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AIBU?

To tell work a customer pinched my bottom?

27 replies

LittleMissIntrovert · 26/04/2015 23:24

I promise I'm a regular poster, I haven't name changed.

This sounds ridiculous I know, but I feel upset and want to speak to my boss about it.

So I only work one day a week, and today I had my back to a customer, and he stepped back and pinched my bottom. I know it was deliberate, as he kind of did 2 pinches, a bit like if you would squeeze fruit to check its ripe. At first I thought he had mistaken me for someone else, (ok shouldn't have done it, but it could be a genuine mistake) or walked into me as he had his back to me too I think.

He then said oh sorry 'first name' (we wear name badges)

I said don't worry, and he walked off. I didn't think much of it at the time, but told 2 of my colleagues stood nearby. I just kind of laughed it off at the time, as I was embarrassed.

However on reflection it's made me feel really uncomfortable, and my friend said I should report it to work, as it's not acceptable and he could be doing it to others.

I'm going to go in tomorrow and try and speak to my boss, but I'm worried they will brush it off.

I have customers who brush past all the time, with their trolley, basket, hand, whatever. But there is a difference between a genuine brush, and a deliberate pinch.

I feel really uncomfortable about it, and I want to report it, even if they just look on CCTV and warn others or something I guess?

I'm not being unreasonable to report it am I? I don't think I am, but don't want to seem over sensitive!

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cleanmyhouse · 26/04/2015 23:29

Report it. You're not being sensitive. It's assault.

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LastNightADJSavedMyLife · 26/04/2015 23:31

Definitely report it,

Flowers that sort of thing can be really upsetting

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usualsuspect333 · 26/04/2015 23:31

I'd ask to never have to deal with him again.I'd want him banned from my work place.

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LittleMissIntrovert · 26/04/2015 23:39

Thank you, I'm worried work will think I'm being petty.

I work for a large retail chain, should I speak to my line manager, or the store manager do you think? (I've never actually properly met the store manager as she doesn't work Sunday's!)

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MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 26/04/2015 23:41

Tell your immediate line manager in the first instance. What he did was completely unacceptable and you have a right to work without harrassment.

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usualsuspect333 · 26/04/2015 23:41

I'd speak to your line manager first and take it from there.

He assaulted you. You are not being sensitive or over reacting.

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Andrewofgg · 27/04/2015 00:08

Report it of course. But unless he is a regular customer or paid by plastic I do not see that there is anything to be done - especially if he has the good sense to stay away from now on.

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LittleMissIntrovert · 27/04/2015 00:11

No I don't think there is much they can do, but I would hate not to report it, and something else happen to someone else.

I know realistically they cant do anything, but I still want them to be aware I guess?

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flora717 · 27/04/2015 05:51

Report it, the store might remind staff about not having to put up with harrassment, procedures etc. You wont be the only one, I'm sure he'll be a repeat offender.

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Humansatnav · 27/04/2015 05:57

Report, it's a horrible thing to have happened. Flowers

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CycleChic · 27/04/2015 06:02

Hugs. Report Flowers

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YouBetterWerk · 27/04/2015 07:45

Grim. Please report. Flowers

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Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 27/04/2015 08:37

There is nothing petty about someone invading your body and touching you where you do not want to be touched.
Flowers

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Marmiteandjamislush · 27/04/2015 08:50

Report. This is not normal behaviour and needs to be stopped, they'll have CCTV footage of when it happened, surely.

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Lilicat1013 · 27/04/2015 08:56

Mention it. It sounds like you work in a shop/supermarket, I would be asking for him to be banned from the shop and taking it higher if he wasn't.

You don't need to put up with this, some people think they can treat cashiers however they want and get away with it.

Sorry it happened, I hope your managers are supportive. If you don't feel confident talking to them could you take a friend with you.

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LittleMissIntrovert · 27/04/2015 09:10

Is it ridiculous that I feel physically sick about telling them?

I'm going to go in this morning and see when my manager is in, I'm just worried they will say there's nothing they can do, and just leave it, and laugh at me.

I need to do it though.

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mummytowillow · 27/04/2015 09:13

I work for huge retail chain, he would be given a trespass notice and banned from all stores if he'd done this to a member of staff.

Report to HR I say.

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ilovesooty · 27/04/2015 09:14

If they brush it off take it further up.

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TheMaddHugger · 27/04/2015 09:29

((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))

report it

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hobNong · 27/04/2015 09:29

You probably feel nervous because we've been brought up to think this is normal, harmless behaviour from men. It isn't. It shows a tremendous lack of respect towards and a sense of ownership of women's bodies. I mean, could you imagine yourself behaving that way towards a stranger?

When I was a bit younger I'd have been too scared to report. I'd be scared now but I'd do it. Start by speaking to your line manager and if they don't take it seriously move up to store manager. You deserve to work in an environment where you're free to carry out your job without some pervert making you feel uncomfortable.

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purplemunkey · 27/04/2015 09:34

This happened to me years ago when I worked in a record store. At Christmas time the shop floor was always jam packed so helping customers find what they need often meant brushing past lots of people. Some gross bloke took the opportunity to grab my arse under the cover of a crowd. It was horrible, just like you I was just doing my job. This happens on crowded trains too.

Report it and if he's a regular point him out to management next time he's in. I can't imagine it's the first time he's done it and doubt it'll be the last. They can ban him if he's assaulting the staff.

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TheCowThatLaughs · 27/04/2015 12:51

He might be on CCTV hopefully. Just because you were at work and he's a customer, doesn't mean he can sexually assault you and get away with it. If it's possible to identify him, then he should get a visit from the police imo!

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LittleMissIntrovert · 27/04/2015 19:18

Well I went into work and my manager isn't in this week! Spoke to a colleague who said she would let the other manager know I want to see her, and agrees it needs reporting.

I will pop in again on Wednesday if I haven't heard. Thanks for your support Flowers

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YouBetterWerk · 30/04/2015 18:20

Was your boss in yesterday OP?

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LittleMissIntrovert · 30/04/2015 18:44

Sorry I thought I had put on my update Blush

Popped in on Tuesday as I was in town, and spoke to the manager I tried to see on Monday.

She asked me if it was a regular customer, I said I didn't think so.

She said if it happens again I should tell them and she will ask the security guard to remove him, and tell him his behaviour is inappropriate. That was it.

I don't really know what I expected, but it would have been nice if they offered to look at CCTV or something :(

At least now I have reported it, if he does it again, then they can't say why didn't I tell them before.

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