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For mismatched sets to drive me crazy

(24 Posts)
mrsm43s Thu 18-Jun-15 17:09:15

This makes me seethe.

My DH can't keep sets together. So he will change bath towel, but not the matching hand towel or bath mat, leaving us with a mismatched set on display. It then needs to be "fixed", or otherwise we live permanently with mismatched sets, with all the component parts needing to be washed at different times.

He changes the bedding and puts our cream pillowcases from our spare set, with DS's white sheet on DD's bed (with her own duvet set and top pillowcase). So today I washed DS's bedding and can't find his spare sheet anywhere, just his under pillowcase - because its on her bed! And tomorrow when I change our bedding bits of our set are missing as on DD's bed. It drives me so utterly bonkers. Why? Just why? Is it really that hard to keep bed sets together? DDs sheets are pink, always have been, so why use cream or white, or in fact the random mix of both that he chose?

And don't get me started about him putting my clothes in DDs wardrobe and visa versa. How can he not tell the difference between clothes that fit a plump adult and those that fit a small child? Yes, we both have leggings or pink socks or patterned t-shirts, but surely a simple, cursory glance would show the adult clothes from the child clothes? And if in doubt, just look at the size label! I've never once mixed up DH's and DS's clothes, its really not hard.

I know none of this stuff is important in itself, but it's CONSTANT. I can't trust him to do a job properly. He's an intelligent man. And he's not trying to shirk responsibility as he willingly helps out loads. (And it doesn't get him anywhere as I don't fix it for him, I just whinge and send him back to do it again). So why can't he do stuff in a sensible, logical way?

AIBU to let this drive me so mad? Should I be able to overlook the mismatched sets? Maybe I should just get one colour of sheets, but he's even been known to fold a double in half and use it on a single bed, rather than looking for the right one.

He's a very mild man, my husband. Maybe this is a deliberate act of quiet rebellion designed to drive me crazy?

SunbathingCat Thu 18-Jun-15 17:16:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Monstersinthegarden Thu 18-Jun-15 17:17:11

I agree with you about bed sheets, why would you mix them up? But we just have one set for each bed, they get washed then put straight back on.

It seems weird to me to have to switch out matching towel sets though. None of my towels match each other. I would either have them all matching each other or have several of the type that gets washed more frequently.

purplewoofer Thu 18-Jun-15 17:18:43

I would be glad he changed the sheets/towels and put away clothes. Don't think DH has ever done any of that!

cogitosum Thu 18-Jun-15 17:19:34

I hate things matching. I deliberately mismatch bedding.

ShadowFire Thu 18-Jun-15 17:29:49

The thing with the clothes would bother me.

But I don't really care about towels or bedding matching as long as it's all clean and the right size for the beds.

silverglitterpisser Thu 18-Jun-15 20:34:23

Yanbu. How bloody irritating. Just reading this thread is increasing my blood pressure. Things r bought as a set or to make a set, keep them that way!!!

Mistigri Thu 18-Jun-15 20:53:50

If you don't like the way your DH makes the beds the simple answer is to make them yourself. I don't think you can impose your own housekeeping standards on other adults in your household (beyond expecting them to help keep the house and its occupants reasonably clean and tidy).

cashewnutty Thu 18-Jun-15 21:18:40

I learned on here the tip for keeping bedding together. Fold all the matching items into one of the pillowcases then when you need a fresh set the sheet, cover and pillowcases are all together. If you did this your DH would never be able to mismatch bedding. Can't help you with the towels or clothes though.

WizardOfToss Thu 18-Jun-15 21:23:45

Yep, it would irritate me too. But I know it doesn't matter really. And your DH just doesn't care. And probably never will! It's quite hard to argue with this viewpoint, but you could try, 'it's important to me because <insert non-bonkers sounding reason>, and when you don't do it properly it feels disrespectful to me'.

Let me know if that works! smile

Tinklewinkle Thu 18-Jun-15 21:32:43


I could have written your OP myself. My DH is the same. It drives me insane. I keep all the bedding sets folded together in the airing cupboard, but he still manages to put the plain pillow cases on with the striped duvet coverand vice versa. He changed DD2's bed a little while ago and put a double duvet cover on her single duvet. He thought it was perfectly fine and couldn't understand why I changed it.

He baffles me with the clothes. OK, I can understand him getting mine and 13 year old DD1's clothes mixed up sometimes (although he knows full well I hate leggings but still gives me DD's), but he does it with my 9 year old's clothes too confused. I keep finding my white work shirts in DD2's wardrobe as he thinks it's one of her school shirts - a) she has worn polo shirts to school for the past 6 years, and b) she's 9!

StarlingMurmuration Thu 18-Jun-15 21:37:16

My DP has never ever done that with our bedding. Because he's never changed our bed of his own volition. I do it myself because he'd never find put the right set on, let alone locate and arrange the appropriate matching throws and cushions!

ScrambledEggAndToast Thu 18-Jun-15 21:40:14

I just can't bring myself to care about things like this grin

canyou Thu 18-Jun-15 21:43:56

I wash each set, then fold the sheet pillow case and duvet cover into the second pillow case, then keep them in a wicker basket in the relevant bedrooms in the wardrobe.
re towels bath math etc as each set is washed I peg them together do a towel cannot be removed without the rest of the set, It helps keep me somewhat sanegrin

keeptothewhiteline Thu 18-Jun-15 21:54:46

I make life simpler than all that.
All my pillow cases and sheets are plain white. I use coloured and pattered duvet covers that all match with plain white.
All my towels compliment each other, in shades of lavender and sea grass green ( same as my bathroom colour. Any towel placed with any other will be a match, so no having to look out matching sets.
Impossible to go wrong.

BackforGood Thu 18-Jun-15 22:08:39

There is bigger stuff to worry about in my life.
A towel is there to dry yourself on - it doesn't matter if it's a different colour or pattern from another one in the bathroom hmm
What a waste of time (+ hot water etc) to wash a towel that might not need changing.
If it bothers you so much, you have 2 options - do it all yourself, or,, buy all matching coloured towels or sheets or whatever, and then it will 'look' right for you, whichever set it comes from.

toomuchtooold Thu 18-Jun-15 22:15:29

If we had sets of anything that would irritate buggery out of me. Luckily all our towels and bedding are ancient and mismatched so it doesn't matter. DH does put my socks in the kids' big box of socks though and that is annoying. OK, I get it, my socks have clouds and oranges on them, but they're about twice the length of DD's.

saoirse31 Fri 19-Jun-15 00:07:07

agree with tmto. .. matching sets r not nice. well imho obv...

toomuchtooold Fri 19-Jun-15 15:22:58

Ah no I meant if I had a matched set it would irritate me not to see it being used matched! Which is why we cunningly don't have matching sets, that's totally the reason, not at all because basically all our bedding and towels are still what we both left home with as students plus what the kids sometimes take a fancy to in Ikea grin

Theycallmemellowjello Fri 19-Jun-15 15:41:14

Yabu. If you're that bothered do it yourself.

SistersofPercy Fri 19-Jun-15 15:51:33

YANBU and this will out me as totally odd. Our local pub has mismatched seats. It drives me bonkers. The upholstery on the chairs is in about 4 different designs but they don't put the same designs around the same table.

I'm trying to eat my meal whilst trying to spot matching chairs and desperately resisting the urge to make everyone stand up and swap until they are all the same.

Hellolemonade Fri 19-Jun-15 15:52:22

Your husband actually changes sheets? Sorry. Couldn't read past that.

Runningupthathill82 Fri 19-Jun-15 15:54:53

YABU. This is bonkers IMO. Aren't matching sets all a bit Hyacinth Bucket? Especially towels - wow. What do you do if one towel needs washing but not the rest..wash them all?!

Life is too short to allow your blood pressure to be raised by something so inconsequential.

bonzo77 Fri 19-Jun-15 16:01:02

YANBU. It would irritate me too. I keep matching sets together, and spares in the room in which they are used. Towels: all ours are plain white, apart from the DCs' which again are kept in their rooms.

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