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To feel sad about writing in Fathers day card

(70 Posts)
whatisforteamum Sat 20-Jun-15 19:24:17

I have a lovely card and the words say it all.Mentally ive had a few "lasts" with Mum and Dad having advanced cancer now this will be my Dads last Fathers day for sure.I have to work the whole day due to staff shortages until about 11pm.
I just feel reluctant to write in his card and he doesnt want to see my sister or anyone sunday(he knows its his last too).My heart goes out to others who have lost their lovely fathers flowers

LindyHemming Sat 20-Jun-15 19:27:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fishfingersfortea Sat 20-Jun-15 19:27:48

OP how kind you are to think of others whilst knowing how sad tomorrow will be for your family.
As hard as it is, if your dad doesn't want to see you or your sister, perhaps having to work will help in a small way.

firefly78 Sat 20-Jun-15 19:29:17

i had a little tear earlier thinking about my father in law. been 2 years now. im very lucky to still have my dad. flowers

resipsa Sat 20-Jun-15 19:34:48

I bought a card yesterday for my daughter to give to my husband but it was with a heavy heart as my lovely Dad died on 10 June several years ago; it was agony in that year to see/read about Father's Day the very next week.

resipsa Sat 20-Jun-15 19:35:45

So, no, not unreasonable at all.

Finola1step Sat 20-Jun-15 19:37:41

Tomorrow will be my 3rd Fathers Day without Dad. As I have young children, tomorrow will be about helping them do nice things for DH. It helps to soften the day a bit iyswim.

whatisforteamum Sat 20-Jun-15 19:38:22

Race for life is a great idea Euphemia i hope you and dd enjoy the day my sis did it for mum a few times and what with Mum getting donations to cancer research for her 70th raised £2500 between them.I just cant imagine sticking down the envelope eventhough ive mostly come to terms with his funeral plans and that he nearing the end of his battle sad

ajandjjmum Sat 20-Jun-15 19:42:17

So sorry whatisfortea.

I haven't bought a Father's Day card for the DC nor DH to give since I lost my Dad 12 years ago. Christmas cards to just 'Mum' are hard enough.

Thinking of everyone missing someone they love.

LindyHemming Sat 20-Jun-15 19:45:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LavenderRain Sat 20-Jun-15 19:46:03


whatisforteamum Sat 20-Jun-15 19:46:45

I meant to say my dear Dad is still here with aggressive cancer spread to his bones and bladder.Positive enough but with a heartbreaking under current especially on these special days x

Onedayinthesun Sat 20-Jun-15 19:52:38

YANBU �� Good Fathers are precious, OP my heart goes out to you. I will miss my dad for the rest of my life, Father's Day is always hard.

whatisforteamum Sat 20-Jun-15 19:56:31

he has fostered many dcs and adopted 2 been a great role model.He is 73

RachieS1986 Sat 20-Jun-15 20:01:27

He sounds like a wonderful man op.

HTH flowers

penguinsaresmall Sat 20-Jun-15 20:02:11

flowers to all who will find tomorrow difficult, for whatever reason.

I lost my dad suddenly as a child, so had precious few Fathers Days. I always make a big deal of it with the DC for DH - he's a lovely dad and he deserves it, and I'm so happy that the DC have him. It also reminds me of what I lost though sad

Tangerineandturquoise Sat 20-Jun-15 20:02:44


Father's Day is a commercially grown day to celebrate all that father's do for us and show them how much they mean
But every visit you make- every time you make these last days weeks easier you are celebrating father's day- you are showing how much he means to you and how much you love him and are grateful.
It is horrible that you have to work tomorrow-but you I am sure are giving him very many fathers days.
I am so sorry that you are growing through this

steff13 Sat 20-Jun-15 20:03:35

My dad died when I was 21. Father's Day is always hard.

Tryingtokeepalidonit Sat 20-Jun-15 20:20:19

Really hard, my DF is still alive and well in his 80's, my lovely DC lost their father four years ago. Such a painful day in many ways.

one1two2three3 Sat 20-Jun-15 20:28:56

I lost my dad when I was 7 so never really had the chance to celebrate fathers day. Tommrow will be my husbands 1st, our DD is 3 months tommrow! I have had such fun choosing a card and a gift for him!

TorrAlexandra Sat 20-Jun-15 20:35:28

This is my first Father's Day without my Dad as he passed away in December after an 8 month struggle with prostate cancer. This time last year we didn't know how bad it was, so I didn't know it would be our last. DH and I are running the Macmillan 10k tomorrow to raise money in his memory. Seemed like the most fitting thing to do. My thoughts go out to you and your family OP. flowers

bigbluebus Sat 20-Jun-15 20:52:25

This is my 2nd Father's Day without a dad too. Last year I was able to visit his grave and put flowers on it, but this year I am not able to get over there. I guess I will just spend the day remembering him. The DCs have got cards/pressies for DH but DH will be out most of the day on a charity bike ride. I realise it is just a commercial event really but it is very 'in your face' everywhere you look.

peaz Sat 20-Jun-15 20:57:44

This will be my 15th Fathers Day without Dad, and I hate it. I've since had the DC so it is all about DH (and the DC, as they love the whole card making and breakfast in bed stuff) but it is all bittersweet for me.
However, DB died two months ago, and he has a very young DS so I really cannot be arsed with it all. The idea that my DN will have no idea who his dad is when he grows older breaks my heart.

crazykat Sat 20-Jun-15 21:09:44

I'm sorry you're going through this op. I still have my dad but lost my mum two years ago and ever since then I hate mothers day. The first one after she died I wanted to hide in bed as it was always a big deal for us but I have dcs who wanted to make it special for me.

I know it's hard that your dad doesn't want to see anyone tomorrow but it's what he wants. I'm sure you and your dsis have made many fathers days special for him.

thanks op.

Koalafications Sat 20-Jun-15 21:11:25

flowers to everyone who has lost their dad.

I'm sorry to hear your dad is so unwell, OP. flowers

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