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AIBU to think this wasn't a waste of A&E time?

(48 Posts)
LaLyra Sun 17-May-15 15:29:59

On Tuesday night I was getting something out of the boot of my car and managed to whack my head. I'm not entirely sure how I misjudged it so badly, but I really caught it. I was sick a few minutes later, but put that down to the fact I'd not long gobbled down a rushed, late dinner (DH is away, kids were all at different activities, baby is teething - one of those days).

An hour later my 15 year old phoned MIL because I'd been sick another 4 times and had vomited up the painkillers that I'd taken and they hadn't had any effect on the headache (which was on a par pain wise with a migraine, but without the flashing lights/aura sensation). She came round and took me to A&E. I was there until 2am, at one point they debated if I should go to the next hospital as they have no CT scan facilities overnight, but they decided to stick with observation as I had only been sick once more just after arrival. They said that I needed kept an eye on and offered a bed for the night (If I was sick again they'd have sent me to the other hospital, if not they'd have decided on a CT in the morning), but the doctor gave me the option of going home if MIL stayed over and kept a close eye on me and I promised to go straight back or to other hospital if I was sick again, if the headache worsened or anything on a sheet of things happened. I chose to go home because as well as DS15 I had 4 other children at home. DS and twin DDs (12) are perfectly capable of looking after the younger two, but I'd rather be at home.

I had an appointment the next morning where the docs repeated the tests of the night before then let me go home with some more rules. At the baby clinic on Thursday morning the practise nurse doing baby's vaccination was concerned I was developing a black eye (bump was on back of head) and sent me back to the hospital. I said it was bags and me looking shit because I was knackered, but hospital disagreed and I was sent off for a CT scan, which came back clear. I've been told i have concussion, I've been given tablets to shake of the nausea as it was impossible and I still have a lingering headache now, couldn't even contemplate driving yet and MIL stayed until yesterday because she could see that I wasn't right.

So AIBU to tell my brother, who works for the NHS, abhors misuse of it, and has commented four times (and counting) today about people wasting A&E time with 'minor bumps' to fuck right off?

Would anyone have not gone to A&E in that situation?

He's a bloody git because he knows he's one of the people who can really make me doubt myself. I've been polite so far, but he'll keep going on and on and on and on and on because that's what he does. I can't stay at the park with the kids all afternoon and my SIL (other brother's wife) has made dinner so even if I had the car I couldn't leave as it'd be unfair on her.

makeminea6x Sun 17-May-15 15:31:40

Clearly appropriate, don't worry. Accident, tick, resulting in an injury that needed assessment, tick.

Ignore your brother on this one.

CaptainAnkles Sun 17-May-15 15:32:09

I think you needed to be checked over if you whacked your head hard enough to make you sick several times, yes. He sounds like someone who enjoys needling away at people when he sees a weak spot.

TheCowThatLaughs Sun 17-May-15 15:33:05

He sounds like a dick! Hopefully not a nurse or doctor is he?!

PrincessShcherbatskaya Sun 17-May-15 15:33:16

YANBU - your situation is exactly what A & E is for. Glad you are feeling better. I think any HCP who knows what they're talking about would be very concerned about someone presenting as you did and would want to scan you. I'm concerned that he seems unconcerned to be honest!

Mintyy Sun 17-May-15 15:35:02

Well of course yanbu. Why are you even asking?

Are you with your brother? Why can't you talk to him about this?

girlgamergoesbad Sun 17-May-15 15:35:42

Well the first incident is definitely cause for concern, especially with the vomiting, I'd have done the same thing because you just never know with head injuries!
In terms of being made to have a scan because the nurse was concerned about black eye was in no way your fault - it was a bloody professional recommendation!
Thank goodness it did turn out to be a relatively minor bump but luckily for you, you were able to get tested very quickly to check it wasn't anything worse! Your brother seems to be taking the piss tbh :/
Hope you're feeling better btw flowers

chiruri Sun 17-May-15 15:36:02

I am an NHS HCP and have spent some time working in A&E. You were absolutely right to attend A&E with your injury! Head injuries can sometimes seem minor, but certain symptoms (vomiting being one of them) can be a sign of a more severe injury. Definitely tell your B to fuck off if he gives you any grief for this.

fairgame Sun 17-May-15 15:36:04

Of course YANBU. I used to be an A&E nurse and your visit was completely appropriate.
Maybe your DB needs more training.

Littleorangecat Sun 17-May-15 15:36:35

YANBU, Absolutely not wasting time either. A family member very recently had a bang to the head, didn't throw up, didn't have a head ache, but turned out to have a subdural haemorrhage a week later which was life threatening.

Aermingers Sun 17-May-15 15:36:54

Of course it wasn't inappropriate! Look at what happened to Natasha Richardson when she banged her head.

Daimgirl Sun 17-May-15 15:41:54

What does your brother do? Is he actually a HCP? If he isn't tell him to fuck off that trained professionals thought differently. If he is tell him to fuck off and re:educate himself on the risks of not getting head injury a checked out.

Am ex-Nurse, with that history I'd have called an ambulance.

Hope you feel better soon.

MagelanicClouds Sun 17-May-15 15:42:28

Head injury? Hard enough to leave you being sick?
I'd say your mil did the right thing. Luckily you hadn't done more damage to yourself but with a head injury bad enough to leave you vomiting then I think it's better to play it safe and get checked out.
I really hope your brother isn't a doctor but I do understand how sick they must get of time wasters. I wouldn't put your case in that category!

kickassangel Sun 17-May-15 15:44:08

Ask him why the hospital staff, on each of your visits, were concerned, and even sent you for a scan on the final visit? Perhaps NHS employees are the ones who are misusing/time wasting as that's your experience?

I hope he isn't in patient care. I can imagine a car accident victim being told to walk ti off.

LaLyra Sun 17-May-15 15:48:38

he's not a nurse or doctor thankfully. Somehat ironically he's a manager whose job is often described as pointless by a lot of people (I don't know the ins and outs of his job so I don't know if it is pointless).

He's just one of those people who can't see by their own opinon. And for some reason, the counselling I had over my parents said it was residual guilt because he got the brunt of it, it's really hard to stand up to him for me. He's 9 years older than me and had a very protective roll in my life. Several times he hauled me out of our father's reach. He's also the one who spoke out which meant we went to live with grandparents when I was little so I had a much better childhood than him.

He just thinks he'd have "waited to see" and therefore anyone who doesn't/didn't wait the length of time he would have is wrong. Unfortunately he's got more of our father's personality than he realises. Obviously he's not got the violent evilness, but he's got a knack of making it impossible to argue against.

Like a small child I've escaped to the swing park with the kids until our other brother is back from collecting my sister. His wife isn't here, she's the best person to make him wind his neck it. It's pathetic really, I'm an adult. I should be able to explain that I felt like shit and couldn't know that the scan was going to be clear. The hospital offered me to stay in ffs, they don't do that, they're not a hotel.

I'll give it 10 minutes and then head back. He's one of very few people in the world who seem able to make me lose all of my skills of defending myself. I generally try to avoid being myself with him for that reason.

Thank you though. It's good to know, even though I knew in my heart, that I wasn't wrong.

Penfold007 Sun 17-May-15 15:59:27

Your daughter did absolutely the right thing calling her GM. Taking you to A&E was the right thing to do. Just ignore your brother. Hope you soon feel better.

quietasamouse Sun 17-May-15 15:59:55

Oh god my brother's just the same! He makes his decision and that is it! I used to think such decisive, leadership skills were great. Now I see that he can be equally decisive but wrong! Ignore him.

TurnipCake Sun 17-May-15 16:02:54

I'm a doc and your A&E attendance was entirely appropriate. Hope you're feeling better, your brother sounds like another headache

Icimoi Sun 17-May-15 16:03:01

Point out to your brother that Natasha Richardson "waited to see". That went well, didn't it?

BlackeyedSusan Sun 17-May-15 16:05:41

ask him where he got his medical degree the twat maybe he should have a knock to the head to knock some sense into him as it were.

Welshmaenad Sun 17-May-15 16:06:25

Absutely appropriate use of A&E. I've had concussion (bucked off a horse) and it was ghastly. You sound like you fave yourself a proper thwack you poor thing. Ignore your brother.

Incidentally if you're still feeling sick, try drinking Indian tonic water. My great aunt made me have done when I couldn't stop retching after my bump, and I thought she was just being mad as per, but it worked. I think it's the quinine.

Daimgirl Sun 17-May-15 16:11:58

Ohhh he's one of them.

Smile nod(if it doesn't hurt) and ignore. Lots yeah, mm, if you think, shall we go get ice cream/ feed the ducks/ go on the slide.

No point arguing, ignore and change subject.

DarthVadersTailor Sun 17-May-15 16:21:53

Head injury, headache, nausea/vomiting, bruising on the back of the head.....all signs that require assessment at A&E.

dixiechick1975 Sun 17-May-15 16:23:38

Sounds like your ds at 15 has far more sense than him. I see mil not him came to your aid and helped for the next few days. Sounds like you have had a terrible time, take care of yourself not worry about him.

Justusemyname Sun 17-May-15 16:26:48

Let that be the last time your brother BULLIES you.

Go back and if he starts, kill him dead. Verbally.

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