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A SAHM walks into a bar...

(41 Posts)
Magalouf Sun 28-Jun-15 20:35:56

And goes to order a round, when one of the guys in the round comes up and says 'I'll get these, I've got a job'.

AIBU to be pissed off! I said it's fine I got it, but he was pretty insistent. I didn't want a scene. He's a friend of DH, who wasn't there at the time.

TheHouseOnBellSt Sun 28-Jun-15 20:37:54

Oh I'd have told him "So have I...I'll get them you twat."

Don't talk to him again; wanker.

pinkyredrose Sun 28-Jun-15 20:38:21

I'd have chucked it over his head! Did he actually think that was funny?

Lj8893 Sun 28-Jun-15 20:39:20

What a prick!!!!

elderflowerlemonade Sun 28-Jun-15 20:39:38

I may have misunderstood, but I don't think he was trying to be horrible? Or was he?

I used to always say to my friends 'I'll get these' if I knew they were between jobs or whatever or I knew there was a discrepancy in what we earned.

Stealthpolarbear Sun 28-Jun-15 20:41:39

I assumed this was the start of a joke!

flora717 Sun 28-Jun-15 20:44:27

It's pretty patronising - assuming somehow they haven't got the sense to know if they can afford it?
Seeking to pay all the time is very trying to wave your money at people, quite tacky.

morethanpotatoprints Sun 28-Jun-15 20:44:45

It wouldn't have bothered me if it was a friend of dh tbh.
I think in a way it's good as it's treating you as an individual rather than an extension of your dh. He has more money than you (personally) as he works, so he'll buy the drinks.

HelenF350 Sun 28-Jun-15 20:46:25

It's pretty awful, I'd have let him buy all the drinks to make up for it! grin

Stealthpolarbear Sun 28-Jun-15 20:48:21

Well that's kind of assuming sahms don't have access to money. Which is a bad situation to be in but I hope few are. This isn't someone who usually works and is out of a job, this is someone who has (I assume) taken an active decision with her oh to pool resources, financial and otherwise.
I wonder if he'd have done the same if the op had been a man?

NickyEds Sun 28-Jun-15 20:48:39

Say cheers and order a magnum of champagne?

romeomorningwhisky Sun 28-Jun-15 20:50:12

Surely I'm not the only person that would have said "okay you big hero that's grand, make mine a double"

Osmiornica Sun 28-Jun-15 20:51:05

So did I Stealth.

Stealthpolarbear Sun 28-Jun-15 20:53:03

Ending
...and walks straight out again cos there's no big man offering to buy her a drink and OBVIOUSLY she can't buy one herself.

Just to be clear. I'm happy when people buy me drinks. I accept graciously. But I'd be pissed off if they simply assumed I couldn't and needed a big strong man to do it for me.

CherylBerylMeryl Sun 28-Jun-15 20:54:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Stealthpolarbear Sun 28-Jun-15 20:57:07

I suspect if the op had been a man he wouldn't have wanted to dent her pride

Stopandlook Sun 28-Jun-15 20:57:14

Yanbu. Am actually speechless.

Mintyy Sun 28-Jun-15 20:57:28

What a wanker!! Yes, I would have changed my drink to a bottle of champagne and seen how his job liked that.

Stealthpolarbear Sun 28-Jun-15 20:59:45

Minty I don't think he planned to claim it. Just felt he had more money than the pp.

paxtecum Sun 28-Jun-15 21:02:11

We don't know the tone that he used.

I went out to dinner with two couples a few weeks ago and the men insisted on paying for me. I thought they were being rather polite and sweet and thanked them. But Maybe they were being patronising wankers.

Magalouf Sun 28-Jun-15 21:04:05

I feel like it was a little dig tbh. I'm new to the SAHM thing, and prob a bit sensitive, but I do think it was a little out of order.

Have been trying to think of a better punch line for the thread title to no avail! wink

namechangefortoday543 Sun 28-Jun-15 21:04:49

"Sorry Im a bit deaf , did you say you are a knob"??? winkwinkwink

Mintyy Sun 28-Jun-15 21:06:48

Never ever EVER assume it is ok to insist on paying for a round when someone else is getting it in because you have more money. It is extraordinarily patronising and disrespectful.

Sagethyme Sun 28-Jun-15 21:16:49

Would you be equally as peeved if it was a female friend? I think it was meant as a friendly gesture with no malice. At the end of my Mat leave (took 12 months) there really was no spare cash for a coffee with friends, i was never offended when they offered to buy me a coffee, and once i was back at work i returned the coffees (with interest in the form of cakegrin) i guess it comes down to how well you all know each other?

Stealthpolarbear Sun 28-Jun-15 21:21:20

Yes I think I would. Although not if it was mat leave related. Temp shortness of cash - fine to offer.
Long term financial situation brought about by careful planning - erm what exactly???

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