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For making up poo puns to keep myself entertained during tummy bug hell?

(40 Posts)
Dutch1e Sun 01-Feb-15 21:22:55

There's some kind of heinous tummy bug in my house that only affects men. DP and DS smell like a punch in the face. I'm so far unaffected. In between loads of washing and scrubbing poo off the walls (that was DS, not DP luckily) I'm keeping myself entertained with poo-related puns. So far I have "Poo-nami" "Poo-plosion" "Three Shits to the Wind" and "Bowel Down Before Me"

Contributions welcome. I'm desperate.

MrsTawdry Sun 01-Feb-15 21:24:20

Shitanigans as in "Stop all this shitanigans!"

Janethegirl Sun 01-Feb-15 21:30:25

A sense of humour is vital in such situations and you've got one flowers

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 01-Feb-15 21:36:01

Jane, don't you mean a sense of humour is vital in such shituations?!

Groan... I'll get my coat...

Dutch1e Sun 01-Feb-15 21:39:18

shituations grin
The name's Bond. Shames Bond.

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 01-Feb-15 21:41:38

Shaken, not shit-stirred...

Janethegirl Sun 01-Feb-15 21:43:09

Sage brilliant grin

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 01-Feb-15 21:44:43

This shit called Digni-teeeee a la Deacon Poo...

I'm here every night this week, folks!

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 01-Feb-15 21:46:09

I fear I've invested too much in this thread. Still, never let it be said that I'm a one-shit-wonder!

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 01-Feb-15 21:48:27

Or there's the amazing 1980's (s)hit, 'Poo' by Spandau Ballet...

Dutch1e Sun 01-Feb-15 22:00:54

SageYourResoluteOracle is hereafter dubbed the Turdminator for the heavy investment in this thread. And gets Time in Loo for all the hard work.

lemisscared Sun 01-Feb-15 22:02:44

do you remember this from school? "i was walking down the stairs and it was running down my flairs...diarrhoea, diarrhoea

Doilooklikeatourist Sun 01-Feb-15 22:10:05

Is shit there
Or Hopefully not
Is sick there
( to the tune of Department S .. Is Vic there ? )

Ememem84 Sun 01-Feb-15 22:12:20

tip for you...don't drink a bottle of (homemade) breton cidre. we just have. the result

on the poo pun front though... are you still up shit creek?

Nectarines Sun 01-Feb-15 22:13:23

To add to lemisscared's song

I was shouting for my mum
It came squirting out my bum

Diarrhoea diarrhoea

ShatnersBassoon Sun 01-Feb-15 22:13:42

If you're crappy and you know it, wash your hands.

Mummageddon Sun 01-Feb-15 22:19:14

I refer to a poo left floating in the toilet (e.g in the loos at work) as a shit-and-run incident.

can't believe I delurked for that

Ememem84 Sun 01-Feb-15 22:20:03

"heeeeyyyyy diarrhoea ayye" (sung to the tune of the macarena...)

SageYourResoluteOracle Sun 01-Feb-15 22:22:33

Arf at Turdminator!

<takes a bow>

RunDougalRunQuiteFast Sun 01-Feb-15 22:26:46

Crappocino ... Coined by a friend whose DD had explosive poo for months!

LongDistanceLove Sun 01-Feb-15 22:28:41

LeftTheWashingDrankTheWine Sun 01-Feb-15 22:28:56

lem grin

Smelling like a rotten egg,
it was rolling down your leg,
diarrhoea, diarrhoea!

laineylou Sun 01-Feb-15 22:33:17

Some people think it's funny
but it's not it's brown and runny

Diarrhoea, diarrhoea grin

Dutch1e Sun 01-Feb-15 22:45:58

Crappocino grin I'd take a Crappay Latte in a pinch

flora717 Sun 01-Feb-15 22:55:54

Puns to deal?
Excremental my dear.

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