What year exactly, did it become socially unacceptable to swat backsides? About the same time the youth of today went to hell.

(33 Posts)
FastWindow Thu 25-Jun-15 04:17:48

A tap on the hand /paw stops a child/puppy eating stones.

Honestly, you can't beat your kids. But you can't leave them go feral for lack of boundaries either.

When 'No, Tarquin, please don't poke your baby sister in the eye again' doesn't work, or 'that tiny pebble will do your digestive system no good at all, darling' has zero effect, tell me why a quick seat of the hand is going to land me in jail?

Loose boundaries land kids in jail. (thread title right there)

AndThisIsTrue Thu 25-Jun-15 04:22:32

Have you got nothing better to think about at 4am? YABU, go to sleep!

ShowMeYourTARDIS Thu 25-Jun-15 04:22:52

There are a huge number of studies that show smacking can do incredible psychological harm. There can be effective discipline without hitting a child.

GrumpleMe Thu 25-Jun-15 04:31:20

Honestly, you can't beat your kids. But you can't leave them go feral for lack of boundaries either.

Correct. And correct.

Thread closed. grin

FastWindow Thu 25-Jun-15 04:33:34

Grumple, I'll alert the authorities.

Andthisistrue - it's 4am for some.

FastWindow Thu 25-Jun-15 04:34:22

Missed a smile for grumple

karbonfootprint Thu 25-Jun-15 04:36:12

I don't think the youth of today are going to hell any more than the youth of yesterday did, or the youth of a hundred years ago, or the youth of a thousand years ago.

In fact there are records of ancient Greeks bemoaning the same thing.

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Thu 25-Jun-15 04:42:00

Isn't it always 4am for someone? Just a thought.

wink

Hitting children doesn't make a difference. In places with the death penalty there's still just as many crimes...

Plarail123 Thu 25-Jun-15 04:42:00

biscuit

FastWindow Thu 25-Jun-15 04:42:00

True karbon - Plato bemoaned 'the youth' but I doubt he was facing the knife, drug, and social media narcissistic culture we are and the frankly terrifying consequences. Do you live in a town centre you are comfortable with walking around about after dark?

karbonfootprint Thu 25-Jun-15 04:46:14

I live in London, and teach some amazing and wonderful teenagers in a state comp in a "deprived" area, and walk around after dark all the time. i don't have a car, so I have to. I don't always want to or like it, but don't think I am in any more danger from young people than I am from old people.

FastWindow Thu 25-Jun-15 04:49:59

My first biscuit. I'll gracefully retire.

Be assured, I do not beat my dc!

elderflowerlemonade Thu 25-Jun-15 05:04:28

Well, it isn't the 'Tarquins' we have to worry about, is it?

FastWindow Thu 25-Jun-15 05:11:44

No elder it's the parents of the youth of today -

I'm rethinking my point. I think it's the parents who need a well placed hand now.

Marshy Thu 25-Jun-15 05:28:07

If you're going to try to be provocative can't you come up with something a bit more original?

Atenco Thu 25-Jun-15 05:32:13

Back in the day I smacked my dd and do not think it is the end of the world, however smacking isn't the solution. I remember seeing a neigbhour severely smack her child for something trivial and thinking what do you do then if they do something serious.

Your Tarquin example is the same problem but the reverse side of it, by their actions both types of parents are not showing children that some things are a bit naughty while other things are totally unacceptable. There are no grades in discipline or lack of discipline, everything is either a slap or shrug.

redexpat Thu 25-Jun-15 06:22:54

I worked in a prison. Most of the inmates had been smacked until they were black and blue by their parents. Also given drugs at a young age, not sent to school, not fed properly, not taken to the drs, not taught to care for themselves...

siblingrevelryagain Thu 25-Jun-15 06:31:40

I am always struck (pardon the pun) by the irony of parents who whack their children in response to physical misdemeanours! Like it's ok for grown ups but not kids.

Hitting a child is always more about the parents anger than a considered method of discipline. How many people (of those that hit), take time out to consider it and then smack? Say, an hour or two later? It's always done in the heat of the moment and is lazy parenting-other methods are clearly too difficult for the parent to administer (taking away electronics, sending to bed early, removing a planned day out etc).

Stealthpolarbear Thu 25-Jun-15 06:34:19

Oh the youth of today...much like the youth of yesterday.
Yes I'd walk around after dark and the youth of today - some are bad, most are good. Bit like always.

morage Thu 25-Jun-15 07:09:55

Of course there are many great young people. But as a child growing up in a very poor area, nobody was ever murdered in the street, The same area and they are now. Yes it is small numbers, but that level of extreme violence did not happen.

Morloth Thu 25-Jun-15 07:13:27

I quite like the youth of today.

The ones I encounter all seem pretty much OK.

DonkeyOaty Thu 25-Jun-15 07:52:44

Why only smack or wet lettucing and naught in between?

I did lots of block/parry with forearm or leg, lifting child out of a scene and so on; things like go home if behaviour at toddler group awful

No smacking or ineffectual bleating

cashewnutty Thu 25-Jun-15 07:55:51

You can smack child on the bottom or the hand. It isn't illegal.

If you beat them until they are bruised - assault.

A swift skelp to the bum - ok.

Next question?

Klayden Thu 25-Jun-15 08:32:18

I never tapped/swatted my puppy and he's still managed to learn to behave.

seagreengirl Thu 25-Jun-15 08:53:00

Why do people always think that hitting kids is the only punishment, it isn't you know. You get this all the time,'you stop hitting kids, they go feral'. It's rubbish.

We never hit, I won't soften it by calling it smacking, our children. If they were badly behaved they had appropriate punishment that fitted the crime. It's not hard to think of one. Loss of treats etc. They didn't grow up lawless, they're lovely.

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