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AIBU?

Urgent - too ill for directions hearing - what do I do?

20 replies

AlmondAmy · 17/05/2015 22:16

Our first directions hearing for my exH to have contact with our DD is tomorrow at 10. She has a virus/D&V, as does my toddler and baby. DP was going to come to court with toddler and baby as baby is breastfed but now DD will be off school and we have no other childcare. Court is over an hour awayand I've just started being sick, too.

Cafcass have recommended a full section 7 report and I'm opposed to interim contact. Has anyone been in the position of being too ill to attend the directions hearing? Will they adjourn it? I don't want him to be granted contact until the welfare issues are resolved but dragging the three kids all the way there seems unfair, particularly on DD who'll be anxious to be in the same building as him.

I know it's not really an aibu but any advice would be much appreciated.

OP posts:

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HeadDoctor · 17/05/2015 22:18

In your position I would express milk for the baby and leave DP at home with the children.

HeadDoctor · 17/05/2015 22:19

Sorry, missed that you're now being sick too. Do you have a solicitor?

26Point2Miles · 17/05/2015 22:21

Yes the children and your DP dont need to be there

PeachyPants · 17/05/2015 22:21

If it was me I would do what HeadDoctor suggests unless I really couldn't physically get there. I wouldn't want to be perceived as awkward or stalling. Hope you are feeling better soon.

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 17/05/2015 22:23

Stay at home, you are ill and need to rest.

ChuffinAda · 17/05/2015 22:24

Get a Dr's note, speak to your solicitor and expect a call from your barrister to ask for your views etc So they can state your case.

I had Emergency surgery the day before a family court hearing and they still wanted me to attend Until I produced a sick note.

AlmondAmy · 17/05/2015 22:27

I don't have a solicitor. Baby won't take a bottle.

OP posts:

Evabeaversprotege · 17/05/2015 22:28

I attend court weekly due to my job & you'll need to provide a sick note of you don't attend.

It may look like you're putting the hearing off.

Hope you get well soon.

ChuffinAda · 17/05/2015 22:28

So who is representing you and the children's interests then?

26Point2Miles · 17/05/2015 22:29

You need to be there or they could act in your absence

Evabeaversprotege · 17/05/2015 22:29

Feed the baby before you go, court won't take all day.

26Point2Miles · 17/05/2015 22:30

chuff self representation?

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 17/05/2015 22:32

I think going to your doctor is unreasonable unless it's medically required. I don't think a court would expect it unless you had a poor history of attending. I would hope that you might be able to participate over the phone. If you are represented by a solicitor/barrister then this is easier. If you are not, I would try and phone the court first thing, and then follow up with a fax/email. Expect that your ex will see what you write. Depending on how things are with him (I'm guessing not brilliant), I'd also consider a brief text/email to him to explain that you won't be there and why.

RandomMess · 17/05/2015 22:33

Get on the phone at 8am for an emergency GP apt for a sick note it would seem.

I really hope you're well enough to go. If need be take bf baby with you and leave everyone else at home.

ChuffinAda · 17/05/2015 22:33

You will need a sick note. You may have to pay for a private one though but you will need it.

ChuffinAda · 17/05/2015 22:34

26 ah yes

PourquoiTuGachesTaVie · 17/05/2015 22:35

Go to court, take everyone. Explain situation and apologise for puking...

If baby is bf and ill then he/she needs to be with you, especially if he/she won't take a bottle.

Evabeaversprotege · 17/05/2015 22:38

Honestly, this will have been arranged & put on the court list weeks ago.

You'll need to prove you wee too ill to attend. Is your dd meant to be at it too?

AlmondAmy · 17/05/2015 23:05

They won't allow baby in thr court room. With travel, traffic and needing to be there an hour before the hearing I'll be gone at least 5 hrs which is too long to leave baby unfed, particularly as she's ill and could dehydrate.

OP posts:

ChuffinAda · 17/05/2015 23:13

Then a trip to the Dr's to be signed off is your only option. You and the kids aren't well. You can't attend. You need a sick note.

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