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to think that brown-envelope letters from the benefit/tax/DWP people

(82 Posts)
HappySpills Sat 09-May-15 17:55:53

should come with a smiley/frowny/neutral face on the front, just so you know whether the thing you're about to open is likely to be a notification that you're getting some extra money (yay smile), a statement of taxable income for the year (okay fine), or a sudden demand that you fill in a seventy page form about all your shortcomings, or that you're losing £35 a week, or something similarly unpleasant (sad)? I don't think I can cope with another Schrödinger's envelope on my doormat this week.

StickyProblem Sat 09-May-15 18:00:50

YANBU! <heartfelt>

WorraLiberty Sat 09-May-15 18:02:42

I don't really fancy the thought of my postman having a nose at my envelopes grin

GeorgeYeatsAutomaticWriter Sat 09-May-15 18:04:09

Schrödinger's envelope grin grin grin

limitedperiodonly Sat 09-May-15 18:05:37

Brilliant idea. I got an HMRC one last week and thought: 'Oh fuck, what's this?'

But it was just a notice telling me that I could fill in my tax return at my leisure now or leave it until the clock is ticking on January 31 2016.

Guess what I'll do?

Roseforarose Sat 09-May-15 18:05:53

Is there a name for the fear of brown envelopes. If not one needs to be invented.

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon Sat 09-May-15 18:07:31


I have severe anxiety relating to post. (Years post divorce dealing with XHs numerous debts.)

I have decided that if I ever do run the country I will ban scary letters. They'll be delivered in pink envelopes and contain nothing rude, anxiety inducing or unpleasantly worded.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Sat 09-May-15 18:08:46

Yanbu. But thats on the assumption the letters arrive.

My local council have being taking £40 a month from HB for an overpayment they never told me about.

FernGullysWoollyPully Sat 09-May-15 18:09:02

Envelopaphobia ? grin

WorraLiberty Sat 09-May-15 18:09:11

King, would consider bringing back singing telegrams?

If so, I'd totally vote for you grin

HappySpills Sat 09-May-15 18:09:42

The "general increase in benefits" letter fools me every time - it's just thick enough to feel like an "actually, we've decided you don't need food any more" letter grin At least the statement of taxable income one is pretty unmistakeably skinny.

WorraLiberty Sat 09-May-15 18:10:31

Is there a name for the fear of brown envelopes. If not one needs to be invented

Envelope racism.

Groovee Sat 09-May-15 18:11:17

I reckon the DWP should send their non award letters in white envelopes as I know from a few forums that people have a heart attack when a brown one drops only for it to be a sorry we are taking so long.

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon Sat 09-May-15 18:11:42

Yes. Pink telegrams. Delivered by a particularly fluffy owl.

hedgehogsdontbite Sat 09-May-15 18:13:09

The brown envelopes already make me chuckle, while also trembling in fear. Unmarked brown envelopes so nobody knows where they've come from. Except they've gone so overboard on the nondesciptness of them that they're like a flashing beacon informing all and sundry that it's official government gumph.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Sat 09-May-15 18:13:21

Envelopes delivered by MP's by hands. I'd keep them busy.

HappySpills Sat 09-May-15 18:13:56

Envelope racism grin

SandBarIsland Sat 09-May-15 18:16:47

Is there a name for the fear of brown envelopes. If not one needs to be invented


SoonToBeSix Sat 09-May-15 18:19:43


CadieAgain Sat 09-May-15 18:20:50

Yanbu. They terrify me. The CSA use them too and news from them is usually awful as well.

itsallgonetitsup91 Sat 09-May-15 18:21:10

This is a fantastic idea. I'm always shook up by the weekly 'You have informed us about a change in your circumstances', I haven't informed them of anything confused And if I had is this not a waste of a letter?

UpOnDown Sat 09-May-15 18:21:43

When I got one from ATOS, it was in a white envelope, most disconcerting.

YaTalkinToMe Sat 09-May-15 18:23:48

No your not being unreasonable, we have a business so gets loads and every time I see one on the front door mat my heart drops.

stubbornstains Sat 09-May-15 18:29:43

Does nobody else have letters from Housing/ Council tax benefit that come in white envelopes with those green stripy edges? I'm sick of holding myself up against the door frame with wobbly knees, only to open the damn thing and find a 30- page missive telling me that precisely nothing has changed this time.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Sat 09-May-15 18:32:18

Stubborn My council tax stuff comes in those ones.

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