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To not pick my Sis up from her friends?

(29 Posts)
HappyGoLuckyGirl Sun 09-Aug-15 11:23:43

Dsis has a friend who lives about 30 mins away on the bus. She went to stay over the weekend with her DS and DP.

Just got a message from her asking if I will pick her up as she doesn't like getting the bus back alone. (Her DP is going straight to Liverpool from friends house).

She has offered me a fiver which won't even cover my petrol as its a full hour in the car. And my car is a big engine.

I've told her I will pick her up but it will about a tenner in petrol. She says she doesn't have a tenner but she really doesn't like getting the bus. confused

She's a fully grown adult, btw. I'm the only one in my family who drives at the min and hate this sort of thing because I'm made to feel like a taxi.

She knows Sunday is my 'day off' as DS is with his Dad and I like to do the shopping then relax for the rest of the day.

AIBU in saying no, given that she has got a mode of transport she just doesn't like it!

TenForward82 Sun 09-Aug-15 11:25:46

It's the middle of the day, she's unlikely to get hassled / abducted / murdered. You're not a taxi service!

Henriettacat Sun 09-Aug-15 11:26:04

Just say "no". You clearly don't want to collect her.

MagicHouse Sun 09-Aug-15 11:29:32

I think it's ok to say no. But I would be clear about why so you're asked less in the future. Don't blame the petrol money, even though that's part of it. Just say you're busy and that you always make plans for your Sundays. Tell her she'll be fine on the bus.

Soundofsettling Sun 09-Aug-15 11:31:53

It's absolutely fine to say no, she got herself out there, she is a grown woman - she can sort a way back again!

Icimoi Sun 09-Aug-15 11:32:05

Absolutely say no. Why should you take two hours out of your day off and spend a lot of money just because she doesn't like buses and didn't plan ahead to have enough money for a cab?

AlpacaMyBags Sun 09-Aug-15 11:37:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HappyGoLuckyGirl Sun 09-Aug-15 11:37:34

I just feel a bit mean/guilty.

Obviously, I would go straight there if it was an emergency or the middle of the night or something. But just because she doesn't like the bus doesn't seem a good enough reason.

Perhaps I feel bad as she is doing me a favour next week by having DS overnight so I can attend a work function.

But the two aren't related are they? Or should I suck it up, a favour for a favour? Hate second guessing myself!

crje Sun 09-Aug-15 11:40:30

Think it's fine to say no

She is being selfish asking you

Penfold007 Sun 09-Aug-15 11:41:09

Actually I think you are going to have to pick her up as you want her to provide free overnight childcare.

VodkaValiumLattePlease Sun 09-Aug-15 11:42:37

Are you paying her for overnight babysitting? Because that would cost a lot more than a tenner...

MrsGentlyBenevolent Sun 09-Aug-15 11:48:31

Ah, you see I was totally on your side, until you mentioned the free babysitting. Unless the petrol cost really puts you out, I think you owe her one, don't you? I wouldn't make a habit of being a taxi though, I'd be very clear that it's because she's doing you a favour, any other time she'd have to get the bus.

firebladeklover Sun 09-Aug-15 11:50:56

I was going to say tell her no but if she's minding your child overnight next week, then maybe say yes.

WickedWax Sun 09-Aug-15 11:51:23

"I don't like getting the bus".

"Well I don't like driving on a Sunday/for an hour/to places I don't know/insert reason here".

End of conversation grin.

Welshmaenad Sun 09-Aug-15 11:52:23

If she's having your child overnight for free, you're being beyond petty. Just go and get her.

WickedWax Sun 09-Aug-15 11:52:51

Oh dear, just spotted the free overnight babysitting.

Better get going then OP.

Hellionandfriends Sun 09-Aug-15 11:53:29

It's give and take. Do you do lots of favours for each other normally? Is it a two way thing? If not, don't collect her

HappyGoLuckyGirl Sun 09-Aug-15 11:54:42

No, I'm not paying her. But we look after each others DS' on occasion and don't give each other money for it.

I'm giving the boys some treats for the night and giving Dsis and her boyfriend some money for a takeout. But we don't pay each other. I didn't know that was a thing. blush

bridgetsmummy Sun 09-Aug-15 11:56:05

It's not a thing. But she's doing you a favour so you do one for her. It would be really mean of you not to do it.

HappyGoLuckyGirl Sun 09-Aug-15 11:56:06

Oh and a friend is picking them up. I felt bad so said I would go but she has already sorted another lift.

Problem solved! grin

Justbatteringon Sun 09-Aug-15 11:56:12

Go pick up your sister. Its hard not having a car and getting the bus with I'm assuming a young child. Especially since she's doing you a much more time and energy consuming favour.

Collaborate Sun 09-Aug-15 11:57:36

Given the quid pro quo for the babysitting is reciprocal babysitting YANBU.

Pumpkinpositive Sun 09-Aug-15 12:03:03

How did your sister get to her friend's in the first place?

Did she get the bus there or did someone drop her?

I hate the bus myself. I'm a taxi train girl all the way. But I'd never ask someone to go out of their way to drive me home rather than sit on a bus for 30 minutes.

Is your sister a bit of pwincess generally? grin

pictish Sun 09-Aug-15 12:05:56

Say no - she can get the bus! It's not usual for adults to think they are entitled to lifts just because they don't fancy the bus. If she can't drive, then public transport is where it's at for her.
Do not get into the habit of ferrying her around for no good reason.

pictish Sun 09-Aug-15 12:09:56

Sorry - I see it has resolved itself. Yay.

But seriously...no. Don't become a cheap taxi for her. That she wanted to visit a friend an hour away is her own responsibility.

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