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Am I the only farmers wife who is sick to death of hoovering up straw, hay, silage and other varieties of animal fodder?

(37 Posts)
Disgruntledfarmerswife Tue 03-Feb-15 13:57:29

Kind of light hearted and I know that bringing the outdoors indoors comes with the territory of being a farmer's wife but fucking seriously!?

I hoovered this morning, tidied round, lit the fire, got DD up dressed and fed etc. DH walks in, shitty wellies chucked off just inside the front door caking my best boots in cow shite, hay and straw. Walks into living room does the Macarena to rid himself of any excess hay & straw he may have collected whilst he was worzel gummaging it, tramples his way up the stairs. Takes his shitty clothes off and leaves them on the landing in a nice heap (next to the empty laundry basket angry) jumps into a nice warm bath. Shaves his 2 week old stubble off whilst in the bath, gets out of the bath, pulls the plug, doesn't bother to rinse any of his grotty face pubes or tide mark away.

Dries himself and then puts the wet towel that he has used to dry his arse with on MY pillow on my side of the bed. My day off is sorted! Didn't want to do anything nice anyway

Eve Tue 03-Feb-15 13:59:01

cant you run him over with a tractor or make him live in the hay shed?

Disgruntledfarmerswife Tue 03-Feb-15 14:04:04

I wish sometimes lol

desertmum Tue 03-Feb-15 14:04:09

not a farmers wife but you have made me laugh - we have horses and dogs and the house and cars are constantly full of muddy wellies, riding boots and straw, leads, poo bags. No sooner have I cleaned the house than dogs and muddy boots clomp across my kitchen floor. No words of wisdom just sympathy and flowers

ThatBloodyWoman Tue 03-Feb-15 14:08:41

Its not because you're a farmers wife,its because you're a lazy sods wife,and you're letting him get away with it.
He's treating you like a maid.
I suggest layers pellets in his coffee,and grass seeds in his pants drawer.

BarbarianMum Tue 03-Feb-15 14:12:47

<<Its not because you're a farmers wife, its because you're a lazy sods wife>>

This. I have an outdoorsy job and have been a zoo keeper in the past (think hay, straw and rhino shit). I don't trample mud all over my own floors because I'd be the fool clearing it up.

sparechange Tue 03-Feb-15 14:16:07

Farmers daughter rather than wife, but can you have a 'decontamination zone' near the (back?) door?
We had a 'no wellies or boilersuits past this point' rule

Disgruntledfarmerswife Tue 03-Feb-15 14:23:04

I've tried that. I think we could do with a porch as the door that we use opens straight into the kitchen. We have wooden floors in there but they are so grotty and horrible due to all of the mud etc that gets trampled in.

I try setting these house rules and feel as though I'm going to bust a gut. It is just laziness! Things like using a tea towel to dry his hands and instead of hanging it back on the hook he just chucks it over the clean pots hat are in the rack.

I know that it will never be immaculate or anywhere near but it would be nice to walk through the living room without tripping over kids toys, clothes etc. it would be nice to stop having my mum whinging at me because the house is a mess and I can't have a child living in conditions like that. I just seem to struggle and any motivation is flawed because the realist in me is just saying "what's the point, it'll be exactly the same tomorrow and you'll just have to do it over again"

I know being on here isn't helping but FGS it's my day off!!

liquidstateisonthemulled Tue 03-Feb-15 14:30:13

Farmers wife here. He comes in the side entrance and everything gets done in the utility room and he hoovers. Teatowels go on the floor when used. I only ever use clean ones.

Your child will not suffer from a bit of muck, wear earplugs next time your mum starts grumbling.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses Tue 03-Feb-15 14:52:06

I am a farmers wife. He's just a lazy arse.
You need to come down on this like a ten ton sack of shit. Wellies/leggings/coats are kept OUTside. Do you have a shed with a sink? If so he needs to have a preliminary hand wash before coming in.

If you can, get your mum round and give the place a deep clean. Take pictures and have a 'this is how it stays' talk.
Impress upon him the fact that by treating the house with such a lack of respect, he is treating YOU with a lack of respect.

You really need to be strict about it. My DH used to be terrible because his mother was happy to slave after them all, but I'm not.

Set clear boundaries of what is acceptable. It's nothing to do with being a farmer, and everything to do with being lazy wink

Good luck!

ScotsWhaHae Tue 03-Feb-15 14:57:24

Please can we stop defining ourselves by our husband's job?

I don't refer to myself as a carpenters wife, no more than he introduces himself as a community learning and development coordinators husband.

TedAndLola Tue 03-Feb-15 15:07:14

Wife of a farmer here. My car floor in front of the passenger seat (husband doesn't drive) is a disgrace. Felt embarrassed presenting it for its MOT this morning. grin

GrandadGrumps Tue 03-Feb-15 15:19:36

Scots in my experience being a 'farmer's wife' is often very much a full-time job in its own right. Being a 'carpenter's wife' presumably isn't.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses Tue 03-Feb-15 15:59:28

Please can we stop defining ourselves by our husband's job?

Oh please. Here - biscuit

ScotsWhaHae Tue 03-Feb-15 16:02:00

Care to elaborate?

emmelinelucas Tue 03-Feb-15 16:26:33

Marrying a farmer means you marry into a way of life.

When I had seen to the pigs and cows (cows more pets than anything useful) I took my clothes off in the hallway, ran upstairs to get washed and my mum put the clothes in a binliner to be shaken and then washed.
It was a constant battle to keep muck out of the house.

ScotsWhaHae Tue 03-Feb-15 16:32:35

Doesn't mean you cease to exist in your own right!

Peanut15 Tue 03-Feb-15 16:41:31

Not the only one but what really gets me down is the washing. 2 under 2 and a farming dh (and me) and I do at least 2 loads a day.

My mil hAs a lot to answer for. I'm determined my 2 yr old will be better and I'm teaching my dh at the same time. It embarrasses him into action when the 2 yr old can fill the dishwasher better than him.

GrandadGrumps Tue 03-Feb-15 16:58:53

It's not a matter of ceasing to exist, it's becoming a 'female partner in a farming family' - or 'farmer's wife' as it's commonly known. It's more than a way of life, the life of the household is usually intertwined with the business.

ScotsWhaHae Tue 03-Feb-15 17:01:25

I'm well aware of the dynamics, thanks. I'm of farming stock myself.

WestEast Tue 03-Feb-15 17:08:24

I wanted to be a farmers wife when I was little. In my 8 year old head I would galivant in a field with my huge flock of sheep and make copious amounts of jam with my gaggle of children. I suspect I may have let my imagination run away with me
<helpful emoticon>

Dontstepinthecowpat Tue 03-Feb-15 17:09:54

My DH wouldn't dare step over the contamination line of the utility room.

A few of our friends DC have had E-coli. This is enough for us never to bring farming muck into the house. DDog gets decontaminated in there as well and I have a washing machine for normal clothes and one for clothes worn on the farm.

ThatBloodyWoman Tue 03-Feb-15 17:11:49

I'm with Scots here.

Idontseeanysontarans Tue 03-Feb-15 17:13:54

I married into a farming family. My MIL would rip strips off FIL if he brought muck into their house grin as would I if DH did that when he goes up helping.

mortil2 Tue 03-Feb-15 17:17:22

do we really need to get into whether is 'farmers wife' or 'wife of a farmer'? This was meant to be a lighthearted thread.

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