We have a few busy weekends as we are in the middle of building work, which is pretty grim, so we had arranged to go away to see friends/family who have been kind enough to host us for the weekends.
DH's parents have just phoned up tonight and said that they are having a 70th party for FILs birthday the first weekend in July and would like us to come.
We have already arranged to be at my sister's that weekend (nowhere near PIL). It has been arranged since early May and she has stuff planned for the DC. We haven't stayed there for 18 months although her and I meet up for lunch.
DH's uncle (FIL brother) is ill (we don't know any diagnosis, so no idea of how ill) and we are not sure how long he will be around. We were there in April for a big family party. DH's family are normally not that fussed with us for various reasons. DS is 2.5 and they have seen him 3 times and we normally see them about once a year.
DH wants me to call my sister and rearrange, telling her it's his fathers 70th and that his uncle is ill. While I am sympathetic, I think they have to accept if they arrange a party with two weeks notice, they have to accept some people might not make it and we are committed elsewhere.
I have suggested he goes to PIL and me and the kids go to my sisters, but apparently PIL want us all there and DH won't compromise.
I think my sister would understand and possibly be ok with it, but she would be upset and hurt and I don't see that I should cancel on her at relatively short notice.
DH says I am being unfair as his uncle is ill and that trumps everything else. I do understand he is upset about his uncle, but I think me and the kids at least should go to my sisters, anything else is at best horrendous manners. We could go to PIL two weeks later and perhaps take them and uncle out to dinner. DH thinks I should move the visit to DSis to that weekend (no idea if she is free).
i don't see how we are going to reach an agreement on this.
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AIBU?
To think DH is being completely unfair playing family top trumps
93 replies
Lambzig · 19/06/2015 21:32
OP posts:
Itsmine ·
19/06/2015 21:44
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vvega ·
19/06/2015 21:57
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