An old boyfriend of my sister's died about ten days ago. He was only 50 so it was sad. She's not been in touch with him since they split at age 17...but she was sad nonetheless as they went out for a year. She heard of his death on social media and has sent his Mum some flowers.
My Mum, keeps on bringing it up...am I hard? Mean? I find it odd...she didn't meet him above a handful of times...my sister isn't in mourning at all...though as I said...it is sad.
Mum just rang me to say "It was natural causes!!!"
I said "What was?"
As his death wasn't on my mind I couldn;t think who she meant.
"Tom!! He died of natural casues!!"
I said "Oh...he was quite young for that...maybe it was a heart attack" and she said "No...it wasn't!!! It was just his time!!"
I told her I had to go...and that I wished she wouldn;t keep bringing it up all the time. She's mentioned it daily since it occurred,
She hasn;t normally been like this when someone we know has died and yes...we have lost other youngish people of a similar age so it's not that.
Maybe it has shocked her, someone of her child's generation, and she feels the need to analyse it? I don't think it's mawkish, it reflects different personalities and different reactions to the news of a death.
Pausing she's not worried about anything that I know of. She tends to "get into" something now and then. Not long ago she was overtaken by a tremendous patriotism and watched all kinds of guff involving "The troops!" and went on about "The Pomp and Ceremony!""
Did my head in.
Now it's this man's death. She's bored if you ask me. Needs a hobby. I love her so much but GOD why do Mother's do your nut in?
It does sound a bit odd - but deaths can affect us in odd ways and I've been really upset by reading about some deaths of famous people than of people close to me whom I actually knew. I think sometimes there are particular details which might resonate - age, or recent marriage break-up, or health issue or something which makes us reflect on ourselves or those close to us, and bring unspoken worries to the surface. It can also be harder to deal with if the image you have is of someone fit and healthy, and then they're just dead, whereas Great-uncle Tom, who was in his 90s and suffering from Alzheimer's or something isn't a shock in the same way.
I would guess it's triggered something in your mum, but she'll stop mentioning it as the shock is less.
My mother used to phone up and launch into something because she'd been having a conversation in her head, and forgot that we hadn't been involved with that part of it all, and didn't have the background. So that sort of behaviour is just normal to me.