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AIBU to want to go boo hoo hahaha when men say they feel excluded by the the term "feminist"

(369 Posts)
GoddessWhoWalksEarthAsWoman Wed 28-Jan-15 23:39:13

Just wondering if anyone else thinks like me...Go.

FarFromAnyRoad Wed 28-Jan-15 23:41:27

Nope. I would find that attitude quite draining and a bit unhealthy. But that's just me - clearly you're very happy with yourself OP so - well - errr - meh.

GingerCuddleMonster Wed 28-Jan-15 23:44:22

Well if that's how you feel, that's how you feel about it. Crack on.

FeckTheMagicDragon Wed 28-Jan-15 23:44:35

my initial response in my head to that was 'Bo-fuckin'-Ho'

One side of me thinks if we didn't have to fight this fight, you wouldn't feel excluded, and also - don;t dictate to women what we call the ongoing fight for equality. The more amiable side of me thinks, you should to be on our side, but don't dictate to women what we call the ongoing fight for equality.

avocadotoast Wed 28-Jan-15 23:45:22

Nah, I know what you mean OP. It's generally my knee jerk reaction tbh.

Hamiltoes Wed 28-Jan-15 23:46:31

Sorry I'm with far.

In my opinion gender equality will only happen when the gender divide stops. "Boo hooing" someone on the sole basis of their gender goes completely against what gender equality stands for.

God that was hard to get my head around. confused

trufflesnout Wed 28-Jan-15 23:46:33

How to spot a cunty man: "I don't believe in feminism, I believe in egalitarianism" (said with despairing sighs & patronising looks)

PetulaGordino Wed 28-Jan-15 23:54:45

I don't feel so much "boo hoo hahaha" as that it's not really my problem

AntiHop Wed 28-Jan-15 23:56:52

For feminism to be successful, men have to lose some of their power and privilege. So it's not surprising some men feel excluded. That's the point. Decent men who believe in feminism will accept that men need to lose power and privilege in favour of women, to even things out.

MrsTawdry Wed 28-Jan-15 23:57:04

Me too OP.

Oh the poor, marginalized fuckers.

MrsTawdry Wed 28-Jan-15 23:58:18

Anti exactly! My DH (father of daughters) is looking forward to the day he can say with absolute honesty that the world is equal for men and women alike.

OhAhhMissus Thu 29-Jan-15 00:14:54

The younger me would have been all hand wringing over eglatarianism.

Now I just think what a twat. I've never met anyone who felt excluded by feminism or who thought that it'd gone too far who wasn't a shining example of why feminism is sorely needed.

MoominKoalaAndMiniMoom Thu 29-Jan-15 00:24:41

I look back at my 'Ooh no I'm an egalitarian' phase and cringe at how twatty I was.

SorchaN Thu 29-Jan-15 00:45:18

I don't really care if men feel excluded. That's their problem, not mine.

MrsTerryPratchett Thu 29-Jan-15 00:47:45

How to spot a cunty man: "I don't believe in feminism, I believe in egalitarianism" Answer to this is, "Great! So what have you done to fight for egalitarianism, you wank badger?". Because my theory would be; fuck all.

Leontine Thu 29-Jan-15 01:16:30

What's wrong with egalitarianism and why does someone believing in it make them a twat?

BuggersMuddle Thu 29-Jan-15 01:47:40

Umm, no. Assuming you're a female, I'd be delighted to know why. I label myself as a feminist. I don't label myself as a radical feminist and I have zero interest in getting involved in the trans debate.

My DP would is happy to label himself feminist despite being male. It doesn't always mean he walks the talk, but at least we have a starting point of agreement at least.

EBearhug Thu 29-Jan-15 02:16:38

I failed to show any sympathy when male colleagues complained that a meeting dominated by women would be intimidating. I pointed out I had to deal with the opposite every single day of my working life, so maybe they might start to get an inkling of what it's like.

But apparently that's different.

FreudiansSlipper Thu 29-Jan-15 02:20:13

why would a man feel excluded

yes I would roll my eyes too. they would go on to say something like its gone too far now then sadly be backed up by a few desperate to be on the mens side women sad

Tinks42 Thu 29-Jan-15 02:24:45

Im 52 and been on mumsnet for 6 years. Ive resigned myself to being single now forever grin Rather that than ever spending time with a dickhead man that believes my place is to be beneath him in every sense of the word grin

QueenTilly Thu 29-Jan-15 02:58:30

I have never encountered an "egalitarian" who ddn't spend a lot of time criticising feminism and absolute no sodding time campaigning (even in discussion) for equality in any of the issues traditionally associted with egalitarianism. They never exactly seem to have subscriptions to the New Internationalist, for example. But I've even heard "I'm an egalitarian because I'm happy to fight for everyone". Words do not make deeds, especially when I've seen your posting history!

Also the same kind of people who say "feminism has been taken over". What exactly do they think they're doing to the word "egalitarian"?

trufflesnout Thu 29-Jan-15 03:39:25

I look back at my 'Ooh no I'm an egalitarian' phase and cringe at how twatty I was.

We all went there probably, the difference is we left it behind grin

MrsTerryPratchett Thu 29-Jan-15 05:31:06

What's wrong with egalitarianism and why does someone believing in it make them a twat? Good question.

There are two answers. One, because it always is twats saying it. Two, because feminism, in the broad sense, is about equality. It just acknowledges that women don't have it yet, something that egalitarianism doesn't. Exactly what the twat wants. Not to acknowledge inequality.

Caronaim Thu 29-Jan-15 06:03:07

men ARE excluded and disadvantaged in many situations. it is no nicer from them that it is for us.

FayKorgasm Thu 29-Jan-15 06:33:39

Caronaim women and girls are far more disadvantaged globally,this is a fact.

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