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AIBU to stay with a young child doing an activity?

(28 Posts)
HRMumness Fri 12-Jun-15 22:20:36

I took my (almost) 3 year old girl to her first dance class today. It's for 3-5 year olds and the class runs for an hour. People running the class seem friendly and have no complaints but after we arrived and did some admin, they led my daughter away to the class and said that parents were to wait outside the class.

AIBU to expect that parents would have the option of being able to watch and keep an eye on how a very young child is doing at an activity or is this the norm for certain activities?

meglet Fri 12-Jun-15 22:22:04

I get the impression it's quite common in dance classes.

schoolclosed Fri 12-Jun-15 22:22:50

I've only ever heard of this for dance, but I don't think it's uncommon in that field. I found a class which would let parents watch because I didn't like it. Then when she outgrew that class, I gently encouraged DD to do something else!

ImNotMeImSomeoneElse Fri 12-Jun-15 22:23:34


Ime of normal for the parents to stay outside for dance classes otherwise they get distracted. You are just outside if they need you.

hiddenhome Fri 12-Jun-15 22:24:06

Having a parent there might be distracting for them.

drspouse Fri 12-Jun-15 22:25:58

DS goes to 3-4yo ballet and this is the same.

Oddly at the same dance studio they have 2-4yo Music and Movement type thing and parents must participate in that. I'd rather go to that one but it clashes with something at the moment, and if I have to participate DD would probably cry but I may try and move to the other day when DD is old enough that I can pretend she's participating.

MrsNextDoor Fri 12-Jun-15 22:26:08

Yabu. Parents get in the way and get fussy and chat.

nancy75 Fri 12-Jun-15 22:26:12

I work for a sports coaching company, we encourage parents to go/ wait outside because the kids behave and listen better without the parents. We do usually let the patent sit in for the first class.

ButterflyUpSoHigh Fri 12-Jun-15 22:26:21

Normal for dance classes and gymnastics here too.

nancy75 Fri 12-Jun-15 22:27:47

Drspouse, the thing for 2 year olds will probably need parents to stay for insurance, we can't get insurance for under 3s unless parent is present.

kslatts Fri 12-Jun-15 22:30:59

My daughter went to dance classes for 12 years and now helps out with the younger children's class. The reason they say no parents is because generally the children become distracted easier with their parents in the room.

drspouse Fri 12-Jun-15 22:37:48

Interesting nancy, it is very much a class designed for parent to look like complete loons rather than sit on the side, I assumed it was a dance philosophy thing!

Supersoft Fri 12-Jun-15 23:24:47

Very normal for dance classes. Our local dance school takes kids from 12 months but they must be left.

arethereanyleftatall Fri 12-Jun-15 23:35:09

Normal. Swimming classes too, on their own from 3.

2rebecca Sat 13-Jun-15 00:25:28

As long as I was near by I was happy to leave them. At nursery or play group you leave them so I don't see the problem with activity classes. If they aren't happy you don't send them again for a while but mine were fine

Fatmomma99 Sat 13-Jun-15 00:29:48

Is it ballet? They tend to be VERY prissy about this.

BackforGood Sat 13-Jun-15 00:32:27

Very normal and very sensible. The dc respond so much better without parents sticking their oar in (this continues when dc are much older in some spectator sports).
If you don't trust the staff then wait until she is older and you might be ready to. You did start by saying that it's for 3-5 yr olds and you took your 2 yr old.....

DancingDinosaur Sat 13-Jun-15 00:37:24

Completely the norm. If its a dance class where they move through exams, then they need the children to concentrate, not be looking at mummy. My dd does the same, we get to go in twice a year to see what they've learnt. Which is fine.

PtolemysNeedle Sat 13-Jun-15 00:41:39

It's fine for them to not have parents watching, you just have to decide whether your child is ready for a class like that or not.

HRMumness Sat 13-Jun-15 05:45:53

She is 3 next month and I did check with the teacher before enrolling her that this would be ok. She also has been at home with me full time, I've left her with family and friends before plus the odd babysitter but she hasn't attended nursery etc.

Obviously this is the done thing with dance which is fair enough. I grew up in Australia and it was different as far as I can remember for my gymnastics.

Mehitabel6 Sat 13-Jun-15 05:52:31

Very sensible I think- much better not to have parents in the way.

diggerdigsdogs Sat 13-Jun-15 06:09:40

HRM I'm in Aus - perth and sydney. DD was left in Ballet from 3. Gymnastics tend to be left slightly later (4 or 5 IIRC) because parents are expected to help. They don't need to help in Ballet/dance/movement.

Same for football. Left from 3ish.
Music is left from 4.
Karate is left from 4.
Tennis is left from 4.

We don't do ALL of these things but having moved cities twice in 3 years I've investigated it a lot.

Oh and I used to take DD to a ballet class where parents joined in from 2 - 3 and then kids went solo at 3. DD behaved FAR worse when I was there.

hels71 Sat 13-Jun-15 07:15:34

Dd started ballet at 3. They let parents stay for the first class if they wanted then not after that. We get to watch a class twice or three times a year to see what they have been doing. Same when she started tap and modern.

drspouse Sat 13-Jun-15 09:35:13

Swimming we don't go in the water at 3 but all the parents watch (or take a younger sibling in for their own swim at the other side of the same pool)

Silvercatowner Sat 13-Jun-15 09:38:14

Reminds me of "Friends" - you don't watch a dance class "you DANCE a dance class". Dance - particularly ballet - is very disciplined and parents can get in the way or be a distraction.

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