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To be just a tad miffed?

(26 Posts)
rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 20:26:40

So ... a friend of mine (well sort of friend - we have boys in the same year at school who are good friends) asked me last week if we wanted to go out for the day this week. She basically wants to get her boys (15) & (12) out of the house before they totally vegetate.
Her youngest ds is autistic and therefore is sometimes a little unpredictable with new things. I work in childcare so I totally understand how difficult it can be.
Anyhow .... SHE mentioned going further afield to a big city and I said that was fine with us. Lots of talk followed asking if her ds would be ok with that, what we could do etc etc.
Fast forward to yesterday and she text me saying ds was now not comfortable with it all and older ds being a pain too. I was laid back and said it was fine and would younger ds prefer to do something local or something he's more comfortable with? Said we could postpone until things were calmer or could just go to park or beach or whatever.
It was decided that maybe we should postpone for now. Fine with me.
This morning she then posts on fb asking if people (not us!) want to go to the beach with them because they had plans that had been changed!!!! Errrr not by us!!!!! confused
She then posted photos on fb of them at the beach!
I was just shock and thought, 'How bloody cheeky?!'
Fine if either her or ds' didn't want a day out with me and my gorgeous kids wink but don't bloody offer then retract and then advertise a different day out for different people and openly flaunt it on bloody fb!!!!!
Iirc i think she did something similar last hols too hmm
so, aibu to be just ever so slightly miffed by this?

Nativity3 Fri 31-Jul-15 20:28:15


GraysAnalogy Fri 31-Jul-15 20:29:36

Yeah I would be annoyed too. I'd probably post something like 'we would have loved to come to the beach if you'd told us when you changed plans'

SandysMam Fri 31-Jul-15 20:32:35

Not your circus, not your monkey's... you can't control someone else's weirdness so don't even try. Fuck her, she is obviously a dick and u have had a lucky escape finding out before you got too friendly.

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 20:38:23

LOL and thanks guys! I just thought that maybe i was being a bit stupid and sensitive and thinking too much into it.
I must admit that I've been totally immature since and posted on fb about what a lovely day me and the kids have had!

BitOfFun Fri 31-Jul-15 20:40:21

Maybe she just changed her mind in the morning and didn't want to mess you around? I'd just ask her.

GraysAnalogy Fri 31-Jul-15 20:41:08

You'd at least say, 'last minute thing, we're going to go to the beach if you'd like to join'

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 20:41:43

Grays I'd love to say something like that but I'm just a bit chicken. Don't know why because i'm usually quite gobby blush

GraysAnalogy Fri 31-Jul-15 20:42:35

Ah it's easy for me to say when it's not me in the position. Although I'm gobby too and I wouldn't be able to resist blush You could always go the 'hope you had a good time, we ended up staying in' route wink

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 20:45:59

BitOfFun* yes of course she probably just changed her mind and thought 'I just need to get the little fekkers out somewhere' but I'm just miffed that a message didn't come my way saying 'Sorry messed you around, we WILL go to the beach now and do you all want to come?!'
Even a 'I know you've already probably made other plans but .......'

LilyMayViolet Fri 31-Jul-15 20:51:36

You're not being stupid. That's irritating and the fbook thing is really niggly!

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 21:00:14

Grays Ive had a glass of vino now so I might just post that I hope they had a lovely time wink
note to self don't drink vino before posting on friend's fb wink

Hassled Fri 31-Jul-15 21:03:01

You should certainly like the post. Make damn sure she knows you've seen it. Some people are just clueless, aren't they - do they not care if they hurt people or does it just not occur to them that they might cause offence?

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 21:09:36

I honestly don't think she'd go out of her way to cause offence but maybe she just didn't think that i'd see her post and that i might be offended?!!! Bit weird though isn't it cos she knew I'd see it!
That's why i posted in abiu really because maybe i'm just being a sap and i need to realise that not everyone treats people in the same manner?

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 21:14:15

Oh dear. A glass of vino and Ive just liked her post and told her she should have asked this morning and we could have joined them.
that's immature isn't it? blush
Shit. Lol.

Vatersay Fri 31-Jul-15 21:19:00

I pretty sure I'd be busy from now on.

QOD Fri 31-Jul-15 21:26:42

Yanbu. Old.bat

rainbowstardrops Fri 31-Jul-15 21:27:09

Vatersay that's exactly my stance for at least this holiday. I'm sure i must have M.U.G. tattoed somewhere on my forehead confused

ShadowStar Fri 31-Jul-15 21:27:54

Sounds like a perfectly reasonable response to her post to me. The whole situation sounds extremely irritating.

GraysAnalogy Fri 31-Jul-15 21:34:28

That's not immature at all!

highkickindandy Fri 31-Jul-15 22:49:07

as with Vatersay - I wouldn't bend over backwards for her next time she wants her kids to be entertained, I'd be busy unless her plan suited me anyway and I'd be happy to pursue it if she dropped out again

rainbowstardrops Sat 01-Aug-15 00:08:18

Thank you!! I feel strangely justified in being miffed all day now!
Just checked and she hasn't redponded to my fb response yet!

GraysAnalogy Sat 01-Aug-15 00:23:49

There's not much she can say really, she knows she's in the wrong grin

rainbowstardrops Sun 02-Aug-15 15:16:45

Sorry to resurrect this and I'm honestly mature enough to get over it but so called 'friend' ignored my comment saying she should have mentioned to me,the day after SHE cancelled our day out, that she now intended to go to the beach as we could have joined her and has now proceeded to ask 6 other friends when they can make a day at the beach with them!
I'm not stupid - it's clearly us that's the problem here. Just don't know why because my two are quite laid back compared to her two confused

esiotrot2015 Sun 02-Aug-15 15:29:53

Oh dear
I'd delete her from fb & end the 'friendship'

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