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To think my next door neighbour's imitation is not flattering but sinister?

(103 Posts)
BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 09:41:52

I have nc for obvious reasons cue chicken noises

A brief bit if background(I'll try). We had next door neighbours move in about two years ago. They were very different to our previous neighbours who were eldery and very quiet. Having been burnt before by previous neighbours who took advantage when I got friendly and close to them- dropping their kids off regularly when I said I was busy etc, borrowing stuff and not returning it- I have ever since remained civil and friendly with neighbours but kept it at that.

The mum was very chatty, it was a wreck of a house that they were remodeling and she’d tell me snippets whilst we got kids into our houses from school etc- She kept asking me for my opinion and questions like where I’d gotten my curtains from, and wallpaper in the bedroom she could see when it was night time and she had driven past etc.

A few weeks later I found out we had a mutual friend who was at my house for dinner and she had mentioned that my NDN was dying for an invite to my house, she wanted to see what we had done etc, which I found weird, I guess because I don’t want someone I live next door to me making like tricky like before-

Anyway, I started to get pissed off a few months ago when they had something done to the exterior of our house which is identical to ours, in fact she made a point of telling me hers cost a fortune and were custom made- then our mutual friend said NDN had seen a photo of children at a party at my house on social media (uploaded by my friend) and my NDN had mentioned liking some interior features of our home- NDN has done the exact same things to her lounge which are VERY unusual and very home made (out of necessity, we don’t have much spare cash so I make –bodge—most things- and I started to feel a bit uncomfortable -if I am honest, I shook it off and just told myself it didn’t matter until yesterday. She has bought a replica of my brand new car. I’ve never had a new car and it took me ages to choose it and get excited about owning something from new (took 7 years to save for it) NDN even has the same model and identical colour- everything- the same.

I KNOW this is going to seem like petty first world problems but having brushed so much off, thinking about it yesterday and going over stuff that’s happened over the last year she has, got her hair cut like mine, wears almost identical coats/scarfs- had her DS’s hair cut like mine/dressed like mine, bought a dog similar to ours and called it a name with one letter out- think Kookie/Kiki. It’s so weird and creepy and right here and constant reminder. I’m a grown woman- if it were anyone else I’d tell them to be flattered but I am feeling suffocated.

Can anyone kick my arse? DH thinks I shoud get a Mohawk and get the car covered in leopardskin vinyl and I have to say I am tempted.

ajandjjmum Sun 08-Mar-15 09:47:02

I'd be irritated too - but I think your DH's idea is brill!

BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 09:49:31

grin I'm far too mousy to drive around in a pimpmobile aj but thank you.

I just wanted to let off steam. confused

LaurieFairyCake Sun 08-Mar-15 09:50:12

Yeah, you're only response is to have some serious fun with it.

Poundland and pound shops sell amazing shit you can hang outside that she can copy. Big floofy plastic owls and welcome signs.

Make a wreath out of jelly babies and hang it on the door.

You only have to do it until she does it, then bin the thing.

Any other response will just get you irritated.

WhereIsMYJonathanSmith Sun 08-Mar-15 09:51:10

lol This could turn out to be most entertaining smile

SaltySeaBird Sun 08-Mar-15 09:51:32

Become friendly, tell her you are planning a huge tattoo. Say you'll book a joint appointment if she wants a similar one. Let her go first ...

londonrach Sun 08-Mar-15 09:51:50

Like lauries post!

MidniteScribbler Sun 08-Mar-15 09:52:29

Yeah, it's weird.

I think you need to do what your DH suggests, or at least make very strong suggestions about what you're about to do - hair coloured blue, shaved head, etc. See how far she is willing to go.

Lydiand Sun 08-Mar-15 09:54:14

Had a friend like this, we were very different when we met, but she turned into me. I actually moved in the end to get away from her. People who haven't experienced it simply don't understand how stifling it can be.

TheReluctantCountess Sun 08-Mar-15 09:54:29

Buy one of those fancy dress sleeves, where it looks like a real tattoo all down your arm!

BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 09:55:43

I am REALLY glad I posted you lot are really funny. I was wound up like a spring at 9am, now the idea of jelly baby wreaths- how amazing, she's never do it surely! I'm not sure I could grin

Dognado Sun 08-Mar-15 09:56:16

Yes you should get a mohawk wig. Also a prominent fake tattoo.

popalot Sun 08-Mar-15 09:58:09

Had similar experience. It was all fine, a bit weird, kept thinking maybe I was overthinking.... until she told everyone I was copying her!!! Def do something a bit out of ordinary and see what she does. Or mention another neighbour who you think is really 'stylish' and maybe she'll start emulating them instead. Have fun but make sure everyone else knows who's doing the copying

BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 09:58:13

Lydia- I know, you put it perfectly- it's suffocating and I cannot get away smile. I may be mousy and unaable to rock leopard skin but I am a very confident person, well thought I was. Now I am panicking about stuff I have said, she made noises a few weeks ago about my dc's very tiny village school and I will be sick if her dc turn up there- imagine it! Because I'm imagining all sorts right now SWF anyone?

BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 09:59:06

I would like to point out this is NOT my friend but the lady who lives next door.

ahbollocks Sun 08-Mar-15 10:00:09

What about a wreath witherspoon?
It is a decorative wreath covered in pictures of reese witherspoon.
I get it though, I studied with a girl like this who ended up turning up in a wig cut and coloured like my hair.

Ps. Sort your social media privacy settings out

Koalafications Sun 08-Mar-15 10:00:14

Oh that would be annoying. I would find it hard not to say something to her.

chinstrappenguin Sun 08-Mar-15 10:00:33

Not sure what you can do short of moving. YANBU to be freaked out. I would be too.

MrsCosmopilite Sun 08-Mar-15 10:01:48

When I was an early teen I had a neighbour (also early teen) who did this. It drove me mad, undermined my confidence, and I never did anything about it at all.
Many years later our paths crossed and it somehow came up in conversation - apparently she thought I was 'really grown up' and was hoping by copying, she'd absorb that perceived maturity. In reality I was a shy mouse with zero sophistication or self-confidence.

I think you should get all the fun you can out of this - crazy wigs, fake tattoos, fake piercings, dress completely outrageously.... see how devoted she really is.

engeika Sun 08-Mar-15 10:02:25

Can't help but do understand. Had similar - but not to that extent. Would gasp with disbelief when I saw an identical piece of furniture being delivered in to their home not long after I had bought it.

They painted the walls the same colour, (used the same decorator and asked him), chose almost identical flooring, (having previously wanted something totally different but had seen mine).

I kept them out of the house and kept very quiet from then on. It was just that she was a very poor decision maker and lacked confidence and it just seemed easy to say - "Oooh that works for engeika - it will work for me". Don't think she even realised what she was doing. All calmed down now a bit now. It is a horrible feeling though OP

DartmoorDoughnut Sun 08-Mar-15 10:03:39

Some fab ideas! I'm liking the fake tattoo one the best grin

Florabeebaby Sun 08-Mar-15 10:05:22

There is a house nearby to mine and their garden is filled with all the shit from poundshop...I'm telling you all of it! You should do that! Put it out in the evening and see how long it will take for her to follow smile

And the Mohawk wig sounds amazing!

BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 10:06:03

ahbollocks my social media setting are tight- I cannot control other people's who have taken photos in my home.

CundtBake Sun 08-Mar-15 10:06:16

Have you commented on the dog/car/haircut/house to her? And has she replied?

Yanbu though, that would really creep me out

BorisBrushe Sun 08-Mar-15 10:08:57

I really am going to consider some of these.
Thank you- and it is comforting knowing others have been through similar. There's no way this lady is setting foot over my doorstep. DH told me yesterday when I was away she asked if she could look at our house layout because she was thinking if changing her around a bit- he told her we had identical layouts and said no (that shocked me- cheeky cow)

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