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To not want to contact my aunt?

(8 Posts)
cloudymournings Sat 31-Jan-15 13:15:13


I have name changed - I could really use your thoughts.

My aunt is my dad's sister. She has two sons - my cousins. One is about ten years older than me, the other, the same age.

My mother died when I was 16. Things went very fractured for a time between my dad and I (he moved in with another woman very soon afterwards.) I barely heard from my aunt for years afterwards: wasn't invited to my cousins wedding. She just wasn't really part of my life.

I saw slightly more of her when my dad met a new partner. But then three years ago my dad died very suddenly and my aunt really behaved appallingly (I think.) She started saying that my dad had planned to leave everything to me not my brother at all and she kept saying that he (dad) was worried about us both. My brother killed himself about six months later and I'm sure her words were one of the reasons he did.

I haven't seen her since or contacted her.

Then we saw her yesterday - by mistake, in town. She acted shocked I had a baby and kept asking why I hadn't been in touch.

Aibu to not want to know her?

Aeroflotgirl Sat 31-Jan-15 13:21:18

No don't, she offers nothing to your life, just leave it there and move on.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Sat 31-Jan-15 13:23:46

God no, avoid her like the plague.

You owe her absolutely nothing.

HowCanIMissYouIfYouWontGoAway Sat 31-Jan-15 13:29:15

Not unreasonable at all.

You don't owe anyone a place in your life, particularly not when they behave so disgustingly.

Tinkerball Sat 31-Jan-15 13:31:31

No. We wouldn't hesitate to cut a friend who is not for good for us out of our lives and this should apply to family to.

cloudymournings Sat 31-Jan-15 13:32:25


I don't have a problem at all with not contacting her - I think it just shocked me a bit that she was suddenly there, you know?

I don't think she's a particularly nice person.

cozietoesie Sat 31-Jan-15 13:36:14

I wouldn't contact her myself - what would she add to your life in a positive way?

LadyLuck10 Sat 31-Jan-15 13:38:17

Yanbu, sorry about your parents and sibling op. Yes don't have anything to do with her. In your hardest times she wasn't there at all, so now you really don't need her to be.

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