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To be jealous of girls around my age falling pregnant again

(16 Posts)
Sugarness67 Mon 01-Jun-15 17:34:42

Hi everyone,

Every time I see a girl around my age (+22), or someone who I knew becoming pregnant again, I get jealous and I don't know why!

Ok, I had DD very young. I was 16 when I had her and realising how hard it is emotionally and financially to bring up a child, I vowed to stay in education, get a decent job and then have more children. So I stayed in education, I graduated from University last year and I'm doing my masters this September coming.

Though, my friends or people I knew, who got pregnant around my age are already onto their second or third child. I become quite jealous and they then ask me why I'm not pregnant yet and pressure me into having a second child. Don't get me wrong, I love children and I want DD to have another brother or sister. But the experience of having DD so young and what I went through does put me off a bit of having another child too soon. Though on the other hand, DD is six and I do not want there to be a be a big gap between her and her future sister and brother.

Am I just being silly?

Sugarness67 Mon 01-Jun-15 17:35:14

*were pregnant

Soduthen116 Mon 01-Jun-15 17:38:41

Of course not. Your feelings are your feelings.

Personally I see a pregnant woman and think poor cow and thank god that's not me.

Each to own.

BathshebaDarkstone Mon 01-Jun-15 17:41:38

You're broody. Big age gaps are okay, do what you feel is right. smile

CuppaSarah Mon 01-Jun-15 17:46:10

There's no right time. Imagine how hands on your dd will be when you have your next one. She'll be so.amazing your friends will be envious of the gap. You have potentially two decades of fertility so there is no rush. All that matters if what you want. Masters are only a year long aren't they? There must be worse things in the world than becoming pregnant in the last half of your masters surely wink

UmiSays Mon 01-Jun-15 17:46:19

I dont think youre being silly to have mixed feelings, but you made a good plan and youre sticking to it, youre still very young....keep going with your education and building your career. Plenty of time for more babies.

Sianilaa Mon 01-Jun-15 17:46:22

Wow! Good for you, you're inspirational smile what an amazing role model you are for your DD. It is hard to have kids young and still get through Uni, etc.

YANBU to feel broody, but equally, better to get your Masters first. And you are still so young, plenty of time for lots more babies!

LadyMaryofDownton Mon 01-Jun-15 17:46:37

You're doing the right thing, I speak from experience. I had my first at 18, worked really hard at my career got my degree & PhD then got married and had more kids. It's worked out well for me & it will for you too.

I've 9 years between my eldest & my middle one, it's great I've got a little helper & the balance is easier this time round.

Ineedtimeoff Mon 01-Jun-15 17:48:00

I know what it's like to watch all your friends have babies and circumstances mean that you can't have (another) one, YET. I was 36 before I had DD but new from a very young age that all I wanted was to be a mum. I got really quite depressed about it at one stage.

I think you need to accept your feelings of jealousy but remind yourself that you will have another child, just not quite yet. 22 is still very young.

Congratulations on your success in education. However, I would advise getting a few years of work under your belt before having another child. You don't want all that time studying going to waste!

formerbabe Mon 01-Jun-15 17:49:36

Having a third child by the age of 22 is hardly envy inducing...

NadiaWadia Mon 01-Jun-15 17:51:05

I would think that your friends that had their first child same time as you probably didn't get to university? By achieving your degree and going on to a Masters with a child in tow at such a young age you have done absolutely brilliantly. You are creating a better life for you and your DD, and any sibings you give her in the future. Well done you!

You are still very young, so plenty of time for future DCs. If your DD has a good social life, she will be fine, and I'm sure she will be a great big sister one day.

Sugarness67 Mon 01-Jun-15 18:01:01

Thanks everyone for the comments. The thought does get me depressed at times. Though, if I was to get pregnant now, I will be shitting myself! No Nadia none of my friends were able to progress onto their education.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Mon 01-Jun-15 18:07:13

I'm jealous of pregnant women full stop, to see a bfp announcement on here from a stranger is enough to bring out the green eyed monster

Cherryblossomsinspring Mon 01-Jun-15 18:16:19

Well you sound quite sensible and it's natural to be broody. What does your partner think? Would he be able to support your ongoing studies and your family? If yes then maybe it's something you can consider together.

Bishopston Mon 01-Jun-15 18:29:09

You sound very organised and disciplined! I'm impressed!

DixieNormas Mon 01-Jun-15 18:39:42

I had my 1st at 16, 2nd at 24. the big age gap was fine, I liked it so much that I didn't have ds3 for another 8 years!

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