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to risk a move just before reception starts?

(26 Posts)
Lostandlostsomemore Fri 07-Aug-15 09:23:20

Thinking ahead as I'm sure there will be lots of other people looking that will get it over us but just on the off chance...
Basically we have privately rented for 10 years and in that time have had to move 8 of those, generally rent increases / landlord sells / landlord moves back in.
This time it's because we have a horrid racist neighbour who sits in his garden making remarks about our mixed race children.
Either way, we moved in here in February, close to the school I wanted, 2 bed house £1000 a month which is normal for this area.
I can't walk to school as 3 miles away but only a short drive.
Obviously since we moved in things have got much worse with the neighbour and I can't bear to live here anymore.
We have looked at probably 20 similar properties trying to stay in the same area for the schools ( especially as I have a daughter of 3 also so thinking of them both ) and we have lost out on every one.
So many people are going for the same houses and they all earn more than us as I'm a stay at home parent.
Hubby is a fireman so earns £40,000 a year so enough to pass the credit thing for the rent but there are just more people going for these houses and some landlords have picked people with no children.
I widened my search thinking I would make the drive to school and I've come across a 3 bed house for £1000 with a housing trust, so no moving, no rent increases and the instability for the children might actually stop.
But - the house is in redhill ( we are in haywards Heath currently ) which is a good 20 miles away from the school, so not only would take a long time it would end up costing a fair bit doing that drive all the time to school.
I'm aware there are probably going to be no places in any of the reception classes through the whole of redhill, even worse as we really wanted a catholic primary and there's only 1 so no doubt full.
Would it be crazy to take it in the unlikely chance we got offered it?
My husband thinks we should, privately renting is so uncertain we could have them both in the school for instance and then have to move and end up having to move them in crucial years so he thinks now is the best time to try and do this.
I'm so confused sad

Fizrim Fri 07-Aug-15 09:26:45

I'm not sure the school would keep a place for someone 20 miles away, and that is an awful long time to be in the car each day for your 3 year old if she'll be with you.

Fizrim Fri 07-Aug-15 09:29:58

Have you checked with the admissions office for the new area? I moved shortly before my DD started reception and they were very helpful although they needed proof of the new property before allocating a place.

britnay Fri 07-Aug-15 09:31:51

20 mile commute to drop them off to school? Don't be ridiculous, that is not practical. Lots of money on fuel. It'll take ages to get there. Winter will be a nightmare.
3 miles can be walked easily, provided that there is nothing physical preventing you. I walked 2 miles to and from work up to 8 months pregnant, in a job where I was standing up all day.
Just keep looking in current area.

Finola1step Fri 07-Aug-15 09:35:08

The cost of driving those 20 miles per day will be ridiculous. You will presumably lose your sibling priority for the second dc.

There is another possibility. Go for the house in Redhill. Don't take the place at the Haywards Heath school. Apply for a Reception place in Redhill and keep your fingers crossed. As your dc will be classed as out of school, this might push you up the waiting list. It is unlikely that the new LA will think you should have kept the Haywards Heath place.

But speak to pupil admissions (or email so you have evidence if a paper trail) first. And accept that this move may well mean that you never get a place in a Catholic school.

IMO there's not a chance I would expose my dc to what your NDN says to your dc. There isn't a school in the land worth that. Go over to Redhill this weekend. Check out the local area. Have a good walk round check out what its like and the feel of the place.

Lostandlostsomemore Fri 07-Aug-15 10:02:09

Finola,
Believe me I agree or I wouldn't be doing this.
Schools have always been a massive importance to me, probably as both parents are teachers and we have always kept schools in mind when we moved etc, trying to stay near the best schools possible, but this was out of my hands.
I never knew this was going to happen and I would have moved a lot sooner but we are actually signed into a 12 month contract and the landlord took some persuading to let us leave early hence out search for the last month.
Well, not that much persuading as I simply told her I would take the matter to the police and then she worried that if she needs to sell the black mark would show.
I have spoken to admissions but until we have an address there's nothing they can do and the catholic school deal directly with applications so I would have to wait for them to re open to even enquire.
Of course the easiest thing would be to move to another local house but we just aren't even getting a look in it's becoming really depressing and distressing

Lostandlostsomemore Fri 07-Aug-15 10:03:21

P.S it isn't me who can't walk the 3 miles but the 3 year old won't sit in a pram any longer but neither could she walk that distance

nickelbabe Fri 07-Aug-15 10:05:25

Firstly, I would ring the school, or send them an email (the local catholic one you're interested in) and explain the situation. Ask them what the deal is (even if you need to email them - our RCP checks their emails regularly in the holidys)

Please don't even think about driving 20 miles every day for a school place!

If you're going to move, then i think moving before the child has started school is the best time - if you're really unhappy where you are, it makes no sense to prolong it just because you might not get a school place
And you can defer starting until a place has become avaialble

Lostandlostsomemore Fri 07-Aug-15 19:10:14

I've emailed the school as there was no answer on the phone.
I think if we get it, considering how little security we have privately renting along with living next door to such horrible people, we will have to take it and hope on a decent school place

GiddyOnZackHunt Fri 07-Aug-15 19:44:38

That's 20 miles 4 times a day. One of those trips will be in rush hour. Have you driven the route to get there for school starting time?
Driving 400 miles a week on the school run is lunacy.

Lostandlostsomemore Fri 07-Aug-15 22:57:44

I wasn't planing on coming home in the day, that would be far too much.

GiddyOnZackHunt Fri 07-Aug-15 23:06:28

So what happens with your youngest while you're hanging around Redhill all day?

mysteryfairy Fri 07-Aug-15 23:08:30

If you get the house I would take it. You're a stay at home mum who values education. If your DD doesn't start reception on the first day in September it's not a disaster for her, not ideal but definitely workable.

You will be allocated a place near the new house - maybe not the ideal place, but you can go on waiting lists too.

Children in infants move schools all the time and cope well. Far better to have this impact now than continue to hear racist insults and potentially have a bigger impact later in your DCs' school careers.

Lostandlostsomemore Sat 08-Aug-15 09:15:38

Good morning,
The school is in haywards Heath where my daughter already attends pre school, she is due to do 2 full days starting September so I was thinking of volunteering in the school etc to pass my days.
I know it's not ideal but I rarely come home in the day, we spend most of our time out at parks / children's centres / soft play / swimming so that wasn't a major worry of mine although driving 50 miles a day 5 dAys a week would end up costing money we don't have.
I agree, it's not ideal but he isn't behind in any way and I will help him in any way I can whilst he isn't at school.
I just can't see much movement in the reception year but maybe I'm wrong and we may be okay.
How likely are we even to get this house is beyond me, we have never viewed one ( or been able to as they were never market rent before so you had to be homeless ) but I really hope so
Yesterday the neighbour was sat in the garden comparing the kids to the monkeys in the zoo sad

meadowquark Sat 08-Aug-15 09:25:31

I would take the house in Redhill and create a new life there. Primary age children move all the time, and as you are SAHM, you are in a good position to go on a waiting list for a preferred school.

RainbowRoses Sat 08-Aug-15 09:31:17

I would video him and use that as proof for the police.
Nasty man angry

RainbowRoses Sat 08-Aug-15 09:31:47

And then move to Redhill

Lostandlostsomemore Sat 08-Aug-15 10:05:25

My landlord has given me back my deposit in order to move easier on the condition I don't call the police as after we leave she wants to sell ( every tenant leaves this property - no bloody wonder ) so have just been desperately searching but there are so many people looking at 1 property it's insane.
I guess it's going to the the same if not worse looking at this housing association one Wednesday sad

RichardInBermuda Sat 08-Aug-15 15:17:44

I have a very similar story. Im moving from overseas and just rented a house in west bury. I assumed that my daughter would go to the school 1 minutes walk away. the council are processing my application on monday. Ill private message you how far away the school is.

petalsandstars Sat 08-Aug-15 15:27:32

Check the admission procedures for the local authority you would be moving into. We've moved in the holidays and got a place despite the class being full as other nearby classes are also full so were given the catchment school as an excepted pupil. I'd take the ha house.

Lostandlostsomemore Sat 08-Aug-15 17:13:59

I will take it if we get it, I just can't do anything until the address is confirmed.
Petrified of the credit checks now sad even if we get offered it in the first place

contractor6 Sat 08-Aug-15 23:07:10

Firstly call 101 and report neighbour, then find out if he is renting and inform his landlord.

Purplepoodle Sat 08-Aug-15 23:23:31

honestly I'd take the housing association one if you can. schools are important but having a home you can call your own is a big thing.

Pico2 Sun 09-Aug-15 00:08:15

I know it's a while off, but when your 3 year old gets a reception place, your older child will then qualify for sibling priority, so depending on the admissions criteria for the school you get your 3 year old into, your older child will probably zoom up the waiting list and have a good chance of moving the older one to the same school then. So I'd move and take whatever place your older one gets offered (subject to it being at least ok for a couple of years) with a plan to end up with them at a local school together when possible.

Lostandlostsomemore Sun 09-Aug-15 12:17:17

He doesn't rent, he owns.
He has also made numerous comments about " trampy renters " in his garden so that we can hear.
Yes I've looked at the admissions criteria of the closest schools and come when she starts school ( which is actually only next September ) he would become a priority so it may only be for his reception year he was placed somewhere else, although I would hold out and keep him home until January until he legally has to start anyway just in case a house did come up it would avoid the moves for him.
I really want the house sad

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