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About fussy eaters

(101 Posts)
Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 22:24:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

simontowers2 Mon 09-Feb-15 22:26:44

I think this goes way beyond your friend being a fussy eater OP. She sounds like a fruitcake.

Caronaim Mon 09-Feb-15 22:27:46

It sounds like a serious eating disorder

DoJo Mon 09-Feb-15 22:32:21

It sounds like she has food issues - are you concerned about her mental or physical health? If not and she is just focussed on maintaining a healthy diet, then I think you have to decide whether your desire to be her friend is overwhelmed by your desire to retain control over the food when you see each other. Is there a particular reason why you are offended about her suggestion that she cooks? Do you think she has picked up on your slight misgivings about her diet and doesn't believe you will accommodate her?

Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 22:33:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mintyy Mon 09-Feb-15 22:34:05

This is classic eating disorder territory.

Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 22:36:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SunshineAndShadows Mon 09-Feb-15 22:38:43

It sounds as if she still has control issues. Its not personal OP, its not you - its her and she's like it even with professional chefs!

Her history of bulimia is relevant I think. This sounds like a different type of disordered eating

HubertCumberdale Mon 09-Feb-15 22:38:58

It sounds like she has ARFID- Avoiding or Restricting Food Intake Disorder.
It tips over from just being fussy if it affects her health, life, or wellbeing.
Is she healthy? Is she OK?

PtolemysNeedle Mon 09-Feb-15 22:39:21

She has issues. Bulimia isn't something that just goes away, no type of disorderd eating ever completely goes away. People just learn to manage it and sometimes it's easy and sometimes it's really not.

Feeling resentment isn't good for you or her, try and be a bit more understanding and be compassionate towards her. It's unlikely that she wants to feel anxiety at the thought of her best mate cooking something that in theory she would like.

AggressiveBunting Mon 09-Feb-15 22:41:01

I believe the term is orthorexic- using a facade of 'healthy' eating to massively restrict food intake.

DisappointedOne Mon 09-Feb-15 22:43:04

I'm vegetarian, can't eat tomatoes and choose not to eat carbs. Bite me.

Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 22:45:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DisappointedOne Mon 09-Feb-15 22:48:26

If she's vegan that's how life is. Odds are she's sick going somewhere and discovering that meat is cooked with potatoes or the oil is animal fat. Or that the cheese isn't vegetarian or the eggs aren't free range. She's probably quite low on trust for the industry (you meat eaters were quite happily munching away on horse before that little media storm blew up).

Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 22:53:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OstentatiousBreastfeeder Mon 09-Feb-15 23:04:01

She just sounds... vegan. A passionate vegan.

Of course she wouldn't eat the pastry if it's made with butter confused

OstentatiousBreastfeeder Mon 09-Feb-15 23:09:59

My DD has food allergies and I don't allow people to cook for her.

It's not that I think they'll slip some egg or dairy into her food, just that without living with the restrictions we have to, someone may slip up without realising.

For my DD that could be life threatening, for your friend that could be emotionally devastating, depending on her views and beliefs.

Is she rude about it?

Notrevealingmyidentity Mon 09-Feb-15 23:14:35

I wouldn't expect a vegan to eat a tart with butter in...

I think possibly YABabitU.

Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 23:15:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TikiTigeress Mon 09-Feb-15 23:16:28

I don't allow others to cook for me blush it makes me really anxious, I'm not even sure why I just panic about germs and it not being clean. I've always been like it but got much worse after my 2nd dd was born, I think as I was so ill with constant sickness throughout pregnancy it put me off so many different foods I barely touch meat now and used to love it but the thought of it now makes me feel ill...know it annoys my dp (the cooking thing especially as he feels restricted with what he can make me plus he gets offended that I have to check what he's cooking too ����). I do try and curb it but it's hard.

Loletta Mon 09-Feb-15 23:17:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Birdsgottafly Mon 09-Feb-15 23:22:34

I'm Vegan, I would eat anything that someone who describes me as "fussy", has cooked, I've spent to many days on the toilet and in pain to take the chance.

I drop down to Vegetarian on very special occasions so I can eat out (I've had meals with dying relatives).

It's my Birthday coming up, I'd love to go to a Vegan restaurant, we've got a few in Liverpool that serve Vegetarian meals, or even meat, but no-one will accommodate that, I'm supposed to fall in with them.

It makes me laughs that some of my friends that have an attitude to me being Vegan, are no doing Juice Plus, because "a plant based diet" has power.

SorchaN Mon 09-Feb-15 23:23:55

Most vegans of my acquaintance are very careful about food because non-vegans don't know the complete list of things that vegans can't eat. No butter, no milk, no eggs, no honey etc etc. In fact, most vegans of my acquaintance won't eat with non-vegans because they don't want to watch people eating dead animals. I'm a dedicated carnivore myself, but if I wanted to go out for dinner with a vegan we'd be going to a vegan restaurant. Is that something you'd be prepared to try? (I quite like vegan food, although I won't be giving up bacon anytime soon.)

Birdsgottafly Mon 09-Feb-15 23:24:17

Also, what's wrong with bringing her own food, it makes everyone's life easier.

badtime Mon 09-Feb-15 23:26:29

Tiki, you sound like you might have some OCD symptoms there. If these feelings are making things difficult for you, there are treatments that can help.

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