expressing in the morning and using that bottle for the last feed at night as the milk is richer (according to my hv). This has helped with sleep a bit but it's the evening that is killing me. I'm out tomorrow evening so DP has some expressed milk to feed him and I will get a rest. DP goes out a couple of nights every week and I find them hardest because it's much more difficult for me to distract ds from the boob for a short while without him.

Ds is asleep for now (put him in the sling and rocked him till he fell asleep). It only took 2 hours of constant feeding first! Blush

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Runningupthathill82 · 10/08/2015 21:39

If it helps, it was at 10 weeks that it clicked for me. I know that may seem a long way away now, but really does become so, so much easier.
And being able to go out just with your boobs - no formula, no sterilized bottles, no worries about getting it to temperature - is brilliant. I've done both as I mix fed, and bfing is easier once it's established. No contest.

You've done the toughest bit. If you want to stop then do, honestly. Your baby has had so much goodness already. Making it to 6 weeks is a huge achievement in itself.

But if you do decide to carry on, it will get easier and easier from here - and before you know it, your baby will be leaning over, latching on themselves, glugging away, and all done within ten minutes!

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