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My son wants to wear a skirt.

(43 Posts)
Thebestusernamesaretaken Fri 17-Jul-15 13:50:27

My son is 5 and has recently told me he doesn't want to be a boy any more, he wants to be a girl! He has gone as far as pointing out school skirts in asda and saying he wants to wear one to school. I draw the line at that but wibu to let him have a non school skirt?

waffilyversati1e Fri 17-Jul-15 13:53:06

I haven't been in this situation so can only guess at how I would feel in your shoes but my gut says yes, do it. The skirt is not important, his individuality and feeling of being safe to be what he wants to be (even at 5) is.

HedgehogAtHome Fri 17-Jul-15 13:56:17

When I was his age I was insisting on wearing trousers. grin Mother had to argue with the school.

Did me no harm. I wanted to 'be' a boy. Quite happy as a grown woman now, just seemed the only way into the other side of the gender stereotype as I wasn't happy with the side I was on.

Thebestusernamesaretaken Fri 17-Jul-15 13:57:08

It doesn't worry me and I'm happy for him to do so but I didn't know if it would generally been seen as acceptable. )Particularly as my abusive ex is extremely homophobic)

TheCountessofFitzdotterel Fri 17-Jul-15 13:58:14

Yes, let the kid have a skirt.

TrueBlueYorkshire Fri 17-Jul-15 14:02:29

Without mixing things like gender and sexuality into the equation one of the things as a parent you should be doing is showing your son social norms.

While a boy may wear a skirt etc it is up to yourself to decide what social normals you want your son to be raised to.

TheWernethWife Fri 17-Jul-15 14:04:04

You could always buy him a kilt - men/boys look very handsome in them.

RiverTam Fri 17-Jul-15 14:07:01

But surely you can do bith? I have taught DD that boys can wear a dress or skirt (just as she can wear trousers) but that it's more usual for them not too. So she knows the social norm but she also knows that not everyone has to conform to it.

OP, what about done dressing up stuff?

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Fri 17-Jul-15 14:07:06

My son is in his 20s now but as a small child he wanted to wear skirts, tutus and ribbons in his hair so he did. I have never quite understood why it is acceptable, in our society, for girls to wear trousers and shorts but it isn't acceptable for boys to wear skirts?

WorraLiberty Fri 17-Jul-15 14:07:17

If these threads get any more common, boys will start to rebel and actually want to wear trousers just to be different! grin

leedy Fri 17-Jul-15 14:07:19

I'd let him wear the skirt, to be honest. One of my friend's (identical) male preschooler twins is a big fan of more "girly" stories, etc. and occasionally goes out in a princess dress over his jeans, while his bro is in more classic male garb. May be a phase, may not be, nobody makes a fuss about it.

Also, as a PP said, kilts are unisex.

itaintmebabe Fri 17-Jul-15 14:07:26

I've got 2 boys, 5 yo and 9 yo, and I e have always let them wear skirts or dresses if they have wanted to. It hasn't been that often though and my eldest wouldn't dream of doing it anymore. I just don't want them restricted by gender, society will "teach" them soon enough anyway.

saturnvista Fri 17-Jul-15 14:10:16

For his sake, unless this turns out to be a major issue, I would compromise with a kilt.

CallMeExhausted Fri 17-Jul-15 14:10:46

I was about to say that my DH wears a kilt and looks fine in it, if I say so myself

If the school will be a struggle, get him a kilt from a charity shop for non school hours. If gender identity issues are legitimately on the horizon, at least you'll not be shaming DS now...

AuntieStella Fri 17-Jul-15 14:16:16

When they're only 5, it's hard to know whether there's anything more to 'I want to be a girl' than there is to 'I want to be zebra/walrus/spaceman/alien/wizard'.

Let him have the skirt.

MogTheForgetfulCat Fri 17-Jul-15 17:56:49

My Ds is 7 and has 2 dresses and 2 nighties. He asked a few months ago (just turned 7, I think) and at the moment he wears them mostly at home. He has worn them when friends from school come round (or when his older brother has friends round) and as far as I know this has never (yet) been an issue or resulted in any unkindness or teasing.

Don't know if it's a phase. He has always liked pretty, sparkly, lovely things, and I think for him at this point it's as simple as girls' clothes are nicer and prettier than boys' clothes. He hasn't ever said he wants to be a girl. I would get your DS a skirt smile.

FirstWeTakeManhattan Fri 17-Jul-15 18:07:48

When they're only 5, it's hard to know whether there's anything more to 'I want to be a girl' than there is to 'I want to be zebra/walrus/spaceman/alien/wizard

Absolutely agree with this. He's five - it's not an issue at all. My DS, 5 wants to wear blue nail varnish, because his friend (also boy) does. He occasionally wants to dress up as Princess Jasmine. Let him have the skirt, he'll enjoy it, and probably move on from it very soon, if my DC's attention span is anything to go by.

cailindana Fri 17-Jul-15 18:11:11

My 4 year old wears a dress now and again. I can't see how it's any different to wearing any other clothes really - what could be 'unacceptable' about it?

YouBastardSockBalls Fri 17-Jul-15 18:12:15

He'll be teased.

Fatmomma99 Fri 17-Jul-15 18:12:23

I don't see anything wrong with it.

And whether it's a phase or an indication of how he's going to want to be in the future, it's it better/nicer/kinder to go with it and support him.

If he wants to wear skirts at 20+ what you would or wouldn't allow at 5 won't make a difference to whether he does or not.
But you can help how he feels about himself.

cailindana Fri 17-Jul-15 18:13:46

Is that a reason not to allow him to do it SockBalls?

RachelRagged Fri 17-Jul-15 18:14:03

Meh , let him have the skirt.

My sons have never asked for skirts or bras but my youngest did go through a phase of wearing my nightie or bra even, while his DB liked to wear a jumper of mine or a T Shirt for a short while.

None of them wear such anymore .

TheHouseOnBellSt Fri 17-Jul-15 18:19:50

Things are changing. Will Smith's son Jayden wears one quite often.

TheHouseOnBellSt Fri 17-Jul-15 18:20:55

And another....he wore one to prom too.

glamourousgranny42 Fri 17-Jul-15 18:21:25

"He'll be teased"
Well deal with the ignorant people that tease him then. I hate it when people trot out the line that any child who is different in any way should conform because of
the possibilty of teasing. How about we bring our children up to be tolerant and celebrate difference. My children wouldnt tease a boy in a dress, or a child with gay parents or who was overweight or mixed race or disabled. Its not inevitable ffs

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