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To still not know whether or not to go for interview?

(95 Posts)
elderflowerlemonade Wed 01-Jul-15 11:18:31

I have an interview for a teaching position.

If I were to be offered the post, my salary would effectively be wiped out by childcare costs. I would have two very young children (both under 2) in full time childcare. There would be few if any financial benefits as a result.

But there are all the usual arguments for going back to work - I am a crap SAHM; I am bored; my pension and so on.

But DH keeps saying why don't i just leave it another year so DD has some free hours and I will in his words make a profit and I am reluctantly seeing what he means.

WIBU to pull out? It does seem a bit stupid ...

mmollytoots Wed 01-Jul-15 11:24:54

Go to the interview anyway whst have you got to lose

mmollytoots Wed 01-Jul-15 11:25:14

it will sharpen your interview skills anyway and you can get feedback etc

ilovesooty Wed 01-Jul-15 11:25:24

It doesn't matter that your salary would be wiped out in the early stages. It's an investment in your future. Your being at home facilitates his employment and childcare is a joint expense.

Now get to the interview and pay no attention to him. He'll pull this stunt every time otherwise.

OvertiredandConfused Wed 01-Jul-15 11:28:45

Go for the interview - you're interviewing them too to see if it's right for you.

Polishing interview skills is never a bad thing!

elizadolittlechoc Wed 01-Jul-15 11:30:35

Do supply and choose your hours and days.

pinkdelight Wed 01-Jul-15 11:31:38

"It doesn't matter that your salary would be wiped out in the early stages. It's an investment in your future. Your being at home facilitates his employment and childcare is a joint expense."

^^ This times a million.

PoppyFleur Wed 01-Jul-15 11:33:14

Firstly, childcare costs are a family cost so should impact the family budget rather than just your salary. The net result may be that there is no additional money coming in but as you have said, this will be a temporary thing.

Being at home with 2 children under the age of 2 years is really hard work, I bet you are a much better SAHM than you think. But the most important question to ask yourself is do you want to go back to work? Is money the most important factor in this dilemma, does work give you more than just money (enjoyment, mental stimulation, social life)?

Just to note also, a job interview doesn't equal being offered the job, this could be good practice?

AlpacaMyBags Wed 01-Jul-15 11:40:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DragonWithAGirlTattoo Wed 01-Jul-15 11:50:49

how do you know 'he'll pull this stunt every time' - talk about stereotyping/reading more in the OP than stated! it does however need to be your decision

Would it really hurt to delay a year (or 6 months or any time)

I'd go for the interview, use it as practice, see whats available out there?

Hoppinggreen Wed 01-Jul-15 11:58:16

Make your decision when/if you get offered the job

ilovesooty Wed 01-Jul-15 12:00:31

Dragon I don't think much of generalising but in this case I stand by what I said.

hibbledibble Wed 01-Jul-15 12:00:55

Do you want to work?

Is this interview for a full time job?

Could you look for a job share instead?

What about tutoring? You could do this in the evenings and dh could look after the children

MrsLeighHalfpenny Wed 01-Jul-15 12:09:20

What ilovesooty and many others said.

The earlier you're back on the career ladder the better off you'll be financially long term, and the easier it will be.

Have the interview, then make the decision.

elderflowerlemonade Wed 01-Jul-15 12:37:25

I do a bit of tutoring just for a bit of pocket money at the moment but I feel a bit - useless at the moment and isolated.

I feel I have to make the decision now as am about to go to the shops to get a maternity dress I can wear and also I know if I'm in two minds I won't perform well. I need to be clear in my own head that this is the best thing for me and the babies.

fastdaytears Wed 01-Jul-15 12:42:29

You need to do it, even if just to prove to yourself that you can.

Your DH needs to update how he sees childcare cost. Turns out it's 2015 and both parents are responsible...

Your career matters and so does your happiness.

elderflowerlemonade Wed 01-Jul-15 12:44:54

I know but I can see what he means as if our monthly income after all vital expenditure is £4000, and if I go out to work full time and our monthly income is around £4100 - and petrol and working wardrobe too - it does seem a bit childish and pathetic to do so 'because I can.'

fastdaytears Wed 01-Jul-15 12:47:18

That's all well and good but would he see it the same the other way around?

elderflowerlemonade Wed 01-Jul-15 12:48:21

Can you explain that to me - I'm not sure what you mean sorry smile

silveroldie2 Wed 01-Jul-15 12:50:04

Excuse me if I'm ignorant (have no children) but why is childcare just taken from your salary and not a joint thing between your and DH's salaries? I have read this so many times on MN and just don't understand.

YUDOTHIS Wed 01-Jul-15 12:50:47

You're not doing it because you can, you're doing it to build your pension, experience (Which will help you apply for a slightly higher paid role in future) possibility of promotion and to shorten your gap in employment.
Hardly childish, more like sensible.

elderflowerlemonade Wed 01-Jul-15 12:51:33

It's not it's just that full time childcare would cost around £1500-1800 which is pretty much to the penny what I'd earn as a FT teacher so it makes no difference to our overall take home money, if you see what I mean.

Skiptonlass Wed 01-Jul-15 12:51:41

No, HALF your salary will be wiped out by childcare costs. The other half comes from his salary. You need to make that explicitly clear to him. By staying at home, YOUR career is stalled and YOUR lifetime earning potential is lower.

I'd go to the interview. The best protection a woman has is independence. You may not get the job - so what? There's no such thing as a wasted interview in my opinion.

YUDOTHIS Wed 01-Jul-15 12:51:51

Yes, if childcare is 1000 a month for example, why dont you pay 500 and dh pay 500? Its childcare for the children you both created.

elderflowerlemonade Wed 01-Jul-15 12:52:01

Oh thank you YUDO blush flowers

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