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Male Nursery Assistant

(724 Posts)
Loletta Fri 01-May-15 23:18:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Fri 01-May-15 23:19:10

She is BU and I think the nursery would be right to refuse her request.

clarinsgirl Fri 01-May-15 23:19:11

She is being unreasonable.

Happy36 Fri 01-May-15 23:20:22


ilovesooty Fri 01-May-15 23:20:27

The nursery should tell her to go elsewhere. That employee would be quite entitled to raise a grievance.

klmnop Fri 01-May-15 23:23:36

Very unreasonable!!

TiggieBoo Fri 01-May-15 23:25:13


Koalafications Fri 01-May-15 23:25:39

What on earth makes you think she could be being reasonable?

This is horrible, sexist shite.

Poor man.

siblingrevelryagain Fri 01-May-15 23:25:50

Unreasonable and v sexist. Nursery not allowed to discriminate.

CupidStuntSurvivor Fri 01-May-15 23:27:32

Horribly unreasonable. And I agree the nursery should tell her to find somewhere else rather than agreeing to it and alienating a valued employee.

He's had the same training and checks as the other staff. Having male anatomy doesn't make him any less qualified, nor does it make him less trustworthy.

Debinaround Fri 01-May-15 23:27:42

Unreasonable. I would have told her to get lost.

Jomato Fri 01-May-15 23:28:31

She is being unreasonable. You are also being unreasonable for thinking that having only boys makes it difficult for you to understand. Her child is not more at risk from this man just because she's a girl in the same way that he is not a risk just because he's a man.

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon Fri 01-May-15 23:29:00

Not sure.

I work with the elderly and many of the ladies request no male carers. Don't suppose this is hugely different.

Loletta Fri 01-May-15 23:31:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

morage Fri 01-May-15 23:31:32

Given that many women have experienced sexual abuse as children from men, I think it is understandable.

honeysucklejasmine Fri 01-May-15 23:31:33

Raging sexism. How upsetting for the worker. What does she think he'll do?! Poor bloke.

ilovesooty Fri 01-May-15 23:32:15

I think the nursery manager should be ashamed of herself.

backtowork2015 Fri 01-May-15 23:32:18

totally unreasonable. my ds is changed by women at nursery. .I don't complain. What's the difference?

TheBuskersDog Fri 01-May-15 23:33:20

What does the sex of your children have to do with anything? Presumably you let females change your son's nappy? You do know paedophiles abuse boys and girls, so she is no more reasonable than you would be.

odyssey2001 Fri 01-May-15 23:33:46

How awful. I am disgusted by this attitude.

Where does this end? No male doctors, nurses, teachers? How about bus drivers, shop assistants, postmen? I hope you told her that men who work with children don't automatically want to molest children. Most abuse occurs at home, from within the family.

Is she BU? FFS. YES.

AuntyMag10 Fri 01-May-15 23:34:20

I honestly would not be happy if it was my dd, however that would have been my problem and I would have found a nursery suitable to me not made this an issue.

fattymcfatfat Fri 01-May-15 23:35:18

completely unreasonable. just ridiculous to think that just because his anatomy is different he would harm a child. he went into that profession for the same reason most of the female employees did. not to harm them and quite frankly women could do exactly the same. it's not unheard of.

Dinosaurdrip Fri 01-May-15 23:35:28

Totally unreasonable, There is a male nursery worker at dd's (who's 2) nursery and the thought never even crossed my mind. In fact dd has an amazing bond with him and he was the only one she would go to when she first started.

ilovesooty Fri 01-May-15 23:35:34

No wonder so many men won't go into caring roles.

anothernumberone Fri 01-May-15 23:36:33

I am horribly sexist on this, based on what I accept are my own negative life experiences, but I would be likely to pull my child from that nursery. For example many of the priests in Ireland who abused children became priests because of their access to children and men are disproportionately represented in child abuse even though women throughout society have significantly more access to children. My hackles would be highly raised as to why a middle aged man would take up a child care role but again I accept I am most likely by any general accepted standard being unreasonable.

Is it possible your friend has her reasons.

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