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about my BiL & my sons christening

(79 Posts)
lovelyconverse123 Tue 07-Jul-15 21:43:09

Going to give as little detail as possible in order to not cloud peoples opinion. Basically BiL was asked to be godfather for my son who is being christened in 2 weeks. He accepted. Its a special day and a formal occasion. At my insistence my dh contacted him and asked him (a) to wear a suit & (b) to shave off his (scraggy) beard (not being grown for religious/work reasons). He texted back saying he'd wear as suit but wouldn't shave and we could ask someone else if that was what we wanted. So I did ask someone else & texted BiL to tell him I had asked someone else and see you there on the day. He said himself & his family wouldn't be there. I said that's a pity but see you another time. WIBU ?

LucilleBluth Tue 07-Jul-15 21:44:40

Yep, totally unreasonable. You can't dictate his facial hair preferences. It's a bit weird imo.

PresidentTwonk Tue 07-Jul-15 21:44:54


TopCivilServant Tue 07-Jul-15 21:45:01

Of course YABU!

nilbyname Tue 07-Jul-15 21:45:02

You were v unreasonable. Your poor bil, he has a big beard so can't be a godfather?

I call reverse.

LittleBearPad Tue 07-Jul-15 21:45:39


You decided your child's godparent on the basis of his facial hair. I'm stunned.

You were being staggeringly unreasonable.

shock FFS

TheMoa Tue 07-Jul-15 21:45:44

Yes, you were utterly unreasonable - to the point where I assume this is a reverse hmm

Ohfourfoxache Tue 07-Jul-15 21:46:02

Erm, sorry but yes I think yabu.

You chose someone else because he wouldn't get rid of his beard?

Chillyegg Tue 07-Jul-15 21:46:34


cuntycowfacemonkey Tue 07-Jul-15 21:47:01

Reverse thread how tedious

eckythumpenallthat Tue 07-Jul-15 21:47:35

Yes yabu. You pick god parents for the influence and help and support they will provide to your child. Not by how they look for so e photos at a christening!

mmollytoots Tue 07-Jul-15 21:47:45

you are ridiculous. yabu

AuntyMag10 Tue 07-Jul-15 21:47:49

Yabu, what does a beard have to do with being a gf? Getting someone else and your text back was quite rude too.

TopCivilServant Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:07

Ugh. Stupid reverse. Stop it please angry

kewtogetin Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:30

You were massively unreasonable, you thought so much of this man that you were prepared to make him a godfather to your child but then withdrew the offer when he refused to shave?! I wouldn't have told you I wasn't coming if I were him, I'd have told you to fuck off to the far side of fuck and counted my blessings that I'd never have to see you again. How does someone's facial hair affect their ability to be a godparent??

QuiteLikely5 Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:35

Can you breathe up there in your ivory tower?

Shapebandit Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:37

Wow crazy behaviour. How would you feel if a good friend asked you to be a bridesmaid but then specified you had to have your hair cut short to do it??

Haffdonga Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:48

I've heard of a bridezilla but, OP, you are officially the first Christeningzilla

Congratulations you are a New U Thing.

MrsBungle Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:51

My god. Of course you're unreasonable.

mollypollly Tue 07-Jul-15 21:48:59

Utterly absurd.

What's a reverse thread?!

OddBoots Tue 07-Jul-15 21:49:01

Yes, YABU. The way he grows his hair is none of your business.

diploddycus Tue 07-Jul-15 21:49:07


PurpleDaisies Tue 07-Jul-15 21:49:26

You didn't seriously ask your bil to shave his beard did you? How would you have felt of he'd stipulated you had to have a hair cut before coming to a family event? I'm hoping there's more to this than you've described because you sound totally unreasonable.

elfycat Tue 07-Jul-15 21:49:28

I second the reverse option.

Facial hair is a personal preference personally I loathe them and my DDs have a scraggy-faced godfather.

The BIL would be within his rights to tell you to FOTTFSOF... forever.

TinyManticore Tue 07-Jul-15 21:49:55

Is this a reverse? shock You can't go around telling other people how much facial hair they can have!

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