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Why can't I find a nanny?!

(136 Posts)
BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:42:56

I've been looking for a nanny for four days a week (Wednesday's off) because I'm going back to uni. Every nanny we've spoken to we've stressed that I'm not sure what my schedule will be exactly so we're happy to agree to a daily rate now, so that if I end up home early everyday and let them go, they're not going to be out of pocket. We do have a dog but I'm putting him in doggy day care every nanny day so he won't be an issue for anyone and she won't have to take care of him. We've been really informally interviewing, and during the interview had agreed to 10ph and four weeks holiday, all bank holidays etc... So we really loved 2 of the nannies and invited them back to meet our 2 children and see how they got on. (Though I know this could go badly just because children are unpredictable!)

So, we loved Nanny 1. She was so sweet, my youngest child really took to her (nearly 2, and very clingy to me) and she agreed to the money.... I wanted to offer her the job on the spot, but we had already arranged to see nanny 2 the next day.

So Nanny 2 arrives (after me raving about her to DH about her 10 years experience and how easy it was to chat to her) and it was completely awkward. Then she started on her demands... She wants her 4 weeks holiday and all bank holidays, but also Easter holidays and mid December until January 3rd... Paid. We need someone 4 days a week with Wednesday's off, this was specified a lot and mentioned in our profile, on the phone and at her first interview. Well, she doesn't want that. She's decided she wants Fridays off because she just loves to take long weekends. And if she 'liked the family enough' she would agree to their schedule but she doesn't feel she can at the moment - oh dear! She won't use her own car (although her profile says she will), and needs to authorise the car we want her to use, as we may not have considered it's safety for children. She also wants to be paid 45p a mile for local driving even though we would have to cover all car expenses. She reminds us how great she is, and how wonderful a nanny she would be... A lot. She tells us she's going straight off to another interview so we need to hurry if we want her.

Well, um, we don't anymore!

So Nanny 1... she's very young, she only has 8 months experience and her spelling etc on her cv was awful! But she was so so sweet and lovely and we really wanted to give her a chance because she was just so likeable. She already agreed to 10ph and 4 weeks holiday plus bank holidays and Christmas week so we called and offered her the job...

She comes back to us saying she's changed her mind. She wants £14ph. Minimum.

Fuck.

We really like her so we write a long message saying that my oldest will be at school all day, My youngest will start nursery next year and the following year full time school, so as a long term job it will get easier and easier, the children loved you, we loved you but financially we just can't do £14... We can look to review it in 6 months but for now we can only do 12ph but we've got to look at some finances.

She comes back to us saying that actually, even 12 - 14 wouldn't be enough.

Back to the drawing board.

It must be me?! What are we doing wrong? Is this ridiculously cheap for a nanny? Is 4 days a week weird? Is the 2 meeting process odd?

LaurieFairyCake Tue 12-May-15 15:47:42

How odd.

How many hours a day are you agreeing to?

They both sound dreadful

RB68 Tue 12-May-15 15:49:01

No experience here but £10 ph is what a cleaner gets paid round here and we are not even home counties. The interview process doesn't sound unreasonable.

Don't even think of going for Miss demandypants

Have you looked at au pairs instead?

Its still early days

BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:49:28

10 hours, 8 - 6 but if my uni day finishes early, they can go! But I don't know what my timetable will be until September when I start. This is not going well!

Mostlyjustaluker Tue 12-May-15 15:49:37

Sorry I have no idea but as I read it I thought I should reply. There is a nanny/childcare board which maybe more helpful.

Theycallmemellowjello Tue 12-May-15 15:49:54

Where do you live? It does seem quite low to me but I'm in London.

BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:51:15

I did think about an au pair but they would have to look after my (will be) 2 year old all day and she's not been very easy to leave with anyone so I was hoping a qualified nanny would be used to dealing with separation anxiety etc.

BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:52:26

I'm in Surrey, is it low? A nanny friend of ours has 16 years experience and she gets similar.

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees Tue 12-May-15 15:53:57

Where do you live? I'm assuming central London. I'm a nanny with 15y experience and I wouldn't expect 14ph that seems like a lot.. is that net or gross?

TheEponymousGrub Tue 12-May-15 15:55:03

Sorry if this is obviously irrelevant but are you certain your Uni doesn't have any nursery?

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees Tue 12-May-15 15:55:05

Sorry crossed post ..

BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:55:09

That's net... We want to offer 10ph net and she wanted 14ph net.

BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:56:37

My uni does have a nursery but it's just not going to work, mainly because my youngest child is having a difficult time being left (I've tried nurseries etc) but also because I'll need my oldest taken to school and picked up.

BarbarianMum Tue 12-May-15 15:56:43

What's the market rate for a nanny in your area? And are you talking £10/hr plus NI and pension contributions and paid holiday or are you looking on them as being self employed?

I think not guaranteeing pay levels would be a problem.

foxinsocks Tue 12-May-15 15:57:03

so are you saying £12 an hour, 10 hours a day 4 days a week

so 52 weeks = £24,960 a year?

That's a good salary for a nanny tbh.

I would be careful agreeing to an hourly or daily rate. Can't you negotiate on the gross salary? As that sounds better and then gives you room to come back earlier as they are paid a set amount each month etc.

I wonder if the Wednesday day off is the issue

Duckstar Tue 12-May-15 15:57:33

The difficulty you'll have is the Wednesday off. The Nanny will struggle to pick up another job up that day so probably will need a full time salary. I think £10 per hour is about 20 k per annum which, depending where you are, could be too low. I'm in the SE not London and I would be looking to pay a minimum of 25 K for someone with no/limited experience. Are you going through an agency? I know they can be expensive, but they will give you advice on salary and requirements.

BarbarianMum Tue 12-May-15 15:58:02

Sorry x post.

BooChunky Tue 12-May-15 15:58:03

10ph plus tax and NI and paid holiday. We were going to use the company 'nanny tax'.

Fudgeface123 Tue 12-May-15 15:58:34

Keep looking, if you can't afford 14ph then you can't afford 14ph

foxinsocks Tue 12-May-15 15:58:40

NET

bloody hell

NotInGuatemalaNowDrRopata Tue 12-May-15 15:58:51

What about an au pair and putting the 2 year old into playgroup in the mornings or afternoons? Playgroups are cheap(ish) and would give an au pair some time out.

LaurieFairyCake Tue 12-May-15 15:58:54

One thing that occurs to me is that the nanny was maybe trying to tell you she wanted sole charge without interference when she said easter and christmas off - you're term time so will get a long time off ?

You don't need or want her there then do you?

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees Tue 12-May-15 15:59:47

14 ph NET? in Surrey? That seems terribly high, especially for someone with little experience.
Are you with an agency?

foxinsocks Tue 12-May-15 16:00:07

don't do things net, you will get yourself in a pickle

always do it gross. £12 or even £14 net is way too high.

Work out a gross figure that you can afford. Then if the tax changes, you don't suffer for it.

I employed nannies for 10 years and never once offered a net figure, I point blank refused

BeginnerSAHM Tue 12-May-15 16:02:47

£10 ph net perfectly reasonable for a fairly young nanny outside zone 1 and 2. Our cleaners get £11 ph because we like them and think they are great (zone 2) but they have to go from job to job and certainly can't clean for 10 hours a day and have no job security. I think you should keep looking!

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