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Well I know I am but...must a man have a male voice?

(42 Posts)
EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 13:47:35

Most of the time I feel like I am my DH's personal assistant but every now and again I am stopped in my tracks.

DH is a forriner so the name thing is easy to deal with.

He's been in the UK for 20+ years and needs to change the address on his UK driving licence. Not that simple apparently. I've just phoned up and pretended to be him and the DVLA woman hung up on me.

She said "I don't believe I am speaking to a man"

If it had been DHs brother phoning, or I'd asked the postman to make the call she would have continued.

EatShitDerek Thu 25-Jun-15 13:51:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

longjane Thu 25-Jun-15 13:52:22

Get you DH to phone and then says he gives permission to you to you to to the stuff that needs doing.

realhousewifeoffitzrovia Thu 25-Jun-15 13:52:24

I love you for trying, OP. Did you really try to make your voice sound manly though? Or did you go for more of a David Beckham pitch?

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 13:52:43

I've done that too Derek with my mum sitting next to me. I've "been" my mum and given me permission to speak to the person on the phone.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 13:53:58

LongJane - DH is SO busy at work. I'm at home today. It took me ages to get through.

Housewife - that's the thing. Would they have hung up on David, saying they didn't believe he was a man ha ha.

MitzyLeFrouf Thu 25-Jun-15 13:54:11

You have to imagine you're Grant Mitchell of Eastenders fame when trying to pass yourself off as a man.

DrinkGirlsFeck Thu 25-Jun-15 13:54:31

Umm, of course YABU. The DVLA person had reason to believe she wasn't speaking to the owner of the driving licence. Which, of course, is a legal document that can be used to obtain credit/passport etc etc. I'd be horrified if she had continued.

EatShitDerek Thu 25-Jun-15 13:55:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 13:56:19

Drink - my point is all it takes is for my voice to sound to feminine and she'll speak to whoever has the paperwork in front of them. I could have asked the window cleaner to pretend to my my husband.

The DVLA woman was rude.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 13:56:29

...and stupid

Pumpkinpositive Thu 25-Jun-15 13:57:24

She said "I don't believe I am speaking to a man"

She wants to make sure she doesn't get accused of transphobia. hmm

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Thu 25-Jun-15 13:58:59

Have never had a man with a woman's voice phone up at work. But have several women who have male voices. Its quite confusing. They are actually the person and not a man pretending to be them.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 13:59:08

Derek - I'll go and have a pee (standing up) and growl before I try again. Or maybe I've been blacklisted by now and there's a warning next to DHs name.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 14:01:18

What if DH was a sex change woman (am I allowed to say that) DVLA could be in trouble smile

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 14:02:30

LongJane - I think I will get the postman to phone up and give his permission for me to speak on behalf of my DH.

Naoko Thu 25-Jun-15 14:02:31

She didn't believe she was talking to the person on the license, so good on her for not talking to you, it's a data protection issue (whatever it is that makes her believe you are not him). Of course this raises issues with transgender people or indeed people who simply don't have a very masculine or feminine voice being unable to deal with their own admin unfairly, so it's something they do need to be careful with.

As for your DH's license, I thought you could change the address online? I know renewals are more of a pain if you're not British (I am not and had to do it by post) but I'm sure I've done an address change on the website before.

nikki1978 Thu 25-Jun-15 14:03:11

I can do it for you. Apparently I have a man's voice as people always call me sir on the phone and sometimes my in friends think I am dh when I answer my mobile. Bastards.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 14:04:38

Naoko - "Data protection" does anyone actually know what that entails apart from spouting that off as a reason?

Re his license - he's got an old fashioned paper one not a new card one so it's a new type he needs and a new address. They're asking him to send his passport in plus for one other form of ID. Flip sake.

Gruntfuttock Thu 25-Jun-15 14:07:21

Imagine being a man and people not believing you're a man a man when you speak to them on the phone. sad One of my favorite authors, David Sedaris, has this trouble all the time.

Gruntfuttock Thu 25-Jun-15 14:07:53

Oops, sorry for superflous words above.

Pumpkinpositive Thu 25-Jun-15 14:10:40

Of course this raises issues with transgender people or indeed people who simply don't have a very masculine or feminine voice being unable to deal with their own admin unfairly, so it's something they do need to be careful with.

Also raises issues with Deaf people or people with communication disorders. Unles DVLA provide a text phone or text number, of course.

Companies who refuse to take third party calls on behalf of deaf people (even when the deaf person has previously given permission) are a pain in the arse.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 14:17:53

Pumpkin - that must be a serious problem for some people. I know I'm making light of the situation here but how frustrating for many people who ARE UNABLE to do this themselves.

EvaBee Thu 25-Jun-15 14:19:40

Grunt - yes that would be difficult to deal with. I don't know what the answer is but putting the phone down on someone the way this woman did to me - is not. I could have been David Sedaris, or someone that sounded like him.

peggyundercrackers Thu 25-Jun-15 14:41:10

of course they would know they are dealing with a trans person - said trans person would have had to fill in forms so they can be addressed by their new name - DVLA would have a record of that change on their system...

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