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AIBU?

To leave?

51 replies

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:17

To just walk out and start a completely new life in another part of the country?

I guess it's impossible but the thought is pounding in my head today. Has anyone done this? Did it make you happy?

OP posts:

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LaurieFairyCake · 28/01/2015 15:18

You know the saying that if you move YOU go with you.

So sort out what the issue is here and then move when it's clear that its a desirable thing to do

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:19

I asked if anyone had ever done it.

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LaurieFairyCake · 28/01/2015 15:20

Sure, lots of people run away.

What's bothering you?

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:21

Nothing particularly laurie. I just feel I'm due a fresh start.

When I say move away I don't just mean move house but effectively start my life over again. Cut off all past contacts and so on

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LaurieFairyCake · 28/01/2015 15:23

So you've got some twats in your life ?

Cut em out. Have a good look at what you did to encourage/allow this to happen.

Check that you definitely don't like the place you're in now. Then moooove.
Pick somewhere nice.

SomewhereIBelong · 28/01/2015 15:23

I have... was fed up of a small Scottish island upbringing, moved to the SW - almost as far as I could I guess. Found work, got married had a family.

Living the life I want to live. I am what my friends call "smugly content", always smiling.

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:25

I haven't got any twats in my life. What are you talking about? Where did I say I knew any twats?

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LaurieFairyCake · 28/01/2015 15:27

You said 'cut off all past contacts'

Surely if they were life affirming and wonderful friends and family you'd keep them?

SurlyCue · 28/01/2015 15:28

I got very close once but the prospect of not being close to those i did love was too painful for me. And i was running away from a problem i thought would never changed. Im so glad i stayed and worked it out. At least now if i ever decide to go elsewhere i havent burnt any bridges and can always come back to my loved ones.

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:28

I haven't got any. I just mean obviously you know people even if you aren't close. Doesn't make them a twat or that I'm doing something wrong does it? What's your problem?

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smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:29

I'm a bit like that too surly

OP posts:

SurlyCue · 28/01/2015 15:29

I think you need to give some more info if you want specific advice OP.

LaurieFairyCake · 28/01/2015 15:30

Ok, so you have no friends or family? Just acquaintances you're happy to lose ?

Sounds ideal to move then. Good luck.

SurlyCue · 28/01/2015 15:31

Ok what is it you want away from? If you had a magic wand what would you change?

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:31

I don't want specific advice, I wondered if anyone had done it and how they found it.

I feel being here feels dangerous somehow and I hate it, it's oppressive and disturbs me but I'm scared to go.

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dejarderoncar · 28/01/2015 15:32

I packed up my stuff aand my animals and moved to another country, knowing nobody, nor the language. Ten years on I have never been happier and wish I had moved forty years ago.

smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:33

Wow that's amazing! Did you have a job there?

OP posts:

LaurieFairyCake · 28/01/2015 15:33

Have you always felt that the place you live feels dangerous to you? Or is it a recent thing?

What makes you scared to leave?

SurlyCue · 28/01/2015 15:36

Are you in a big city or somethig? What makes it feel dangerous?

dejarderoncar · 28/01/2015 15:37

Being on the street in many parts of the UK stressed me out, the aggression, drunkeness, the threat of violence often in the air. In both city centres and small market towns. I think the British charácter is aggressive compared to many other nationalities.

SurlyCue · 28/01/2015 15:37

Fwiw- if you have no DCs i would say try it. (I have and had DCs who would be affected by moving away from family)

Or travel at the very least.

JinglyJanglyMe · 28/01/2015 15:37

Hey smokeandfluffcat I am not much use to you yet. I am in the process of doing it. I've been thinking about it for, well forever really. I just want to go and start again.

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smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:37

You can feel threatened with no immediate threat, not something I can explain.

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smokeandfluffcat · 28/01/2015 15:38

Me too jingly; to change my name, start over, in a sense become someone else.

OP posts:

maz210 · 28/01/2015 15:39

It sounds like something is worrying you.

I know this line is trotted out often on parenting sites but could you be depressed? Depression can make you feel like just walking away from everything.

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