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That people don't update threads

(22 Posts)
Nannylookingforafamily Thu 16-Jul-15 15:35:49

Honestly, it's so annoying when someone starts a thread and then doesn't come back to update.

Especially threads where a child is poorly and the parent is asking what to do... Often left with, we are on the way to A&E.
Ofcourse, the child comes first, but even after a week there is no update..

Lweji Thu 16-Jul-15 22:53:53


LeChien Thu 16-Jul-15 22:55:02

They really need to sort out their priorities!

ilovesooty Thu 16-Jul-15 22:56:01

Of course they should realise they have a responsibility to the MN readership. hmm

Mrsmorton Thu 16-Jul-15 22:59:49

I do find it frustrating when (for me) the thread title is "any dentists about" and I reply to the OP and ask some more questions and there's no response. I think why bother posting in the first place?

But sometimes life gets in the way. So YABU/YANBU. smile

AGnu Thu 16-Jul-15 23:04:07

I had to abandon my live labour thread while being transferred in from my home birth. One of the first things I said to DH after DS was born & the medical staff had stopped fussing round was "can you update my MN thread for me?" He spent so much time faffing about it that I snatched the phone off him & updated myself while giving DS his first feed.

I expect the same level of commitment from all other thread-starters. wink

Optimist1 Thu 16-Jul-15 23:19:08

That's the standard of dedication we want, AGnu !

Fatmomma99 Thu 16-Jul-15 23:27:25

The problem with MN (and prob other forums) is that you grow to care, and when someone doesn't come back to update (i.e. there is no closure) you're just left hanging.

And sometimes that leaves you wondering how genuine the thread is (esp if it is asking a question).

So I get what you mean!

A final answer should be compulsory to joining/being allowed to psot, shouldn't it!

FlatWhiteToGo Thu 16-Jul-15 23:38:35

Nanny - it's been half a day and you haven't come back to update us. Outrageous!

On a serious note, I've noticed that and I wonder whether some threads are bollocks/people making things up because they're bored hmm. I'm quite cynical though!

SwedishEdith Thu 16-Jul-15 23:52:37

I was thinking today about the person who was nearly dying on a train and was directed to the London Eye Hospital. Maybe they actually died. Still should have got someone to tell us though.

LondonRocks Thu 16-Jul-15 23:56:02

Edith, that came to mind with me, too. I hope she was ok, but I feared the worst, as she updated several times, then nada.

Sgtmajormummy Fri 17-Jul-15 00:20:21

Sometimes I suspect they've made it all up and are laughing at the "gullible" MNers gasping for an update.
Annoying alright.

CactusAnnie Fri 17-Jul-15 02:18:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

totallybewildered Fri 17-Jul-15 02:39:15

I think we just have to accept that RL is more important, and MN, while fun and helpful, is a side line.

totallybewildered Fri 17-Jul-15 02:40:22

Actually, people who have invented a thread are probably ore likely to come back and update in full detail, wherreas in reality, a genuine thread may well be forgotton or abandoned.

CactusAnnie Fri 17-Jul-15 02:47:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nannylookingforafamily Sat 18-Jul-15 00:50:43

I said in my OP, even after a week...

Ofcourse I'm not expecting the same day, but once everything is settled

Lweji Sun 19-Jul-15 10:00:28

Like I said.
So rude that we can't satisfy our need to know about other people's lives.
How regularly do you think they should update? Weekly? Monthly too much?

FenellaFellorick Sun 19-Jul-15 10:18:00

I know there are threads where you're really interested to know how it turned out. There's a couple I still think about from years ago!

It's normal to wonder but we have to remind ourselves that posting on mn doesn't constitute a contract and someone may well just not give us 'closure' and that's ok because it's their story not ours.

I think there are several reasons. Troll, forgot, very bad outcome, and fear. Because sometimes people have a thread that is awful - abusive relationship, crisis with friend, whatever. And mners pile on and tell them to do this that or the other, usually lifechanging and painful things with a timescale of 38 minutes.

And we all know that fab as we are grin there's an element of WHAT? YOU DID NOT DO AS ORDERED? WHY DID YOU POST? WHATS THE POINT OF YOU? I FEEL SORRY FOR YOUR KIDS...

so when people know their update is likely to get a bad reaction, it's easier to just not come back. Which is sad.

Raasay Sun 19-Jul-15 10:29:30

Threads are at least some of the time real life, not soap operas. If the poster asks for help, and gets it surely that's enough?

If a stranger on a train asked me for advice I wouldn't feel entitled to an update.

LazyLouLou Sun 19-Jul-15 11:29:13

If you need to know the conclusions to real life nightmares try all those lovely "Womens Weekly Magazines". They always complete the titillation no, erm, emotion orgy no, erm Nosy Parkerfest ah ha, the tale of personal woe.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Sun 19-Jul-15 11:32:27

You're investing too much thought on this.

Once the dust has settled on the OP's predicament perhaps updating mn and curious posters isn't on their radar.

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