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AIBU to have a whinge because losing my mind wouldn't be productive?

(18 Posts)
CallMeExhausted Mon 10-Aug-15 17:24:33

Remember back when a family faced medical challenges and they dealt with them on their own or within their faith groups or communities?

Now, they start go fund me pages, contact media outlets, and just generally mooch.

We are in a really bad place financially - have to choose either petrol to get to DD's appointments in London and buying groceries or making the payment on the our vehicle this month. I think I will probably have to try to see if I have anything of value left to sell to cover the shortfall. It is doubtful.

This is temporary, literally a difference of 10 days between today and money. I know too many people who would solve this with an "isn't my child adorable - she also has medical needs - now feel sorry for us and give us money". I feel uncomfortable with this for many reasons - not the least of which is that I try not to lay the "crap" out on the table, so to bare it all and beg for money quite literally makes me sweat.

I hate my life no I don't, I just hate this situation Oh, and my birthday is a week from today. Happy birthday to me.

What is screwing us over right now... cost of travel and lodging every 2 weeks for DD's ortho care after her most recent injury, 3 operations for me in a short span (and associated costs like prescriptions, casts, orthopaedic appliances etc.), DD's casts requiring replacement every 2 weeks, new leg braces because her muscles are wasting and eyeglass replacement for her as her eyes have worsened again and so on.

This has been a less than fabulous summer break - I think it is just getting to me.

As I know it'll be asked regarding why all these medical costs exist, we are in Canada - none of this is covered. While we do have something similar to the NHS - it is also quite different.

My Monday whinge is now complete. Time to put on my big girl pants and get the hell to work cleaning the house.

Thanks for letting me vent.

CallMeExhausted Mon 10-Aug-15 17:35:46

Oh, and I currently have 3 teenagers in the house, only one of which belongs to me.

My sanity is long gone grin

CallMeExhausted Mon 10-Aug-15 19:33:14

I guess I can sit here and respond to my own thread.

I see one thread saying MNers are hypocrites, another saying MNers are martyrs... but those that ask for acknowledgement or a shoulder are apparently not interesting enough to respond to.

Might as well return to work - at least I can do it with a clear mind that I am not missing responses.

makeminea6x Mon 10-Aug-15 19:35:04

Sorry you have all this worry and burden to deal with. I'm listening (well reading, but you know what I mean).

gamerchick Mon 10-Aug-15 19:37:45

I'm very grateful for our nhs have to admit.

Sorry to hear of your troubles though. When people spout God only gives a person how much they can handle like its a compliment I would like to smack them hard in the nose.

makeminea6x Mon 10-Aug-15 19:42:08

Agreed gamer . someone who says that has clearly had insufficient experience of life.

GiddyOnZackHunt Mon 10-Aug-15 19:42:28

Could you sell one of the spare teenagers? grin

There are patches when it does feel like you can never get on top of things so hopefully things will get better soon flowers

DixieNormas Mon 10-Aug-15 19:42:30

That sounds totally shite. Sometimes it just feels like its one shit thing after another doesn't it

Sleepybunny Mon 10-Aug-15 19:42:42

I don't know about anyone else, but I'd rather 'go fund' someone in a shitty situation if it would make a difference than throw money at some of those giant charities where a lot of money is spent on advertising and marketing.

Sorry for the big shite sandwich you're having to bite just OP.

CallMeExhausted Mon 10-Aug-15 19:52:02

Thank you all for tolerating my little pity party. I just got off the phone with Ronald McDonald House to confirm our booking for tomorrow.

The house manager informed me they are full.

Then, she informed me that if there is not a room available (as someone may check out, so a room may become free), we'll be billeted at the hotel down the street - which is a lovely place - for the same rate as we pay for a Ronald McDonald House room. I think someone just sprinkled a bit of sugar on the shite sandwich grin

As an aside, anyone want to buy a teenager?

MoralityPlay Mon 10-Aug-15 19:53:15

Which province are you in?

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate and I don't blame you for having a moan. Can you put some expenses on a credit card?

CallMeExhausted Mon 10-Aug-15 19:59:07

We're in Ontario - and unfortunately no credit card. Although - I am thinking more and more that it might be a good idea to have one.

Sleepybunny Mon 10-Aug-15 20:00:05

I'll buy a teenager, maybe I could use it to amuse my toddler.

In the mean time, let's find you some birthday candles for that sugar sprinkled shite sandwich.


DeathStar Mon 10-Aug-15 20:50:19

Didn't someone sell a slice of cake from a disappointing wedding on ebay once?

You could make - no perhaps not make, exactly - create a papier mache model? of your glittery poop sandwich and put it on ebay along with the story of your dilemma. I'm sure plenty of mums would like a reminder on their shelf that no matter what we go through, someone is having a worse day of it, and once they helped. By bidding on a papier mache poop ornament covered in glitter.

Some sort of disclaimer in the description regarding 'sourced materials' and 'not for human consumption' or indeed valid usage of the words 'poop/shite' and 'sandwich' might be in order. Just to meet advertising product standards. But go for it with the sparkly sprinkly effect.

Wish I had something more constructive to say. Sending you a hug. Going back and forth to hospital is awful, especially on those times where things need to improve and seem to be stuck in limbo - hope there are big improvements and progress on the horizon xx

CallMeExhausted Tue 11-Aug-15 13:52:50

So, I still haven't lost my mind total lie - I lost it years ago, my marbles, too

Instead of being productive and doing the cleaning I wanted to knock off yesterday (superficial things, so that when the ILs visit later this week, it doesn't look like this house has been destroyed by teenagers squatters) I deep cleaned and reorganised the kitchen. Cupboards look fab, and I can rest knowing that I will not have to buy much at all in the way of groceries now that it has all been organised and I have more than I thought I did.

We have a large freezer. I fill it when the coffers are full. Days like today, I am glad I did that.

Have only 2 teens today - the third was repossessed by her mother.

Today, I will finish what I can, then leave a list for the teenagers of things that MUST be done in our absence. If it is not done - their grandparents will be the ones who will see the carnage. Muahahahah. grin

As for funds, I think I will take hat in hand and ask the ILs for a loan. I can offer them a cheque to repay it on the 20th. I hate to be in this situation, but I can't find a way around it at the moment.

Life - why doesn't it go according to script?

DeathStar Tue 11-Aug-15 14:39:07

Fingers crossed for you with the loan request - good luck! xx

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 11-Aug-15 14:47:33

Hi fellow Canada person. Re the credit card and unexpected expenses... I know our local credit union VanCity is doing short, lower interest loans to keep people away from cheque cashing places. Any of your local credit unions doing anything flexible.

Also, I do think Canadian culture is more about doing it yourself than UK culture is. Make sure you are getting all your tax exemptions (children's sports and all those weird ones) and see if any local organizations are doing glasses for free or providing any services. I work for a non-profit in BC and I think we basically all do pieces of what the government does in the UK.

Where in Ontario are you?

CallMeExhausted Tue 11-Aug-15 14:58:16

Southwestern. Think extreme southern tip with two land connections to the U.S.

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