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AIBU to think this is unfair to dd.

(54 Posts)
Fizzielove Thu 11-Jun-15 12:33:43

Ok so this Friday all the children are going to y1 for a brief settling in session. The nursery teachers will take them over to the main building. Afterwards children are to be collected by an adult and then taken to the zoo for the end of year treat. Sounds great! Only problem is they are insisting on a parent / adult for every child. I am disabled with mobility issues and am physically unable to take DMD. I have no other family able to take her along and the teachers are refusing to take her as their charge ( there are 3 teachers)! AIBU to think this is unfair and OTT to need an adult per child?

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Thu 11-Jun-15 12:42:27

You're right it is unfair and discriminatory as well. They are stopping your daughter from. I've never heard the likes before every child had to have an adult with them. I mean I get ratios but surely they don't need that many adults.
Hopefully someone a bit wiser than me though will be along with practical advise.

balletgirlmum Thu 11-Jun-15 12:47:42

ThAts very unfair.

It's something I would have been able to do as dh & I both work in jobs where we are unable to take time off in term time (dh is a teacher)

It's complete discrimination.

LisaD1 Thu 11-Jun-15 12:48:26

When did you hear about this?

I would contact the nursery manager and remind them of OFSTED's inclusion policy.....

DancingDinosaur Thu 11-Jun-15 12:49:13

That is disgusting. I would complain about it. How unfair that they should do that.

Allswellhere Thu 11-Jun-15 12:51:01

I've never heard of this before - at my children's school if parents do go along to trips (which they don't have to) they are not now counted in as the adult to child ratio - they have to be staff to be counted in. They are just classed as extras. This seems really out of order to me. Ask the school what they would do if they had twins or triplets? Would they each need an adult? I would put something in writing to the head if you're not getting any joy in talking to them - then take it upwards from there if you don't get a positive response. This is so unfair.

Charlie97 Thu 11-Jun-15 12:53:01

I am hoping that along the way somehow there is s misunderstanding. If not that is awful, poor little DD.

BeenWondering Thu 11-Jun-15 12:55:19

I'd complain. That sounds awful. I wish I could take her for you.
Yes to contact whoever is organising and explain your position. Talk to the teachers, write to the head. There really is no need for a one-adult one-child ratio. Absolutely ridiculous.

SocksRock Thu 11-Jun-15 13:06:55

Even on preschool trips, we had a ratio of 1:2, and some of them were only 2! And we went on public transport. I've just been on a school trip as a parent helper - we took 45 children from years R,1 and 2. I had my own two children to look after plus 3 others. 1:1 sounds very unusual

I would double check the position with the nursery manager. If its correct I would ask them to put in writing that DD can't attend due to her Mother's disability. See how they react.

AnImpalaCalledBABY Thu 11-Jun-15 13:42:01

So is the trip outside of normal school hours?

I can see where the school are coming from actually, if it's outside of school time then it's more like a school disco or summer fair where it's available but parents bring their own children along rather than a trip where the staff are responsible for the children

It would be nice if one of the teachers offered to take your dd but I suppose they are under no obligation to

It does suck for you and your dd, I'm severely disabled and my children often miss out of after school activities because I can't take them so I know how frustrating it is

ItsTricky Thu 11-Jun-15 13:53:32

That's crazy. How are they getting to the zoo? Is it more like an extra curricular thing than a school trip?

ninaaa Thu 11-Jun-15 13:54:12

Ratio does not need to be 1:1.

Could it be a child protection issue (other parents are not DBS checked therefore cannot take responsibility for children other than their own)? Doesn't explain why a staff member cannot take responsibility though.

There are many good reasons why parents may not be able to attend, I'm sure many work.

Soduthen116 Thu 11-Jun-15 13:57:03

Yes op if it's outside of normal school hours then it's not covered by Ofsted or regs I think. It's basically an outing that parents can take their kids to not an organised trip from nursery.

Surely though if this is the case one of the other mums couid take her as well as their own child.

They can't have it both ways can they?

MrsLeighHalfpenny Thu 11-Jun-15 13:58:46

I too think that that is very wrong and worth persuing with the nursery.

In the meantime though, in case they stick to their guns, could you find someone else to go with DD? How about her Dad, or another relative? Or the child of a friend who knows her well? I guess it could be anyone over 18?

manchestermummy Thu 11-Jun-15 14:07:57

That's silly.

DD1's nursery once imposed something similar for a trip that was taking place within nursery hours. One family had two children in the group going on the trip and were told that they'd need one adult per child. As if one of them couldn't supervise both of their children! I was on mat leave at the time and not unreasonably I wasn't allowed to bring baby dd2 on the coach. However, I also wasn't permitted to travel in my own vehicle and meet the rest of them there because I fell foul of the 1:1 ratio.

I ended up keeping dd1 off nursery that day!

TwinkieTwinkle Thu 11-Jun-15 14:12:25

Oh I don't like this! Trips like that shouldn't be organised. As the children aren't pupils of the school yet they probably don't have the right insurance to take them without their parents. Doesn't make it fair though.

TwinkieTwinkle Thu 11-Jun-15 14:22:37

Just realised it's the nursery teachers taking them. Again, insurance problems if it's out with their usual nursery time. Shitty thing to do really.

Fizzielove Thu 11-Jun-15 14:44:35

So I'm waiting for a call from the Principal......

I didn't think I was over reacting!!

I'll let you all know how the conversation goes and the outcome.

Thanks all.

OnionsAndApples Thu 11-Jun-15 14:49:13

Omg that is horrible! sad

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Thu 11-Jun-15 15:00:08

What about parents who work? DD had a settling session at her school today (her third). The first two she was required to be taken by a parent/carer, the third nursery took her as long as a parent collected. On every occasion there has been loads of children "missing" presumably as parents can't make it. It is unfortunate, but I cannot see any sensible way around the issue?

keeptothewhiteline Thu 11-Jun-15 15:03:46

Sounds like it is not an official school outing.

Perhaps it was even arranged by parents?

When ds3 was 2, his nursery took all the children to the zoo on the last session before Christmas - to see Father Christmas.

There was certainly no suggestion that parents needed to accompany the trip, nor did they have enough staff for 1-2-1 ratio with the children - as far as I recall, it was just staffed by the nursery staff, no parents at all - so it is perfectly possible and your nursery should buck their ideas up, imo!

Gobbolinothewitchscat Thu 11-Jun-15 15:08:36

Oh my goodness - this makes me feel very sad.

Putting the discrimination element aside, could the nursery ask one of their workers who is off that day to come in and assist. I think it's definitely right to mention the discrimination element. However, sometimes it can be quicker to resolve the actual issue with a practical suggestion to ensure that DD doesn't miss out and then take the discrimination point after to make sure it doesn't happen again

Ineedacleaningfairy Thu 11-Jun-15 15:19:22

I would imagine it's an insurance issue, it seems a bit daft to organise a zoo trip, surely a picnic in the park would suffice.

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