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To find this vaguely nauseating

(31 Posts)
ElementaryMyDearWatson Thu 06-Aug-15 11:05:08

I sent a query to Apple about my Apple ID information. I've just got what I suspect is a standard response which includes the following:

"I know how important it is for you to have this addressed right away. I will guide you with the information to reach out to the appropriate team to get this issue addressed. ".

Really? It wasn't that important for me to have it addressed right away, telling me that they will "guide me" just sounds patronising, and I have no intention of "reaching out" to anyone. I may phone them, however.

I suppose it's grumpy of me and I should be pleased that they are trying to help, but honestly I would have been fine with a brisk "Thanks for your inquiry. I think the quickest way to resolve this issue would be for you to telephone XXXX Department, this is their number." Or, even better, "I have contacted XXXX Department who have resolved the issue by ...."

Poledra Thu 06-Aug-15 11:16:39

I fucking hate reach out. My US colleagues use it all the time, and I can just about tolerate it when they do, but it's seeping into the vocabulary of my UK colleagues. I may have raised my eyebrow (the left one, can't move the right one on its own grin) once or twice...

GoodbyeToAllOfThat Thu 06-Aug-15 11:18:26

"Reaching out" = horrible. Not all Americans use this. smile

MrsHathaway Thu 06-Aug-15 11:35:10

Reach out used to imply emotion. It is not a synonym for "contact".

DJThreeDog Thu 06-Aug-15 11:43:52

'reach out' and 'going forward' = two most hated but most often used corporate wank speak.


Trumpity Thu 06-Aug-15 11:44:09

Hate "reach out". Argggh it sounds like pretentious wanker speech.

Totality22 Thu 06-Aug-15 11:46:22

Reaching out is standard office jargon for the US. All my clients are East coast and I spend a lot of my time reaching out to them. Fucking hate the term!!!

Sandbrook Thu 06-Aug-15 12:16:43

"Touch base" makes me want to rip my arm off and shove it down offenders throat.

Sandbrook Thu 06-Aug-15 12:17:34

grin @ corporate want speak

Sandbrook Thu 06-Aug-15 12:18:16

Wank not want! My phone not fond of a Wank grin

YouTheCat Thu 06-Aug-15 12:19:11

Bloody hippies.

chippednailvarnish Thu 06-Aug-15 12:21:16

Corporate wank word bingo is a favourite of mine;

Moving foward together
Being Brave

If I can tick them all off in one meeting, I win!

moresnow Thu 06-Aug-15 12:23:15


Is this a thing? Google offers only nice salad dressings.

Bostin Thu 06-Aug-15 12:23:51


SlightlyJadedJack Thu 06-Aug-15 12:24:34


TheCowThatLaughs Thu 06-Aug-15 12:26:04

Reach out reminds me of sons of anarchy. I didn't know it was corporate-speak, its associated with violent fictional hell's angels for me hmm

chippednailvarnish Thu 06-Aug-15 12:27:59

Ah, well a Vinegrette in corporate wank speak is sequence of database procedures that result in a new record. As told to me by a sales bloke.

I kid you not.

carabos Thu 06-Aug-15 12:28:56

Watch House of Cards on Netflix - the Kevin Spacey one. They say it all the time on there in completely inappropriate contexts. Once you've noticed it, it really grates.

Ilovecrapcrafts Thu 06-Aug-15 12:31:03

It's a computer I had a session with one yesterday and it's language skills were awful- "I am understanding you want your personal datas to be safe. It is relieving"
Massive TWAT

GoodbyeToAllOfThat Thu 06-Aug-15 12:31:13

Kevin Spacey's dialogue is deliberately moronic and jargony. He's politically shrewd, which means he has to speak "to the people".

GoodbyeToAllOfThat Thu 06-Aug-15 12:31:50

It's a computer I had a session with one yesterday and it's language skills were awful- "I am understanding you want your personal datas to be safe. It is relieving"

Jeez. Was he a native speaker of English?

Mmmnotsure Thu 06-Aug-15 12:37:47

Boston grin I have just needed to show my dd a video to explain yr reference. She is concerned about my musical upbringing now.

BigChocFrenzy Thu 06-Aug-15 13:27:57

I hate the "mission statement" that every organisation has. Like a bunch of kids playing soldiers.

When did everyone start "onboarding" new employees. I keep thinking water-boarding

ElementaryMyDearWatson Thu 06-Aug-15 13:30:05

Bostin, I am so going to use that diagram in my reply!

ElementaryMyDearWatson Thu 06-Aug-15 13:31:40

Chipped, I wonder whether your sales bloke meant vignette? Not that that's any less wanky.

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