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To not allow my 8 yr old to go on his school trip tomorrow because he stole?

(49 Posts)
Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 19:52:24

He stole earlier this week €25 then the next day he stole again, €2.

JsOtherHalf Tue 09-Jun-15 19:56:18

Oh dear. What has he said about it?

Gatehouse77 Tue 09-Jun-15 19:58:03

If you feel it's a justified punishment and that he'll learn the right lesson from it, YANBU.

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:02:53

He said he doesn't care!

He's grounded at the moment, no treats, no playing on his x box, no treats on treat day at school but to be honest he doesn't give a shit.

His behaviour is grinding me down. i feel like a total bitch for doing it but my thinking is deal with it now rather than when I'm visiting him behind bars.

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:03:30

I should add that he had never stolen before, not a cent.

googoodolly Tue 09-Jun-15 20:04:44

You're not a bitch - sometimes kids need a shock to realise what they're doing is wrong. Could you make him earn the money back via chores or something as well? Or cancel pocket money until it's been earned back?

Penfold007 Tue 09-Jun-15 20:07:05

What's the school trip? If it is part of the curriculum then maybe he should go and the punishment should be at another painful time. If it's a school jolly ban away.

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:07:41

Goo- regardless of school trip I have told him he will pay it back. i did tell him he would work it off with chores.

Doesn't seem to be making a difference though and he is a PITA when he's doing them. Walks slow, gets distracted etc.

PtolemysNeedle Tue 09-Jun-15 20:07:43

If it's a trip to somewhere that is educational, YABU. Sometimes schools do work relating to the trip afterwards, and it wouldn't make sense to stop him from doing that. But if it's a fun trip to the beach or a theme park or something, then YANBU to keep him home.

PurpleSwift Tue 09-Jun-15 20:07:53

Will it inconvenience the school? If not, then go ahead. But if it does YABU

AuditAngel Tue 09-Jun-15 20:08:26

Penfold has said exactly what I was going to say.

HairyMcMary Tue 09-Jun-15 20:08:46

So what has prompted this sudden onset of stealing and not caring what you take away from him?

I would want to get to the bottom of it before embarking on an ever escalating list of punishments.

Did you tell him when he stole that you would ban the trip?

or are you just adding things to the list of punishments as you go along?

Does he know when the punishment is done with?

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:09:04

Penfold- it's a school jolly. I actually have no choice do I?

I am crying a little cos I feel so bad.

JeanSeberg Tue 09-Jun-15 20:11:04

Where/who did he steal it from?

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:12:47

He knows when he will be no longer grounded yes.

I told him I would have to speak to school about the trip.

I left my marriage last year to the biggest cunt in the world but our home is happy now. I understand for him it's different. Dad has not seen kids since last Aug, doesn't contact them at all.

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:13:44

My brother owed me the €25 euro and left it on a sideboard and when I went to get it, it was gone and my son owned up.

SparkleInParis Tue 09-Jun-15 20:14:25

You say he's never stolen before. Will he talk to you about why he's done this? Perhaps if you knew what he spent it on it could help you understand what's going on with him.

ilikebaking Tue 09-Jun-15 20:15:10

No, he should not go.
As a year three teacher, age seven to eight, he should not go.
Stick to your guns.
He needs to realise.
If they have to do academic work relating to the trip, he will catch up and be able to see photos, talk to others etc.
Do not let him go and involve the school with stealing based learning etc.

grapejuicerocks Tue 09-Jun-15 20:17:00

It does seem as if it is a cry for attention. I'd talk to him about his feelings. Say that it can't go unpunished but you want to talk about why he felt the need to do it. Can you access help via the school. He needs counselling really.

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:17:13

He took the money and bought a football with I that I told him I couldn't afford.

This is the first time he has stolen.

Penfold007 Tue 09-Jun-15 20:17:25

OP I feel your pain, to steal money twice and show no remorse, it isn't good. He has admitted the theft and then gone and done it again, has he returned the money?

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:18:38

Ilikebaking-no academic work. Just school trip as an end of year treat to an amusement park.

Jakadaal Tue 09-Jun-15 20:18:47

It's a horrible feeling when this happens OP - sadly dd went through a spate of this. I made a list of chores equal to the amount she stole and made her tick them off one by one.
As for the school trip I think I would have let her go (not sure what school would do with her if left behind) but with limited spending money, if any, with the explanation that the money she stole from me would have been her spending money.
I have to say that in our case it wasn't a quick fix and it took a while to cease. Being a parent is horrible sometimes hmm

Noneedtoworryatall Tue 09-Jun-15 20:19:35

Pencils- not a cent returned, spent the lot.

The doing it again and no remorse is why I have to teach him a lesson.

PeterParkerSays Tue 09-Jun-15 20:21:15

Have you taken the football back to the shop? What did he spend the 2 euros on?

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