To think I physically might not be able to get on the plane...

[LilyKiwi]

Due to fly back from NZ in 2 weeks (been here 8 months) and I am so scared of flying I'm terrified I won't physically be able to get on the plane. I know it's ridiculous, but I work myself up feeling like I have had 'premonitions' or bad feelings about crashing and that I'm ignoring it all and condemning my family by letting them board the plane. I'll be flying with dh, 4 yr old ds and 11 month old ds, so worrying about the plans crashing should be the least of my problems. I'm not normally so nuts, I have been looking at alternative options but have to start work after maternity leave a week after returning to the UK, so can't really board a vessel ship for 3 months. Help!!

[BettyCatKitten]

I hate flying too, you have my sympathy. Can you access a surgery and get some anti anxiety meds? I know you'll have to pay, but it will be worth it. Good luck!

[LilyKiwi]

I was thinking of that, but as it's such a long flight with a child and a baby I worry about zoning myself out! Also I worry if there was a crash and I was on medication and survived I wouldn't be able to get the children out. I am actually a little bit ridiculous aren't I?

[BettyCatKitten]

No your not ridiculous, you're anxious and fearful. I understand as I'd be the same. I haven't been on a plane for 20 years .
Something like beta blockers will help to slow your heart rate, but not affect you cognitively. A relaxant like diazepam should help your anxiety (hopefully!) but if there was an emergency (which there won't be) your fight or flight response and adrenalin will kick in.

[chibi]

I take diazepam as needed on flights.

It makes me postcaring but I am still lucid and confident I could respond in an emergency. That was my big concern two, as I fly with my two children. My gp reassured me that it was safe

I take one at night as well for the two nights before flying to help with anxiety.

It isn't rational, and so I don't think you can logic your way out of it. I can't, anyway. Drugs help, and that's ok.

[DragonWithAGirlTattoo]

go and see if you can get on a fly without fear course, my son (refused to get on a plane AT ALL!!!) now enjoys flying!

[LilyKiwi]

Thank you, I might arm myself with that info and find myself a doctor's surgery. I wasn't this terrified until I had kids. Must also stop myself from sending final goodbye messages just in case from the departure lounge again, always a bit when you survive.

[LilyKiwi]

Dragon where did your son do that? Sounds good.

[thatsshallot]

I have those exact same fears about meds making you not safe - but recently took lots of diazepam for dental work and was totally compus just didn't panic - so would have been fine in an emergency.

The naysayer in me also thinks surely if the plane was to crash with my family on it would be better to go down with them than survive? Sorry if that's not helpful . .

Please do give valium a go, and see what the airline can offer. I downloaded loads of podcasts and white noise apps too to toally disconnect - that really helped as well.

Good luck

[Gottagetmoving]

I was terrified of flying and refused for years, I felt ridiculously anxious when I flew first time going on holiday with my sisters. I was so bad that whilst boarding, one sister was infront of me and one behind just in case I made an escape dash.
I was not too bad once we were flying but I had to occupy my mind to stop me stressing. I wish I had had children with me to distract me!
I don't think you would be too spaced out on diazepam. The doctor can give you several 2mg tablets ( I believe you can take up to 6 of them at once?) but you could take a couple and then if needed take another one every few hours if needed. It doesn't make you incompetent but just stops you dwelling on the negative thoughts.

[LilyKiwi]

24 hours, fuck, fuck, fuck I can't do it!!

[blankblink]

Have a look at this site, it shows you how many aircraft are in the air at any location realtime. www.flightradar24.com/51.5,-0.13/7

You can watch them NOT falling out of the sky if it helps

Try some self-help www.huffingtonpost.com/nick-ortner/fear-of-flying_b_1658900.html

You'll be fine, honestly

[LilyKiwi]

Ok, thanks all, drugs has to be the way forward. It's the thought of the fear if the plane went down that gets me more than the event itself. Yuck, might go and be sick.

[BettyCatKitten]

Sending you calm, positive vibes op. You can do it

[LilyKiwi]

Oh this app is great, thank you!