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To wonder why men can't be in the steam room or sauna without making noise

(33 Posts)
chaletdays Thu 28-May-15 12:56:57

Seriously, if there's a couple of women in there the place is calm and quiet. As soon as a couple of men arrive there's grunting and groaning and slapping their arms and legs and loudly slurping water and even standing up to do exercises.
Can't they just shut up for a few minutes?

morelikeguidelines Thu 28-May-15 12:58:37

I prefer quiet in steam room or sauna too. The worst is when people speak to me directly, despite obviously signals that I want to be quiet.

AMaleOfGreatMaleness Thu 28-May-15 13:01:09

I have fairly similar feelings the other way, haha.

Avoid mixed stuff is my advice.

chaletdays Thu 28-May-15 14:08:10

Female only steam rooms sounds like a great idea. Unfortunately I've never seen any.

minouwasminou Thu 28-May-15 14:18:34

Gorillas in the Mist!

Heh heh!

minouwasminou Thu 28-May-15 14:29:40

Seriously, though, I think sometimes men do this when in the company/presence of women they don't know because it makes them feel less threatening. Like, "I'm definitely here for the health benefits rather than to look at you in your bikini, hear me inhale the steam and pound my thigh muscles."

If they're obviously concentrating on their own bodies, they don't feel so much like you might be worrying about their intentions. Sitting in silence can make them feel like some creepy stalker-type.

Aeroflotgirl Thu 28-May-15 14:37:51

rofl grin, the sauna is bringing outtheir Alpha maleness,

helenahandbag Thu 28-May-15 14:47:21

YANBU, though my mum and I made a complete spectacle of ourselves in the steam room at a spa last year. Every time she moved, her swimming costume made a loud farting noise against the wet tiles and we were both crying with laughter and receiving daggers from the women in with us, which just made it worse. Then another woman came in and made a massive fart sound as she sat down so we had to leave before one of us cracked a rib. The silence makes me nervous! grin

EponasWildDaughter Thu 28-May-15 15:10:14

helena you've reminded me of a long forgotten episode when an old best friend and i decided to try the sauna in the gym. Would normally just do some lengths of the pool and go. We were both apprehensive about going in the sauna, as neither of us had been in before and were unsure of the actual benefit, but thought - yeah, lets try it.

We slipped in to join the regular sauna goers. Sat there in the silence and the steam opposite each other in our cozies (yes, the squeeking bum thing). We watched each other getting hotter and hotter with sweat pouring down our beetroot coloured faces and ... my GOD the giggles descended upon the pair of us in a way i hadn't experienced since i was about 14! Every time we caught each others eye the pair of us would nearly explode trying not to laugh and we'd have to stare in the opposite direction with our cheeks doing a dance blush It was awful and ridiculous.

We quietly left the sauna, and did not go back.

helenahandbag Thu 28-May-15 15:54:19

Eponas I'm taking comfort in this, I'm glad other people become a bit hysterical in the silence of the sauna! My mum and I are fairly sensible adults but we both had tears streaming down our faces blushgrin

chaletdays Thu 28-May-15 16:10:23

I see what you're saying minou, but to be honest I find a man grunting and puffing or doing exercises in front of me in his speedos a lot more off putting than a man just sitting there in silence. grin

HelpMeNotSnap Thu 28-May-15 16:27:14

The men in my old one used to shave then do a flick motion to get the crap off their razor. Dirty bastards. Was so tempted to start doing my bikini line.

Seriouslyffs Thu 28-May-15 16:34:46

"I'm definitely here for the health benefits rather than to look at you in your bikini, hear me inhale the steam and pound my thigh muscles."


Rainbunny Thu 28-May-15 20:56:41

I stopped using the sauna in my gym for this reason. Whenever there is a man in there it seems like they HAVE to start talking, it's the women who are quietly sitting. From this anecdotal experience it seems like a lot of men cannot handle sitting in silence. It's such BS that women are supposed to be the talkative sex! That said, I have been to a Russian Banya and it was blissfully quiet and relaxing, so it's probably just the men who go to my gym who can't shut up.

Sunsoo Thu 28-May-15 21:58:52

Oh wow! The sexism here is disgusting!

Can you imagine if this thread was reversed? Or about race rather than gender?

MamaLazarou Thu 28-May-15 22:08:56

Shaving in the steam room is just unforgiveable. Report them!

AyMamita Thu 28-May-15 22:11:53

YANBU. See also: men who can't exercise in a gym without grunting, huffing and puffing like they're trying to push over St Paul's Cathedral. SHUT UP.

Bodicea Thu 28-May-15 22:16:17

That's a bit over the top sunsoo. It is just light hearted observation! Can differences between sexes not ever be discussed because of fear of being sexist?

intlmanofmystery Thu 28-May-15 22:26:40

I do see the opposite - at my gym its the women who feel the need to talk constantly and loudly in a small (hot) wooden box whereas the men tend to sit quietly or just leave

whois Thu 28-May-15 22:28:07

Oh god my dad does this - goes into the steam room to do his exercises after a big session in the gym. Totally not appropriate!

Shockers Thu 28-May-15 22:40:57

I have noticed this too. My first time in a steam filled room with a grunting man filled me with fear. Now I just accept it, although I have left when it sounds too much like masturbation.
(and I'm a member at a nice place!)

Sunsoo Thu 28-May-15 22:49:10


Light-hearted? Okay, I dare you to go into the feminism boards and post this thread, role-reversed...

Shockers Thu 28-May-15 23:05:52

But it wouldn't work role-reversed... in my experience, women don't grunt in steam rooms, but men often do.

Not all of them obviously... but enough for it to be noticed and commented on. I've noticed that men are more inclined to grunt when the stream room is almost empty, rather than full. If I am the only other person in there, I don't feel comfortable. This is why I know it is a frequent thing.

balletnotlacrosse Fri 29-May-15 13:41:21

I hate it too. The steam room is supposed to be a relaxing place. At my gym it is often full of men who can't stop talking and using expletives for every second word. When they're not talking they're heaving big sighs and grunting or pacing around in their flip flops and speedos. Ugh!
Really annoying.

balletnotlacrosse Fri 29-May-15 13:45:48

Oh and is using the ladder to enter the pool not considered macho? It's always men who insist on jumping in and splashing everyone within a ten yard radius.

Sorry Sunsoo, but it is.

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