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To wonder what became of the 'popular' crowd at schools

(352 Posts)
Tistheseasonbear Wed 15-Jul-15 23:29:25

The 'popular' crowd always seem to dominate every year group in every school.
I remember at my school the popular group had around 30 people in it and would always be doing things you shouldn't do such as smoking on the field at playtime, drinking and sex, always the most fashionable, faces full of make up and lots of bitchiness etc( thank goodness that was all before social media!!) Anyone who wasn't in the crowd seemed to want to be and they were certainly the 'powerful' ones of the year group.

Why is it that this group seems to exist everywhere?

Most of the 'popular' group from my school are no longer friends and the majority of them had babies young and didn't aspire to a career. Barely any of them went to university either. Is this the same in most of the 'popular' groups? What happened to the people in yours?

avocadotoast Wed 15-Jul-15 23:30:48

Same, I think. Most had kids really young. A couple didn't, but they were exceptions to the rule.

madamginger Wed 15-Jul-15 23:34:12

Same at my school and now they all seem to be selling juice plus and youique and flouncing on Facebook
The real geeks that I hung about with are doctors and scientists and one is even a TV presenter grin

AlpacaMyBags Wed 15-Jul-15 23:37:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Samcro Wed 15-Jul-15 23:39:43

well I have noticed that they are now just normal people..

arethereanyleftatall Wed 15-Jul-15 23:41:56

Yup, same here, being in the cool gang at school seems to be inversely proportional to success as an adult.

LamppostInWinter Wed 15-Jul-15 23:42:18

Mostly very successful, still good looking, have travelled the world, now at late 20s starting to settle down with marriages and families.

15 year old me would have seethed at that, but to be honest at our school by 6th form everyone had settled down to rub along together. There were some truly nasty people in that crowd but most of them were just normal people like anyone else!

Funnily enough our popular crowd were the ones who weren't drinking, smoking, shagging etc - that was my reprobate group!

travertine Wed 15-Jul-15 23:42:41

The top bitch at my school who I was friends with whenever I was needed is now very insecure and funnily enough selling Younique. She seems like a great mum tho and lovely and we talk quite a bit but she is very different to who I knew back then.

arethereanyleftatall Wed 15-Jul-15 23:43:17

And they all seem to look much older, more haggard, than the rest of us non cool kids.

DancingDinosaur Wed 15-Jul-15 23:48:08

I was in it. I did ok. Went to uni, 2 degrees, good job etc. Am in touch with all of them via fb. 14 in total. Some went on to have babies young, others went on to get really good jobs, doctors, surgeons etc. No one is looking particularly old and haggard though. No different to anyone else anyway.

SerialBox Wed 15-Jul-15 23:48:25

I was one of the girls in that group but it wasn't the popular group. The popular group were the rich ones.

I can't speak for others but me personally. Left school at 15 moved out at 16 (moved back twice for max 1 year). Got a low paid job worked my arse off and moved up. Had a bad relationship, had another but married this one at 22, had a baby at 22 left at 22. Now 26, good job, moving to a new job in August in a primary school, amazing boyfriend and still friends with some from school but mostly moved on with new friends and grew up as everyone tends to. My teenage years were troubled. My early 20s were fucking hard. But I've come out the other side and I'm damn proud of it too.

Life knocks everyone, the popular crowd, the shy ones, the clowns etc. I don't think about school much. Those years were not my happiest years. I don't really think about the people I went to school with and didn't keep in touch with either.

If you looked at the shy girls of my year some haven't made great successes of their lives but it's their lives. They may be happy they may not. The popular girls - same. I guess I think ultimately everyone is the same. School doesn't define you, life does.

Theycallmemellowjello Wed 15-Jul-15 23:51:28

I was a mega geek at school so I definitely suffer from similarly bitter instincts about the populars. However in my old age I have learned
1.that they are individuals not a monolithic group,
2. That they were mostly just getting on with life so are not really deserving of bitterness,
3. That good social skills are an asset - young people's popularity is not going to hold them back (sorry), and
4. Holding on to bitterness however does hold you back. So I would try not to obsess over whether miss popular peaked at age 15.

Ruledbycatsandkids6 Wed 15-Jul-15 23:54:55

So so many cliches and generalisations in the op where to start.

So popular people are 'thick' and thick people have children young?

Popular people smoke, drink, wear face full of makeup?

What a nasty post.

And no actually from my 80s days my all girls school was pretty nice and we all got on more or less.

My kids range from 25 to 16 and had big circles of diverse friends at their huge comp. All abilities and all types. Some have now had kids and are doing well and guess what some who had kids young actually managed to get qualifications and degrees.

I have to say my children know a lot of others from private schools where queen and king bees are rife and bullying is widespread.

Maybe you need to pick better schools for your children.

HarrietSchulenberg Wed 15-Jul-15 23:56:49

The popular ones in my year were more of a self-appointed elite. The monied, confident, mini-middle-aged ones. They mostly had successful parents in good jobs and hadn't worked out that respect must be earned, not inherited. They honestly believed they were above everyone else. So much so that I don't think they even registeted that I, and others, got better O and A level grades then they did: even now one of them has boasted that she got the highest female A level grades in that year (she didn't because I did).

I wouldn't mind but the bastards mostly went on to become their parents in that are successful and have money.

Everyone else in the year hated them, though grin.

notquitehuman Thu 16-Jul-15 00:00:02

The most popular girl at school used to pick on me and call me a lesbian. She's off to Brighton Pride this year. She's not LGBT, it's just a piss up for her and her mates. Glad she got over her homophobia.

One bitchy girl is quite a successful runway model, but many of them are just normal mums now. I'm sure once the hormones settled down they changed. I was probably a bit of a bitch myself, I guess there's a hierarchy in these things.

Icantbelieveitsnotbutter Thu 16-Jul-15 00:00:32

The popular kids from my school have turned out average.

Some look really old and are selling unique crap and crap like that on facebook.

The geeky crowd are doing well for themselves.

HarrietSchulenberg Thu 16-Jul-15 00:01:43

Well weren't you lucky, ruledbycats.
Please tell me how my parents were supposed to know what the other children in my year would be like before I even started high school? And how I can acquire this talent that you have to "pick better schools" for my kids?

FWIW my school was, and still is, considered one of the best in the entire county and has a waiting list of 35 just for Y7. What else should I be looking for?

ralphlauren Thu 16-Jul-15 00:03:03

Dd 14 (year 9) said that there is a group 'of populars' who parade around in make up face full of slap and always uploading same selfies screaming look at me!

Same group go to parties and look awful half cut in their selfies.
I'm glad she isn't in the gang tbh.

NickiFury Thu 16-Jul-15 00:05:15

I typed out a description of how all there lives have turned out and how rough they all look but it would get me roasted so I deleted it.

Still true though. The nice ones all seem to be living nice happy lives, the not so nice ones are not and they show their experiences on their faces.

WorraLiberty Thu 16-Jul-15 00:08:37

I think they're just mainly getting on with their lives

The same as the bitter kids who were eaten up with jealousy about the popular kids, and spent their time bitching about them. Not understanding the irony of bitching about the bitches.

I hope they all just grew up to be nice, normal people.

From what I've seen, many certainly seem to have but who knows what goes on in their minds.

AmyGDalae Thu 16-Jul-15 00:18:42

I never was one of the popular kids, but recently met up with what used to be one of the in-crowds (they still see each other a few times a year).
They are just the same as most people in our year. Good degrees, with the majority having done PhDs, MBAs and co, having travelled extensively, lived or currently living abroad, hardly anyone has kids. We are all late 20s/early 30s and I only know of five people (in our year of ~50) who have kids yet. One of the popular girls is one of the ones with a kid. She's still with her highschool boyfriend and they had a kid in the last year of their PhDs.

Ruledbycatsandkids6 Thu 16-Jul-15 00:22:33

harriet I think your 'considered one of the best in the country' might be a clue.

In my experience it's the snobby richer elements that contain the hierarchy and popular kids squad.

At my kids comp there were kids from care, to kids from huge fuck off houses. The bigger the school
And the more diverse the population the more accepting and sensible the kids.

So choose wisely.

MaggieJoyBlunt Thu 16-Jul-15 00:24:04

I think it['s a joke thread.

CainInThePunting Thu 16-Jul-15 00:27:57

Yep, same here. They calved at a young age and still live in our home smalltown.

According to FB (funnily enough, they sent me friend requests) pics they all look haggard and depressed.

I passed up on a recent reunion.

Ruledbycatsandkids6 Thu 16-Jul-15 00:29:18

Just pisses me off when people equate looks and makeup and having kids young to being thick, bitchy and unsuccessful. Pathetic.

Actually I do remember one unpleasant girl at my school and she was clever and a vicars daughter. Never wore makeup and had bunches at 16! Silly bitch.

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