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to not want to take my DCs to a different location on Friday?

(32 Posts)
BiscuitsAreMyDownfall Tue 27-Jan-15 18:01:38

So there was a letter from school about how the children are going to be Ice Skating at another near by school on Friday. They are to be dropped off at this other school at 8:45 and picked up from this other school at 15:15.

We live rurally and the school only has 2 classes in comprising of 25 children in total so it is very small. It has been partnered to the other larger school (the one which the DCs are expected to go to on Friday) a year or so ago. The head from the other school is now also the head to this school. They still remain different schools with different rules (such as the start and finishing times, uniforms is different too - although this seems to be slowly changing to the other school)

Now surely my job is to make sure my DCs get to their current school on time and to pick them up in time. If there is a trip somewhere else then is that not up to the school to transfer the children to the trip? They are often going to this other school for various reasons and they hire a bus. Or are the school within their rights to say that x day the children will all be going to this other school so parents have to take them there?

Its not as if they are having lessons as far as I can tell, but there is going to be a synthetic Ice Rink set up in the school hall. The school they go to is 100 yards away from our house. Luckily I am able to take them to this other school, but its not very convenient for me. If I was working we would have no chance unless I used a holiday day to do this.

Pancakeflipper Tue 27-Jan-15 18:06:34

I don't see it as an issue really as long as it is not a very regular occurrence. Sounds like a fun treat.

Wouldn't other parents help each other out if pick up was tricky or do I just send my children to a school with helpful parents?

tiggytape Tue 27-Jan-15 18:06:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BiscuitsAreMyDownfall Tue 27-Jan-15 18:14:23

it isn't uncommon for one off events for parents to drive Ive not known of it before, but appreciate that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

No it isn't an issue this time, but it will be in the future when Im working (assuming I get a job) Im just curious if the school are allowed to say that we have to take our children to another school when they are enrolled at the near school.

addicted2cake Tue 27-Jan-15 19:14:53

why don't you ask the school what would happen if for example you couldn't get your children to the other school or pick them up?
It does seem unusual but a fun treat for your little ones!
I'm really lucky to have some great mummy mates from school who regularly pick my one up and vice versa.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses Tue 27-Jan-15 19:18:01

It's a small school in a rural area.
My DS is in a class of 7 in a small rural school. Us parents all know each other well and no ones child would ever be left behind in similar circumstances.

I don't really see the issue.

BiscuitsAreMyDownfall Tue 27-Jan-15 19:26:19

I don't really see the issue

There isn't one this time, or is that breaking the rules? Im still allowed to start a thread about something to see what opinions people have.

So far no-one has an issue with a school saying take your children elsewhere for the day not to the place that you should be doing. So that's fine maybe IABU and that's fine too.

If I couldn't get them there I would have to tell the school. Not lived here that long and dont feel comfortable asking other people to take/bring back my DCs.

Its going to be a faff as I will still need to be back in my village for 9 to pick up DH (he will be taking DD2 to nursery in the village), but not undo-able. Id rather not have to be told that they are to go to a different school than the one that they are enrolled to. If it was further away then it would be difficult.

nobutreally Tue 27-Jan-15 19:41:26

I'm afraid you will find this happens - but probably only occasionally - say 1-2 times a year. You may also have times when you need to pick up early or late before/after trips - again, assume 1-2 times a year ish (per child).

Is it a hassle sometimes? Absolutely. And certainly I've had occasions when I haven't been able to manage it - so I've either had to talk to school (who can often help out) or (more often) done a lift share/swop with another local mum. You get used to the expectations that schools have that parents will be able to work round things like this smile

MidniteScribbler Tue 27-Jan-15 19:58:17

It's hardly a regular thing, it's not like they're asking it of you every week. Boohoo, I have to go a bit out of my way so my child gets an interesting experience. I do think some people just like to whinge for the sake of it.

fleecyjumper Tue 27-Jan-15 20:20:39

I understand what you are saying. OP isn't complaining on this occasion but is asking what would happen should it become a frequent occurrence. I think that as you are enrolled at the one school then the school should transport across sights. Be warned though, this sounds like they will eventually close down the smaller school. Schools do this merger type thing as a precursor to one closing. Maybe you will be lucky and it won't happen while your daughter is at school, but it will happen.

BiscuitsAreMyDownfall Tue 27-Jan-15 20:21:20

Fucking hell. I did hear that AIBU can be harsh, but I never noticed any worse than anywhere else. until now. Fuck me.

Right as I said before ok perhaps IABU, but is there any fucking need to be so fucking rude Midnite

It was a question. I have now found the answer that yes it does happen. That was all I wanted to know.

Thanks nobutreally and others who have nicely told me that IABU. I accept that.

BiscuitsAreMyDownfall Tue 27-Jan-15 20:22:45

crossed posts fleecy

TBH I am expecting the school to close eventually anyway, but while it is still open Im just curious about the whole take your children to this other school thing. Well i was, but not anymore.

PassMeTheFrazzlesPlease Tue 27-Jan-15 20:31:56

I don't think you are being unreasonable. My DC go on trips sometimes and they are always taken to and from school on a coach. So drop off and pick up is the same. We have never been asked to take them anywhere else. Some parents don't drive.

In our area, lots of parents would struggle if they were asked to travel to a different location because they have staggered drop-offs in the morning: one DC at a preschool, one at infants, one at junior etc. The same for working parents, many don't have any time to spare at all as they rush straight from dropping off to drive to work on time.

BoomBoomsCousin Tue 27-Jan-15 20:56:30

I don't think you're being unreasonable to be concerned. We ocassionally have to drop off early or pick up late for school trips, but never to another site. And never dropping off late or picking up early, which would be difficult if you scheduled work around the school day as many do, I think it's still a problem for children who are normally collected by childminders though.

I think it would be wise to talk to the school to let them know that, while you can do it this time, you expect it to be impossible in the future and ask them what their provision is in that situation.

Muchtoomuchtodo Tue 27-Jan-15 21:01:02

I think that it's U of the school to suddenly expect parents to be able to get their dc to a different location.

It might be a one off, or it might not.

If people don't speak up on the first occasion about any concerns that they might have (affects getting to work, CM doesn't drop to the other location....) then the head may decide to do this more often.

I would definitely have a word with the head and ask if this is going to become a frequent occurrence and explain why you're worried.

PurpleCrazyHorse Tue 27-Jan-15 21:20:05

YANBU. I couldn't manage this for DD. Last school year both DH and I worked f/t so used breakfast club and a childminder, therefore we would have had to ask to take time off (which might not have been granted). Now DH takes the car to work and I'm a SAHM with no transport during the day. I applied for DD's school because I can walk to it. I would expect the school to run a minibus for children who can't be taken to/from the other school. We've also just moved to a new area and don't know anyone well enough to ask for a lift (or to take/return DD).

WeAllHaveWings Tue 27-Jan-15 21:21:58

Any day trips as ds's school are always setup as a pickup/drop off at his own school.

They sometimes send a slip giving parents the choice to pickup from the other location at 3pm or back at school at 3:30. I honestly think there would be a lot of complaints if they told everyone they must drop off/pick up at another location so I don't think YABU.

Caronaim Tue 27-Jan-15 21:26:26

YANBU I don't have a car and find this sort of thing impossible. It is becoming more and more common as school link up in academy chains. I've even known families near us apply for one school and be allocated a place in a different school in the same academy chain, or staff be ordered to work on a different site, irrespective of whether they can reasonably reach it or not.

I don't think schools should be allowed to get away with making these sort of transport demands, and would protest on principle, before it becomes an established procedure that schools think they can spring on anyone any time it suits them.

BiscuitsAreMyDownfall Tue 27-Jan-15 22:37:26

OK so maybe INBU then. Maybe a little, but not completely.

Well I will sign the form and take it into school myself, but say that its ok this time, but in the future it might not always be. You never know other parents might have said the same.

Ive seen before where they have been on a trip and the option to pick from the other school has been there, but its always been an option. There is an after school club run at the other school that my DCs are entitled to go to, but requires picking up from that school. Now that is fine as its extra curricular, but Im a little unsure if it is fine to expect children to automatically go to the other school for normal school time.

steppeinginto2015 Tue 27-Jan-15 22:57:25

YANBU we have similar
we have a partner school about a mile away.

It is walkable from us, but too far for dd to walk alone.

Dd was chosen to do 2 things, both brilliant, both things she was chosen for. But both entailed 7:30 start at other school, and 5pm pick up.

I have 2 other dcs, one to get out of the door at 7:30 and one to get to our own school. Then evening activities which don't allow for random 5pm pick up.
As it happens, we have a car, and usually dh works from home, but many families at our school don't have the luxury of either, and if they live on the other side of the school it is further to walk.

I am parent governor, and I had a word with the head and said lovely, but, not really on. No kid should be excluded because they can't get there. There should be a drop off at our own school, not fair on families to expect them to be able to do that. She agreed and now there is a pick up at our school.

MrsTawdry Tue 27-Jan-15 23:01:02

YANBU it's happened to us too. Again it's a small rural school but so what?

For a WEEK we had to get the DC to an even more rural location and I don't drive!

Obviously I was happy they could do forest school but it was annoying...I was new to school, didn't know any of the parents and felt odd asking for lifts!

BurningBridges Tue 27-Jan-15 23:55:23

Steppeing me too - Governor for 2 schools that have "merged" - federated - we leased a mini bus, best money we ever spent, kids go here there and everywhere.

tiggytape Wed 28-Jan-15 08:29:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Seeline Wed 28-Jan-15 09:12:57

I don't think you are BU. If it is a whole school/whole year event, then the school makes sure the children leave from their own school, and are collected from their own school. Normal drop-off/pick up times may change but that's all.
I have only ever had to get my DCs to different locations myself if it is just a small group of children picked for a specific event, either during school time or after school eg rehearsals at a different location for dance/singing shows, taking part in interschool sports/activities or representing the school for matches. Even in these instances, I have taken other DCs apart from my own, and the school has arranged this after asking for volunteer parents.

FamilyAdventure Wed 28-Jan-15 09:23:48

Our school asks parents to drive children on local trips quite often. It's to keep the costs down and avoid hiring a coach, which doesn't seem to be possible for less than about £3 per head, regardless of how short the journey is.

The alternative is to charge the parents for the coach or not run the trip. However, where parents work or can't drive their child for another reason, the school will help them arrange a lift share or take them in a staff member's car. If you really can't/won't/don't want to do it, speak to the teacher and they'll sort something out.

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