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To ask if you will be happy in the future to be referred to as an old dear or an old bag?

(79 Posts)
GeorgianaDevonshire Fri 19-Jun-15 13:12:58

Or an old trout, a woman of a certain age, an old hag?

If you won't be happy with such a description then don't use it now and don't tolerate other people saying it either.

It occurs a lot on Mumsnet, it's nasty and we should report it and MNHQ delete.

EponasWildDaughter Fri 19-Jun-15 13:15:25

YANBU, casual agism slips into our language with ease.

FarFromAnyRoad Fri 19-Jun-15 13:16:01

I don't know. I certainly don't like it and actively try to challenge it but on the other hand I find 'old gimmer' quite funny, especially when applied to me, so I suppose that makes me some kind of conflicted hypocrite! grin

LazyLouLou Fri 19-Jun-15 13:17:28

Ach. I shall be deaf as a post, so shan't hear it in real life. And my MN age is about half my RL age (and will never increase by so much as 1 day). So reading it will never apply to me either!

There's much more happening in the world to be up in arms over.

ApocalypseThen Fri 19-Jun-15 13:18:53

Quite right. The way people feel entitled to speak about women who've committed no crime but having lived a certain number of years really makes me angry.

That and the "old ladies smell of wee!" hilarity. Not uncommon for women who have birth injuries, we need to have more sympathy and respect.

QuiteLikely5 Fri 19-Jun-15 13:19:55

It depends who would be calling me by that name and the reason behind it.

If it was MiL then I'd be pissed off.

madcapped Fri 19-Jun-15 13:20:10

It goes two ways though. There was horrible agism (and racism and abilism) on that grumpy old person thread and anyone who dared call the posters out on their language where called humourless and chased off the threads.

NomiMalone Fri 19-Jun-15 13:21:37

I'll have no problem being called old. It's a statement of fact not a judgement.

Hag and Trout are not nice. I can't get my kickers in a twist about Dear.

paulapompom Fri 19-Jun-15 13:21:48

I was called an old biddy once in work (school ) I didn't like it. I was 44 at the time! It is ageist I guess, to define people in this way, but do you think it depends on the context, i.e. " she's a lovely old dear". Although that sounds patronising confused
<sits on fence>

Preminstreltension Fri 19-Jun-15 13:25:43

Completely agree OP. We are all that old dear/old bag one day, God-willing. And we will still think we are significant and relevant and will be shocked to think the world just viewed us as generic old, not very important people.

GeorgianaDevonshire Fri 19-Jun-15 13:27:19

Paula - I think "lovely woman" would suffice.

Charlesroi Fri 19-Jun-15 13:27:37

I'd prefer old bag
<buys more cats>

PoshPenny Fri 19-Jun-15 13:27:47

I'm a fat old trout me grin

PennilynLott Fri 19-Jun-15 13:30:45

YANBU and it's easy to find it amusing when you don't think it really applies to you, might not be so funny in 40 years.

squoosh Fri 19-Jun-15 13:33:36

'Old' is used to patronise (old dear) or insult (old bag).

Call someone a bag, a trout, or a witch if you think they merit it but leave the 'old' part out.

drudgetrudy Fri 19-Jun-15 13:33:37

It stops being funny when it starts to be used to dismiss everything you say-as most of you will discover eventually.

LaurieFairyCake Fri 19-Jun-15 13:35:02

I call my MIL 'old bag' and she signs that in her emails to me

She calls me 'slightly younger bag' grin

morage Fri 19-Jun-15 13:37:58

YABU. This kind of ageism is very common on mumsnet. I didn't realise how some younger people must view to me, until I came on here.

Seriouslyffs Fri 19-Jun-15 13:40:27

I aspire to be a game old bird.

Unreasonableandpetty Fri 19-Jun-15 13:41:14

Laurie my mum calls me a young bag too. As she is the old bag.
I call myself a miserable old bag when the dc as whyyyyyy when I say no to something. In a because I am a... Way. And I can be sometimes.
I don't refer to other people (apart from my mum) like that but can't say it would bother me if someone described me as it because well I may just be.

drudgetrudy Fri 19-Jun-15 13:42:16

I sign myself MIL on e-mails to my SIL-accompanied by my special evil grin logo grin

StockingFullOfCoal Fri 19-Jun-15 13:43:53

Anyone over 50 appears old to be classed as old on MN. I've seen it
on numerous threads this week.

I'm 28. My Dad is 54. I definitely wouldn't class him as old. He's fitter than me by a bloody long shot for a start. My Grandma is 70 and I only see her as "old" since her mother died aged 98 last year.

drudgetrudy Fri 19-Jun-15 13:44:40

It does however stop being a joke when people use age to stereotype "cushy, baby-boomer, Tory-voting, interfering old bat" (NOT)

SaucyJack Fri 19-Jun-15 13:45:05

I'm too busy looking forward to getting away with insulting people in supermarkets to care about what I get called in response.

RainbowFlutterby Fri 19-Jun-15 13:45:57

I'm terrified to open my mouth and refer to anybody as anything these days, other than their name.

When did we all become so offended by so many things?

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