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To expect him to take my safety seriously?

(43 Posts)
dodobedoop Mon 22-Jun-15 22:05:01

I was meeting a chap tonight for a first date. We have been chatting online for a while. We arranged where to meet, he doesn't drive.
Just as I was leaving this evening, he text me saying he would be looking out for my car. I said, ok, then we can walk in the pub together.
His response was, no, so I can get in it (the car)

I said that I has already said I wasn't comfortable being in the car with him on our first meet. He minimised this, saying he isn't a mad axe man!!

So, needless to say, we have not now met. But am I over thinking it, or WIBU to risk offending him by putting my safety first?

Wideopenspace Mon 22-Jun-15 22:06:46

Minimised it then didn't show, or did you cancel?

I think you were sensible to refuse to let him in the car - was he just making a silly joke?

blueistheonlycolourwefeel Mon 22-Jun-15 22:07:56

Very sensible, u would say!! You have no idea who or what he is!!

blueistheonlycolourwefeel Mon 22-Jun-15 22:08:15

I would say, not u!!

PenguinPoser Mon 22-Jun-15 22:08:48

YANBU. Can't be too careful!

dodobedoop Mon 22-Jun-15 22:10:02

No we cancelled. Or rather he said I had kind of killed it?!

He wasn't joking, and he tried to turn it around by saying that his safety was also important, how did he know I'm not a vindictive man hater who would make false allegations! I'm like WTAF?

MakeItRain Mon 22-Jun-15 22:10:31

No you're not over thinking it and YWBU. You told him how you felt and he showed no respect for your feelings. He isn't worth meeting or getting to know.

scarlets Mon 22-Jun-15 22:10:54

Definitely NU

MakeItRain Mon 22-Jun-15 22:11:06

Oops I mean YWNBU!

MsMcWoodle Mon 22-Jun-15 22:11:42

What a twat.

fearandloathinginambridge Mon 22-Jun-15 22:11:47

YANBU. Not at all. Your safety is more important.

AnyFucker Mon 22-Jun-15 22:11:49

bullet dodged

what a fucking nob

Wideopenspace Mon 22-Jun-15 22:12:02

Ah. In that case, good call!

WhereYouLeftIt Mon 22-Jun-15 22:12:23

You absolutely dodged a bullet there.

MakeItRain Mon 22-Jun-15 22:13:09

Oh and his added comments just make it even more obvious you needed to head for the hills! Lucky escape I think!

Earthbound Mon 22-Jun-15 22:14:50


He sounds like a twat.

wanttosqueezeyou Mon 22-Jun-15 22:15:26

What a creep. You did the right thing.

DancingDinosaur Mon 22-Jun-15 22:17:23

You did the right thing!

LineRunner Mon 22-Jun-15 22:17:33

He sounds utterly dreadful.

Good call to not meet him. Ever.

cozietoesie Mon 22-Jun-15 22:18:56

.... a vindictive man hater who would make false allegations.... ?

Oh Boy were you right to cancel.

gamerchick Mon 22-Jun-15 22:19:36

Man you had an escape from that.


paulapompom Mon 22-Jun-15 22:19:47

Yeah cos mad axemen are always honest and tell people if they are going to murder them!!!

He sounds awful and creepy, You were sensible - good call wine

itsmeitscathy Mon 22-Jun-15 22:24:28

wow, you did the right thing. it's like lesson number one of online dating! I can't believe he cancelled!

dodobedoop Mon 22-Jun-15 22:26:27

I know paulapompom, my thinking exactly!

Thanks all, glad it's not just me!

Onwards indeed gamerchick!!

Goldmandra Mon 22-Jun-15 22:28:21

I imagine he cancelled because what he planned for your date needed to happen in the privacy of your car, not at a table in the pub.

Lucky escape I think!

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