have posted in aibu for traffic but if this bothers anyone please report and have it moved
there is quite a long back story so please bear with me
my friend (DF) has 4 dc, the eldest, is a DD, who is 9. DF was in a relationship where she was suffering emotional and physical abuse. She finally left him last summer and fled their home. She was placed in a refuge and was in quite a bad place psychologically, the children were distressed so Her ex, her eldest DD's father (who is not the man she had fled from) offered to take her DD temporarily. This was on the understanding she would come back and live with DF once she was housed appropriately.
However, he lied to DF and now does not let DF see her DD, he is blocking contact by not answering his phone. She has not seen her DD for months now and is very distressed about it. When she last spoke to her DD, her DD said she wanted to come home, her ex, however, says that she doesn't. He has also moved house 50 miles away and won't disclose his new address to DF, she has no way of contacting her DD other than through her ex's mobile number which he doesn't answer. She does, however, know which school her DD attends. I cant believe he has done this as, up until she went to "temporarily" live with him, his contact with her was sporadic, he never paid maintenance and was not really interested in her.
She has been housed now and is settled with her other DCS, who are in school. But she is still quite vulnerable and doesn't know where to turn for help and tbh doesn't have much support, many of her family judge her for letting her DD dad take her in the first place, I agree tbh but she did it in good faith and it's done now and I think DF knows that she made a mistake in doing that.
I know its an unusual situation where it is a dad keeping a mum from a child, its more common the other way round :( but it would be great if I could get some advice for her as I want to help but honestly don't know how. I just feel so sorry for the child who is in the middle of all this.
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my friends ex is not letting her see her daughter - am trying to help her
46 replies
WhiteConverseSkinnyJeans · 01/05/2015 17:03
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