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To be really angry with each and everyone of you who has ever moaned about being 'fat'

(282 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

Lookatwhatyouvedone Mon 29-Jun-15 19:39:43

I have daughters. I've worked for years at nurturing their self esteem, reassuring them. Loving them.

Still makes feck all difference to the voices in their heads that tell them that thin and flat, or better still non-existent, is beautiful and having curves is ugly. They are a normal weight. They exercise. They eat sensibly. They aren't happy with their shape. And I think it's all your fault. All of you. Every single one of you who's ever obsessed about your thighs or your tummy or your boobs. Ever single one of you who's bought in to the lie that we can never quite be good enough, could always lose a few pounds, tone a few inches.
Look at what you've done and you still keep doing it. Fat is the demon, thin is the goddess and not a thought for the destruction done. How many threads on here asking how you can reduce yourselves. Not because you actually want to but because you think you should. But it doesn't just harm you does it? It harms all of us and our daughters and our daughters not even born. We talk about the pressure society puts on women but that's bollocks. We are society and we do it to ourselves. You don't talk about being healthy, you talk about being thin.

I am so angry, SO ANGRY, that what I say can't outweigh the damage you've all done. Tomorrow I'm sure I'll be sensible and reasonable and calm and not like this but tonight I'm bloody angry.

AuntyMag10 Mon 29-Jun-15 19:41:06

hmm

manicinsomniac Mon 29-Jun-15 19:42:01

YABVVVVVU

And offensive

What makes your daughters innocent and the rest of us with body image issues the guilty party.

breadstixandhommus Mon 29-Jun-15 19:42:19

I'm fat and I take no responsibility for your DD's image issues, I have my own to deal with.

DoughDoe Mon 29-Jun-15 19:42:35

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

theconstantvacuumer Mon 29-Jun-15 19:42:39

Really? There are much worse problems in this world. Give yourself a talking to.

MrsRaegan Mon 29-Jun-15 19:42:47

Have my very first biscuit

fakenamefornow Mon 29-Jun-15 19:42:57

Oh, my first ever biscuit

ApocalypseThen Mon 29-Jun-15 19:43:00

Eh, yeah, sorry. I'm a bit postnatal and my body looks and feels alien, and yeah, fat. I don't say it to undo your good work, it's how I feel about me today.

AuntyMag10 Mon 29-Jun-15 19:43:05

It's really not my problem at all. Yabvu.

Wideopenspace Mon 29-Jun-15 19:43:40

Erm...aaand, why are the people you are shouting at obsessing about their weight do you think?

Cool, be angry about this issue (and I agree it is a BIIIIIG issue), but you're yelling at the wrong people...

thehumanjam Mon 29-Jun-15 19:43:49

Oh for goodness sake.

gamerchick Mon 29-Jun-15 19:44:08

No teenager is happy with their body. It's only later on you wish you had appreciated it when you had it.

Have a word with yourself.

Reginafalangie Mon 29-Jun-15 19:44:48

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Fabellini Mon 29-Jun-15 19:45:08

I've never bought into it. I think I'm fucking amazing. So it's not my fault your daughters have. Also, they've never met me, I'm no influence in their lives. If they ain't happy, it ain't down to me. Look a little closer to home love.

SideOrderofChips Mon 29-Jun-15 19:45:14

Take your rage elsewhere

Susiesue61 Mon 29-Jun-15 19:45:33

I have a daughter who is 13. She is solidly built and absolutely beautiful. She plays loads of sport and uses her weight for power. She has great self esteem and loads of confidence. We watch loads of programmes like America's next top model etc and comment on the girls and how skinny they are.

Yes she has days where she wishes she was slimmer but I don't blame society for that. You can boost their self esteem and confidence yourself, surely

Weebirdie Mon 29-Jun-15 19:45:48

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Stinkersmum Mon 29-Jun-15 19:46:00

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Rollermum Mon 29-Jun-15 19:46:14

I can see your point but it's misguided to think we can all suddenly reject this for the good of (being generous) future generations / your specific daughters.

Also wanting to lose fat is not always just about being smaller per se. I play sports, I lift weights. Being lighter would help. I'm not interested in smallness and it's insulting to suggest people's relationships with their own bodies are so simplistic.

StupidBloodyKindle Mon 29-Jun-15 19:46:18

biscuit
actually, make that
biscuitbiscuitbiscuitbiscuitbiscuitbiscuitwinebiscuitbiscuitbiscuitcakecakecakebrewbiscuitbiscuitbiscuitcakecake
I am fat because I am fat. I am not 'fat' but even if I were 'fat' and wanted to lose a few pounds then that would be my right.

clairemum22 Mon 29-Jun-15 19:46:23

How ridiculous, lucky you if you've always been happy in your body. Most people aren't so secure.

ShuShuFontana Mon 29-Jun-15 19:46:37

well you can't be very good at the boosting of the self esteem then can you?

it the view nice from up there in your Ivory Tower btw?

ThisIsClemFandango Mon 29-Jun-15 19:46:43

Have a biscuit you sound like you need one.

HarrietSchulenberg Mon 29-Jun-15 19:47:17

Yeah, 'cos it's all Mumsnet's fault hmm. And FWIW, there are some people, me included, who DO need to lose weight to be healthy.

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