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To have refused to change DD3‘s outfit?

(39 Posts)
Esmesgirls Wed 22-Jul-15 22:14:07

We were having some photos done today as a family, and MIL rang and asked if she could be in a few and watch. Last week, I went shopping for some new clothes for the DDs- really lovely dresses that suited their colouring and went with what DH and I would be wearing. However, we were getting some individual ones done at the start for DD3 (1 month) and MIL suddenly produced a new outfit and said she wanted to buy some photos of her granddaughter dressed nicely for herself! The outfit was a pink babies tutu, huge ruffle crochet headband and white t-shirt with DD 3s name (spelt wrong!) sewn on, and MIL refused to accept that I didn't want to wake up my peacefully sleeping baby, put her in an itchy outfit and then change her again. She was then horrible about the DDs clothes and refused to be in any of the pictures. I offered to let her put the outfit on DD3 at the end when we were done, at which point MIL refused because she said I'd spoilt the whole day for her and wasted her money! DD1 was upset because MIL said she could have looked a lot nicer if it wasn't for me, and the whole atmosphere of the day was spoilt. AIBU to think if I pay for the shooting, the pictures and the outfits, I get to decide what happens?
I have seen some of the photos, and even with mil's dark cloud, my DDs look stunning to me!

WhyStannisWhy Wed 22-Jul-15 22:16:14

She sounds like a brat. YANBU, although there will no doubt be someone come along and tell you that you should have woken DD3 and put her in a daft, uncomfortable outfit to keep MIL happy.

queentroutoftroutss Wed 22-Jul-15 22:17:08


Theycallmemellowjello Wed 22-Jul-15 22:19:07

She's behaved horribly, but do you think she may have gone to a big effort with the weird outfit for dd3 (getting the tshirt made etc) and then felt embarrassed and rejected when you told her no? Her feeling upset does not excuse but may explain her behaviour.

Ruledbycatsandkids6 Wed 22-Jul-15 22:19:33

She's sounds very nasty op. What a Shame she tried to spoil the day. People are very silly.

LilyMayViolet Wed 22-Jul-15 22:19:41

Seriously? She sounds like an absolute nightmare! Is she usually like this?

SquinkiesRule Wed 22-Jul-15 22:20:45

Your MIL is acting like a 5 year old. Treat her like one.

Zeitgeistic Wed 22-Jul-15 22:21:21

YANBU. Your MIL sounds like very hard work indeed.

Rivercam Wed 22-Jul-15 22:23:11

Spoiled the day for her! It wasn't her day to spoil. She didn't even ask if she could bring an alternative outfit. Don't feel guilty, your mil was the one at fault, not you.

LittleBearPad Wed 22-Jul-15 22:23:54

Yanbu. The outfit sounds grim. And the spelling mistake. I'd be passed off she couldn't spell dgd's name.

whois Wed 22-Jul-15 22:25:04

Yeah MIl sound horrible.

WanderingTrolley1 Wed 22-Jul-15 22:26:44


LaLyra Wed 22-Jul-15 22:28:38

Even if the outfit was fabulous and to my taste I wouldn't have changed my child into a top with their name spelt wrong!

YANBU. MIL should book her own session if she wants to dictate clothing choices.

Iwasbornin1993 Wed 22-Jul-15 22:34:12

YANBU just for the spelling mistake alone before you even take into consideration anything else! She sounds a nightmare hmm

Esmesgirls Wed 22-Jul-15 22:45:57

Thank you! DD3s name is Jacoba (Jacko-ber) and MIL insists on pronouncing it as Jacoba-a (both mine and DH's fathers were called Jacob and DD3 named thus) and so spells it Jaycoba! It's so frustrating- even on congratulations cards a few of MILS friends have sent are spelt this way so she's evidently telling people her choice!

Hexadecimal1 Wed 22-Jul-15 22:49:40

She sounds like a nightmare, but thanks for telling us the name! Drives me mad when people say "she mispronounces the name" and then don't tell you what it is

Lovely name. V unusual for both you and partners dads names to be Jacob!

Aeroflotgirl Wed 22-Jul-15 22:54:29

Your MIL is a brat, never tell her anything again. Lovely name smile

FortyCoats Wed 22-Jul-15 23:00:23

"Pay for the shooting" grin

For just a second I though you wanted to know if paying for a hit on your MIL was reasonable!

Oh and yanbu

Esmesgirls Wed 22-Jul-15 23:00:37

Hexa, our mothers are both Janet as well!

FortyCoats Wed 22-Jul-15 23:01:01


Hexadecimal1 Wed 22-Jul-15 23:01:47

Errrr, awkward question here - you and your dp aren't related are you?! He's not also your brother.....?

TheRealAmyLee Wed 22-Jul-15 23:08:43

YANBU. Did your DH get involved at all?

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks Wed 22-Jul-15 23:28:01

PMSL Hexadecimal1

TryToEngageBrainFirst Thu 23-Jul-15 00:57:36

Are you a traveller family?

Discopanda Thu 23-Jul-15 03:06:29

That's a very strange question to ask, TryToEngage, could I ask you why you want to know if they're a traveller family and what significance it may hold?

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