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to think the worst? (perhaps TMI)

(27 Posts)
cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 11:53:39

A while back my DM had constant periods - lasting m in one go. She went to see the Dr who referrred her to Gynae. They removed a growth from her uterus and suggested she have a coil fitted. She did and the bleeding continued. She queried this and was told it was normal with the coil. I cant remember what happened over the growth but due to the continouos bleeding she has been back and they have examined her, finding "speckles" on her cervix. The DR said to my mum she couldnt say then and there what it was and that she would need a further procedure to check.

Coupled with that my mum has had an awful cough for months and finally went to the Drs who gave her antibiotics quoting a chest infection but asked her to go for a chest xray too. The Dr called her at home a few days later saying that there was "something" on the xray in/around her lungs and he wanted her to go for a CT scan.

AIBU to be shit scared that it's something serious? I find it very hard when my Mum talks to me about it as I naively think if I dont hear it it's not happening. I then also feel shitty on my Mum who is also terrified too when I try and steer the conversation elsewhere. I know IABU there.

Anyone had similar experiences (hopefully positive)?

cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 11:53:51

3m^

123Jump Mon 08-Jun-15 12:02:23

cjt110, It is very hard when you are dealing with a 'maybe'. You automatically start to think of the worst case scenarios.
The GP is telling you that something doesn't look right.
I know it is so,so difficult. But you must try to be strong. Your DM may need to talk,you have to listen. You have to.
You can also tell her the truth, that you are afraid and find talking hard. Just be honest. But let her lead the way.
It is happening and whatever the outcome, you need to try to be there for her.
I'm a nurse, and on Fridays the results would be in from the Monday surgeries. We would be telling the patients good news or bad.
It was very hard. I cried a lot!! But that is ok. I also held them and their relatives, all doing our best to 'be there'. Often that just means actually being there, and letting them lead the way.
I really hope things are not serious, and your mum is better soon.
In most cases the worst doesn't happen.
I suggest you bring your mum some cake and have a cuppa together.

Soduthen116 Mon 08-Jun-15 12:04:06

Think jump has just said it all op.

Good luck to you and your mum. Unmumsnetty hug.

LavenderRain Mon 08-Jun-15 12:14:30

thanks
What a worrying time, all I can offer is that I had a growth removed from my cervix ( I had had heavy bleeding and bleeding between periods) and had a coil fitted at the same time, I continued to bleed for at least 6 months and I've been told I have 'cervical erosion' which also causes bleeding,

The worst thing about these tests etc is the waiting, once you and your mum know what's going on you can plan and support each other. Be there for your mum, if she wants to talk let her talk.
My dad had cancer and he used to come to my house shaking, with an appointment in his hand for a scan, he was terrified. We could never really talk before, but over this we have become very close and he tells me all his worries now. Sometimes it's hard to be strong but it's good to know they feel like they can talk to you, and you can support each other,
And don't forget, medicine is advancing all the time, it's amazing what can be done nowadays,
I wish you both well and hope your mum is ok,

cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 12:18:21

Lavendar my mum's situation sounds very similar to yours so here's hoping it's all well. When you say cervical erosion, did they say anything like it was speckles? I suppose one reassuring thing is it's at least 4-6 weeks between appointments which I may be naive but should it perhaps be something more serious it would have been sooner?

cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 14:09:08

bump

LavenderRain Mon 08-Jun-15 14:31:02

Noboby mentioned 'speckles' just erosion which is from what I understand, shedding of cells.
I had a 2 week appointment after first seeing the GP then had lump removal, colposcopy and coil fitted all the same day. The results from the lump took 2 weeks. How old is your mum? I was 47 at the time

cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 14:32:25

She turns 50 this year LavendarI would say she had the removal around Sept, coil fitted around maybe the jan? And this next procedure/s in May and July.

LavenderRain Mon 08-Jun-15 14:38:31

Like you say, things dont appear to be moving urgently so from that I would guess they arnt overly concerned.
with regards to the CT scan, thats just a case of wait and see im afraid. What they saw maybe infection or it may be worse. Like I said the worst bit is the waiting, once you know, whatever the result you will feel relief
thanks

cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 14:53:35

I hope so Lavendar! Thanks for your lovely, kind reassuring words x

BoyScout Mon 08-Jun-15 14:56:15

I have to say that if the appointment is 4-6 weeks, they're not thinking it's something awful. Aren't you supposed to see someone within 2 weeks if they suspect cancer?

cjt110 Mon 08-Jun-15 15:20:22

I'm not sure BoyScout but I should hope so! That was my thinking too.

LavenderRain Mon 08-Jun-15 15:48:44

Yes if they suspect cancer you get an appointment within 2 weeks

bumbleymummy Mon 08-Jun-15 16:18:36

Such a worrying time for you both. I can't add much to what has already been said but just wanted to say I'm thinking of you and your mum and I hope you get some news soon thanks

crazykat Mon 08-Jun-15 17:33:32

Appointments are usually very quick if cancer is suspected, I know it was for my mum and mil.

It's also a good sign that it's been so long since the growth was removed as it will have been tested to see if it was cancerous and your mum will have been told by now if it was.

I know it's scary when someone close to you is going through this, I was terrified when my mum had cancer and tried to be strong for her and my dad.

Easier said than done but try to stay positive and try not to think the worst until you know for sure. As pp have said sit down with your mum and have a chat with her and tell her how you're feeling, yes it's your mum going through it but it also affects you. It's very difficult but try to listen to your mum when she needs to talk, hard as it is for you she obviously feels she needs to talk about it.

I hope it turns out to be nothing serious, there are all sorts of none life threatening things that can cause these symptoms. One thing you should definitely do is stay away from Google, it can be an amazing resource but not if you're waiting for test results as the most popular hits can be the worst case scenario.

cjt110 Tue 09-Jun-15 09:11:13

Thankyou everyone for your lovely kind words flowers

I spoke with my Mum - albeit by text - last night and told her that I was sorry if she thought I wasnt interested but that I am terrified in case it is something serious. She said that she understood as I often don't talk about things that are upsetting me and we had a good chat on the telephone.

She is off for her CT scan this morning and is being very positive - not sure if thats for my benefit or if she really is feeling positive - saying she just thinks the Drs are being over cautious.

Thanks once again for your lovely messages of support. It meant a lot. xx flowers

cjt110 Tue 09-Jun-15 10:31:34

update**

I have just had a message from my Mum following her CT scan that all is ok and that it is just protocol to see to people quickly.

I am so relieved!

Silverweed Tue 09-Jun-15 10:42:26

Great news! And lovely that you were able to talk to her too smile

bumbleymummy Tue 09-Jun-15 10:53:48

Great news! smile

SorchaN Tue 09-Jun-15 11:14:04

Ah, I was going to tell you my mother's story (with a happy ending) but I see your mother's had the all clear. Excellent news!

LavenderRain Tue 09-Jun-15 17:03:06

thanks brilliant news! what a relief,

cjt110 Wed 10-Jun-15 09:43:19

On speaking with my mum last night, she wasn't given the all clear as such but was reassured by the lady doing the CT that they get lots of these types of scans following an xray and most turn out to be an infection, a blur on the xray etc. So although it's not an answer, it is definitely more positive.

Thanks again for all your lovely replies flowers

cjt110 Fri 12-Jun-15 13:41:08

My Mum just called, her Dr called her and said that everything on her scan was clear. The bit he wanted to check was a small pocket in her lung which isn’t getting air but he said that’s probably due to her chest ibfection. SO relieved!

bumbleymummy Fri 12-Jun-15 16:28:39

That's great Cjt110! Glad you can both relax now. Have a lovely weekend thanks

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