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To think that if you sit in a reserved train seat that's not yours then you should expect to move?

(82 Posts)
Rhine Fri 07-Aug-15 20:21:26

Just back from a few days away. We always reserve seats when traveling a long way to ensure that we can all get a seat together. On the way down we got on to find that someone had already taken our seats, the traing was almost full but all moved without hesitation except for one rude women who questioned it. We produced our tickets to prove it and she got up whilst huffing and puffing loudly that she "needed to be sat by her kids" I should add that her kids were not sitting with her, it transpired they were actually sat at the other end of the carriage. So she sits down on the other side of the train and it moves off.

Then at the next stop an elderly lady got on, and told the same women that she was now sitting in her pre booked seat. She once again tried to question it, actually refusing to move at one point and tried to make out that this lady had made a mistake. Eventually she did move, but now started to huff and puff even louder about needing to be near her kids. So I asked her why she hadn't booked her seats as surely it would be easier and it meant she and her children would have been able to sit together but I was promptly told to mind my own business as she's stomped off down the carriage loudly moaning about needing to be near her kids. She found another seat but for ages afterwards I could hear her loudly going on to the person sitting next to her about how rude I was to question why she hadn't pre booked seats and how her need to be sat "Near her kids" was actually more important than those od people whod booked a seat! I was also told by someone sat opposite me that she'd already been moved twice before we got on!

Now if you really need to be sat "near your kids" then common sense dictates that you should pre book seats to ensure you alll get to sit togther, and if others have booked seats then you should expect to be moved on? BTW the "kids" in questions were actually teenagers, not little ones so why they hell she had to be sat near to them is a mystery? And in fact she actually ended up sitting nearer to them when moved on from mine and the elderly lady's seat.

This is not the first time I've encountered this kind of behaviour on trains. One time I' even had a woman point blank refuse to move from my seat and had to fetch a conductor to sort it out. Surely if you sit in a seat with "prebooked" written on it you should expect to be moved on at some point in the journey?

SnapesCapes Fri 07-Aug-15 20:27:14

NBU at all; you want to sit near to your children you pre-book your seats. If you don't, you can't huff and puff when folk ask you to move. I travel to London with the DCs (without DH) often to see family and always pre-book seats because I wouldn't risk not sitting with them. There's always one person rude enough to huff when we ask for our seats back.

Last time we went a young lad got on half way there, stood next to DS1 9 (DS2 4 was on my lap so that a pregnant lady could have his seat) and said to me "your kid doesn't need to sit there, shift him over would you, I'm knackered". I explained that we'd pre-booked the seats and he sneered "well fuck you, then, you snooty bitch". In front of my DCs. People on trains are mad.

Rhine Fri 07-Aug-15 20:34:55

That's awful Snopes. I hate how children are expected to give up seats for adults, surely they are as entitled to a seat as anyone.

bringthenoise Fri 07-Aug-15 20:36:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shakey1500 Fri 07-Aug-15 20:36:51


workadurka Fri 07-Aug-15 20:37:28

YANBU you should expect to move and she was BU to be grumpy, but I think YABU saying "why didn't you book tickets then?" Not particularly helpful, and not every journey is planned in advance/ can be so rigid.

Also LOADS of people don't sit in their reserved seats / don't go on the train they've booked on, which is a bit irritating as well.

workadurka Fri 07-Aug-15 20:38:04

X post with bringthenoise...

cashewnutty Fri 07-Aug-15 20:41:43

You are absolutely spot on rhine. You want to be sure you have a seat then you book one. If you have come on the train at the last minute you can't expect to sit in a pre-booked seat. You were right to challenge the woman.

MaxieMouse Fri 07-Aug-15 20:44:59

Yabu to question her, it's really none of your business. Plenty of people travel at short notice and buy their tickets on the day so yes, you were rude. So was she for moaning when she had no right to sit there, I hate it when people do that.

sandgrown Fri 07-Aug-15 20:47:36

When I booked to go to London recently I used a railcard and DS 13 only paid £2.45. If the train had been full and an elderly person had been standing I would have asked him to stand even though he had a booked seat. He is younger and fitter and had not paid a full fare and it is just good manners

Ubik1 Fri 07-Aug-15 20:49:42

I have travelled with three young children on long train journeys many times. I am a veteran.
Once I got on the train with my children -at that time they were about 10 months, three and five, to find two old ladies sitting in two of my three pre-booked seats.
One of the women explained to me that she would not move as she had 'got there early to get a seat,' and when explained it was reserved she refused to move because her mother was in her 80s and couldn't move again. So me and the kids shared a seat. I stood on the overcrowded carriage holding my baby for three hours until they got off.


Baddz Fri 07-Aug-15 20:51:04

It's happened every time I have reserved a seat on a train.
It's bizarre.

Ubik1 Fri 07-Aug-15 20:52:15

By the way - on Virgin there is usually an 'unreserved carriage' and it's worth asking which carriage it is in advance, if you haven't reserved or cannot get seats in the same carriage. At least you can grab some seats if you know which carriage to target

YANBU. I had this last year on way back from holiday. Me and severely autistic had our seats reserved, as always. Unfortunately, that day coincided with the Dawlish Air Show and there were tonnes of people getting on the trains. We got on the train, after a big queue, to find that our seats,along with several other reserved seats, had just been taken up by other people, all of whom refused to move and acted ignorant. We all had to stand up in the aisle,from front to back of carriage until we got to their stop. That was no fun with ds who was wound up, anxious and kicking off.

Selfish idiots!

EgyptianSnow Fri 07-Aug-15 20:58:15

Yes anyone sitting in a reserved seat should move!
I once had a window seat booked on a plane and when I got to my seat a lady had put her child by the window. I said the window seat is mine and she said her child wanted to look out the window. It was so annoying, I didn't want to create a scene but I was so pissed off!

DameMargaretOfChalfont Fri 07-Aug-15 21:05:52

I hate how children are expected to give up seats for adults, surely they are as entitled to a seat as anyone - it's called good manners.

Sadly another aspect of our life that is dying out.

Most children over a certain age would be far more capable of standing than an elderly person.
Whatever happened to good old fashioned manners and standards.

80sMum Fri 07-Aug-15 21:07:36

I didn't know that you can reserve seats on trains! I don't blame other passengers for sitting in them, even though they are marked as reserved. How does anyone know which station they are reserved from?

cashewnutty Fri 07-Aug-15 21:09:31

80'smum It says on the seat back what station they are reserved from. It is very clear.

Rhine Fri 07-Aug-15 21:09:41

It usually says above the seat which station the seat is reserved from.

LeftMyRidingCropInTheMortuary Fri 07-Aug-15 21:10:11

YABU purely for repeatedly using the word "sat" instead of "sitting".


Shakey1500 Fri 07-Aug-15 21:10:12

Because it says on the reserved chitty on the seat!

80sMum Fri 07-Aug-15 21:10:24

damemargaret I was thinking exactly the same thing! Whatever happened to good manners and politeness?

Ubik1 Fri 07-Aug-15 21:11:22

Although Virgin posts the reservations electronically above seats so if the computer crashes it's a free for all hmm

HeartsTrumpDiamonds Fri 07-Aug-15 21:12:52

80sMum there is a little card (on older trains) or a little electronic sign (on newer trains) that says exactly that. "Reserved from Peterborough to York" or whatever. No idea if those stations are on the same line BTW, just illustrating grin

80sMum Fri 07-Aug-15 21:13:35

YABU purely for repeatedly using the word "sat" instead of "sitting"

I felt the same (but was far too polite to say it!) smile

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