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To not give a crap about not being Godmother?!

(18 Posts)

Because apparently I should be really upset!

There's five of us in our friendship group, 4 of us are v close and the 5th has become distant since moving away but she's still "one of us!"

Friend A has just had a gorgeous little boy and has asked friends B and C to be godmothers (they were physically there for her during a difficult time after the birth when I couldn't be if that makes any difference!)

When I've mentioned the baby or christening--or something completely unrelated-- people have looked at me with pity and sad "how mean that is" "it is sad when you realise you're not as close as you thought" "that's bloody horrid to leave you out" "oh, I thought you were friend!" To name a few.

But I don't actually care...if I'd been asked then I'd have been honoured but I still love that baby and plan on spoiling him rotten!

To me, if she'd have chosen 3 of us then that beans leaving the last friend out...if she chose all of us then 4 godmothers is slightly mad! And more to the point, it was her choice!

I'm vaguely getting annoyed with the "oh I'm sorry!" Comments from people !

Aibu not to care?! And not to want stupid comments?!

Whoops! That was longer then I thought!

yogababymum Wed 05-Aug-15 08:01:23

I don't get why people are saying that to you. Like you said it would be silly to have you all. It's not a big deal.

Mairyhinge Wed 05-Aug-15 08:01:30

Just say to anyone who is mentioning it, " oh I quite understand her reasoning, my satanic worshipping is probably to blame"
Might work, but honestly I'd cut them, off straight away, just say you're not baptised or something if it helps.

SirPercyPilkington Wed 05-Aug-15 08:03:46

People just love a bit of drama and probably want you to rant off about it.
I would say to them that it's not very nice to cast aspersions like that and if youhad any issues, which you don't, you would discuss it with the mother, not you, you gossipmonger.

Well done on being level headed and normal!

maz210 Wed 05-Aug-15 08:04:18

I'd say your friend wants to recognise that friends B and C helped her through a difficult time - that's not taking anything away from you at all.

It sounds like others on the outside don't fully understand or are maybe causing a bit of trouble?

I agree 4 godmother would be very odd, I've never known a christening where there were more than 2 godparents of each gender.

Mind you, I'm probably biased, I turned down being godmother to my niece because I'm not religious and didn't want to lie about it.

It just feels like everyone wants a drama over a completely non event! Argh!

I really like the satanic cult idea ! I could probably get away with that with my goth hair grin

knittingbat Wed 05-Aug-15 09:00:49

Also she might be thinking about having another child at some point and want some great godparents left for that child?

knittingbat Wed 05-Aug-15 09:02:46

Although, OP, obvs if she does and you're not the chosen one THEN DROP HER LIKE A STONE. Jokes, people choose godparents for all sorts of reasons, your attitude is v normal and nice.

StampyMum Wed 05-Aug-15 09:04:08

YANBU, that's mental. I would find that really annoying, and I'd probably be on here complaining about it grin

LilyMayViolet Wed 05-Aug-15 09:06:18

I'd be like maz210. I wouldn't be a godparent as I'm not religious. Yes, people are being very silly op, Don't blame you for getting annoyed!

You know what, fuck it, I'm just going to go and stand at the font with the god one will dare turn me away wink

LokiBear Wed 05-Aug-15 09:19:07

I experienced similar when my dh's cousins got engaged after us but then dared to book their wedding three months before ours. Cue lots of buzzard comments about how they 'had to get in first' and how annoyed I must be hmm. It didn't bother me in the slightest. I had a brilliant time at their wedding and still had my own to look forward to. I just responded with 'don't be daft, it's going to be brilliant'.

I'm pleased everyone else think it's mental grin

Wondering if I could go christening-Zilla though just for the fun of it!

grannytomine Wed 05-Aug-15 10:20:13

I have 4 kids, I didn't want all my friends/family to be godparents to first child. I wanted them all to have their own godparents, not share, so that had people who were special to them. It would have been a bit short sighted to use them all for number 1.

I think certain people just like to be professionally outraged grin

cranberryx Wed 05-Aug-15 22:45:35

I am outraged for you! Now you have to storm the church wearing a massive white christening dress and a best godmother t-shirt!!


Jokes - I think I would feel the same way, at the end of the day it doesn't really matter, four godparents is too many and I wouldn't be bothered if I were in your shoes either.

Some people just love to try and create a bit of drama, don't they!

Isn't an adult christening dress essentially going to look like a wedding dress? I could really be the star of the show then grin

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