My 43 year old friend never stops moaning about being single. It's all she ever talks about. She has had multiple disastrous relationships as she moves them into her house asap often under a fortnight after meeting in a nightclub (the same nightclub!) I've tried tactfully to approach the subject, I've tried to make suggestions as to how she could meet guys in non nightclub situations & take more time to get to know them, I've tried, after 20 years of the same pattern of behaviour and the same mind numbing conversation, being blunt and telling her that her blatant desperation is obvious to men & putting them off (confirmed by asking a few ex-dates what went wrong- her suggestion). After a conversation where I ask is she aware it's all she ever talks about, I'm told that's what friends are there for, to listen to her moaning about being single & depressed whereupon she states that she never talks about this to potential dates or strangers so they'd never know she was "desperate", I just shut up.
However we went out for my birthday recently with people she didn't know, bar one a friend of mine she was harassing chatting up online. All she spoke about all night to everyone hogging the group conversation was how she didn't have a man, all men are bastards and every one of her ex's has married the next gf after her etc. Needless to say all my other friends were home & tucked up in bed by 8pm unable to deal with this.
I've tried so hard over the past 20years to be supportive and constructive in my advice. I've been a shoulder to cry on with every break up. I've sat and put up with the 'you're ok you've got a man' conversations that happen during every communication we've had in the past two years. She didn't bother to call when I split with my ExH likely because she was unhappily engaged so had no real need for me. I've never bailed out on a friendship before and I've put up with some amount of bad treatment from people but I just can't bear it anymore.
AIBU to just walk away and let her wallow in her own misery?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
AIBU to walk away from 20+ year friendship?
7 replies
Reginamangina · 31/07/2015 01:53
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.