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To think it's cruel not to give a toddler any toys?

(58 Posts)
CeCeBloomer Tue 28-Jul-15 15:20:25

My SIL nannies for an 18 month old who isn't allowed any toys, parents believe over stimulation causes attention problems. Is this a thing? I had never heard of it. Just seems pretty cruel to me, I can't imagine not playing with my dc with their toys. I also thought playing and toys helped their development?

Pardonwhat Tue 28-Jul-15 15:23:05

Is this real? What!?

CeCeBloomer Tue 28-Jul-15 15:24:54

Yes it's real - was talking to my brother about it at the weekend as he was saying how the little one goes nuts around other kids as he doesn't get chance often sad

CeCeBloomer Tue 28-Jul-15 15:25:27

And doesn't have any toys

SrAssumpta Tue 28-Jul-15 15:26:52

Seems a bit odd alright. In saying that my DD has no interest in toys whatsoever, she loves imaginary games and playing shop keepers, dinosaurs, floor lava type games so toys aren't essential at all.

Doesn't stop me producing them at birthdays and Christmas though for them to be cast aside angry

NowSissyThatWalk Tue 28-Jul-15 15:26:58

Bloody hell, YANBU. Kind of tantamount to indirect neglect if you ask me.
Is he allowed to play imaginary games or anything??

bumbleymummy Tue 28-Jul-15 15:27:40

What does he do when he's at home? Are they doing things with him? Is he allowed books/colouring in etc?

ErrolTheDragon Tue 28-Jul-15 15:28:21

Weird... there's a huge gulf between 'over stimulation' (if that's even a real thing) and no toys.

What does she do with the child?

MewlingQuim Tue 28-Jul-15 15:29:59

Seems odd, but some people have weird ideas.

The child will just make their own toys, though. DD is currently shooting me with a stick despite having plenty of toys hmm

Actually, looking at the piles of lego and other plastic shite spread around my house I'm thinking raising DD with no toys might be a good idea grin

CeCeBloomer Tue 28-Jul-15 15:31:13

I think she plays with him, just no toys/TV (Obvs). My toddler is really happy entertaining herself with toys, too young for imaginary games I think at 18 months?

Pardonwhat Tue 28-Jul-15 15:31:40

Sounds more like the poor boys being raised as a social experiment than as a much loved child.
Odd and I'd actually say it's very cruel as well.

Gottagetmoving Tue 28-Jul-15 15:33:02

Its odd but so long as the child has access to other things to play with or the parents play with the child then I can't see it is harmful.
There are millions of children in the world who have no toy and to be honest children here probably have far too many.
It is good to encourage their imagination.

Goldmandra Tue 28-Jul-15 15:35:40

Is it an extreme Montessori type approach where he is encouraged to use real items to perform real tasks?

DocHollywood Tue 28-Jul-15 15:35:54

There was an MNer who had a basket of natural toys that we all copied. Cones, wooden spoons, shells, all sorts of tactile, exploratory items. Can't remember what was in mine. No child 'needs' brightly coloured plastic toys although I'd be a bit surprised if there was actually none. And does this mean no teddy to cuddle?

PumpkinPie2013 Tue 28-Jul-15 15:36:52

I think it's odd and quite sad for the child sad My DS is 20 months now and we have lots of fun playing with his mega blocks and cars etc. I can't imagine not having toys available for him to play with.

All that said - his favourite game at the moment is emptying out the tupperware so he can play with that!

BrianButterfield Tue 28-Jul-15 15:37:45

You can have imagination and toys though, my 19mo loves building with megablocks (she makes 'ice lollies'), looking after her baby doll including giving it drinks and changing its nappies, she also loves pretending to be a cat for some reason. But even pretending games are better with a few props and the right toys can open up a game hugely. E.g. A toy pushchair is lighter and easier to handle than a real pushchair, obviously, and very enjoyable for a small child to push around.

stargirl1701 Tue 28-Jul-15 15:40:42

YABU. The child will still play as most humans children have throughout time. Toys, as we know them, are pretty recent invention in the scale of human history. I have found 'real' stuff more engaging with my 2. Babies love pots, pans and wooden spoons. My 2 year old loves her plastic spray bottle and sponge for 'cleaning'. Pinterest is full of ideas for fine motor development without toys.

He does need books though!

53rdAndBird Tue 28-Jul-15 15:40:55

It does seem odd, but as long as he has plenty of other things to play with around the house then it's not like he's missing out? Mine is that age and will play with the laundry, the recycling, the newspaper, the remote control, and generally whatever's around. House is still a sea of brightly-coloured plastic crap though

NowSissyThatWalk Tue 28-Jul-15 15:44:20

Do you know if he has books or is read to, OP?

stargirl1701 Tue 28-Jul-15 15:45:06

stargirl1701 Tue 28-Jul-15 15:50:50

howabout Tue 28-Jul-15 15:52:25

I was thinking Montessori too.

My DD1 had very few toys at this age as we were between homes for the first 2 years of her life. This did not mean she had nothing to play with. Front room is now covered in cars, lego and dinosaurs belonging to DD3.

I often see parents use toys as a substitute for interacting with DC and that concerns me more.

ollieplimsoles Tue 28-Jul-15 15:54:14

Sounds like they are attempting Montessori style parenting.

Montessori kids ARE allowed toys but you just have to set them out in a way they can access them themselves and don't put to many out at a time as this can over stimulate them.

ollieplimsoles Tue 28-Jul-15 15:54:41

sorry bit of a X post with howabout!

ErrolTheDragon Tue 28-Jul-15 15:54:57

Through the ages, children who haven't had toys have made them - wooden spoon 'dollies' etc. Of course there's lots of 'real' things a child can play with, but some of them aren't really such a good idea - remote controls for instance contain easily-removed batteries.

Would a child really get more 'overstimulated' banging a toy xylophone than a set of saucepan lids?

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